Page 4 | To think beige buffets get a raw deal and have their place?

Iceplater · 2026-08-30T19:02:05+00:00

I recently went to the funeral of an elderly relative and the wake was in a working mens club. The buffet came out and it was a sea of beige - sausage rolls, quiche, open sandwiches, vol a vents (which I have seen for years), jam tarts, Mr Kipling. And it was glorious. I moved away from my home town and I’ve become a terrible middle-class fanny. This took me right back to the 80s and Sundays at my Grandparents when they put on a “spread”. I wouldn’t want it every day but it was amazing (despite it being a funeral). AIBU?

likelysuspect · 31/08/2026 16:24

freerangethighs · 31/08/2026 16:19

I've never understood the sneering at "beige food"; loads of low processed fresh food is vaguely in the beige range like rice, grains, potatoes, chicken, turkey, "white" fish and cheeses, scallops, white beans, hummus, etc. I always assumed the criticism was the lack of fruit and vegetables, although I suppose you could include bananas, parsnip, turnip, cauliflower, mushrooms - and peeled apples, pears, courgette, aubergine, and cucumber. A lot of the things people have described here aren't even beige.

Yeah come on, you know this is not what people mean when they say 'beige' food!!!

likelysuspect · 31/08/2026 16:22

5128gap · 31/08/2026 15:24

Totally agree. There's nothing like a pork pie buffet to knock any middle class fannyfication out of you and get the salt of the earth back in. Unfortunately I've become a terrible vegan fanny and can't avail myself as I'd like. Its my one regret.

What about a gala pie. Come on. You know you want it.

freerangethighs · 31/08/2026 16:19

I've never understood the sneering at "beige food"; loads of low processed fresh food is vaguely in the beige range like rice, grains, potatoes, chicken, turkey, "white" fish and cheeses, scallops, white beans, hummus, etc. I always assumed the criticism was the lack of fruit and vegetables, although I suppose you could include bananas, parsnip, turnip, cauliflower, mushrooms - and peeled apples, pears, courgette, aubergine, and cucumber. A lot of the things people have described here aren't even beige.

Wjdbxb · 31/08/2026 16:06

I love a beige buffet. But to be authentic it should also include:

a bowl of salad comprised of lettuce, cucumber and tomatoes that nobody touches
potato salad
cold rice with some peas in it that everyone takes a spoonful of for their plate but nobody enjoys eating at all.

CrispySquid · 31/08/2026 15:55

Was there a cheese and pineapple hedgehog?

aterriblemiddleclassfanny · 31/08/2026 15:48

Yuck. I would absolutely turn my nose up at that.

Flannelfeet · 31/08/2026 15:47

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 31/08/2026 15:16

Why TF was Sara Lee even cancelled? What did she do wrong except bring joy and diabetes to the world?

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😲 this covered in double cream 😋 or the strawberry one covered in double cream 😋. I wish we could still get them 😋.

Iloveeverycat · 31/08/2026 15:32

We have that occasionally and call it a party tea as it is usually requested for birthdays even though they are in their 20s with cheese and pineapple too. Also packet savory rice and crisps.

DreamingOfGeneHunt · 31/08/2026 15:32

I love a beige buffet. Sometimes when I really really can't be arsed after work I get a couple of boxes of frozen prawn whatevers, some sausage rolls and profiteroles and have that for dinner.

DreamingOfGeneHunt · 31/08/2026 15:30

WhatsUpWithGene · 31/08/2026 14:22

Grapefruit?! Who do you think you are?

It’s traditionally always been a potato covered in cheap tinfoil 😆.

No one was posh enough to have a grapefruit knocking around in the 80’s when this hedgehog creation began, it’s always been a potato.

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We had an orange at the Rugby Club Xmas parties in the 80s! Covered in silver foil to look festive.

Babyputyourpantson · 31/08/2026 15:29

DDs first birthday in a few weeks and we are going fully beige...finger food only and the only thing I intend on cooking are the sausage and cheese and onion rolls..can't wait!

Nincompoo · 31/08/2026 15:27

I love a posh buffet and I love a beige buffet as long as neither of them have potato salad, which has to be the most revolting food on the planet.

Any buffet without sausage rolls is an abomination.

Lemonyyy · 31/08/2026 15:24

I love a beige buffet, or British tapas as we call it in our house. I do think there is a lot of snobbery about food on here and most normal people do eat chicken nuggets/Coco pops/sausage rolls or whatever on a semi regular basis without dying 😂

5128gap · 31/08/2026 15:24

Totally agree. There's nothing like a pork pie buffet to knock any middle class fannyfication out of you and get the salt of the earth back in. Unfortunately I've become a terrible vegan fanny and can't avail myself as I'd like. Its my one regret.

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 31/08/2026 15:16

Flannelfeet · 30/08/2026 21:25

Awww braw...the strawberry one with the nuts round the sides 😋 👌

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Why TF was Sara Lee even cancelled? What did she do wrong except bring joy and diabetes to the world?

To think beige buffets get a raw deal and have their place?

likelysuspect · 31/08/2026 14:54

I actually really like soggy pastry. Very comforting.

Thatsillymama · 31/08/2026 14:50

I do love those types of buffets and some funeral sandwiches.

ChocolateApples · 31/08/2026 14:43

The thing is the supermarket beige food generally isn't very good. A homemade quiche with proper crisp shortcrust pastry is delicious. A flaky sausage roll too. But supermarket pastry is just sort of lumpen. Vol au vents are better because they are naturally baked blind before the filling goes in.

Yes, I'm a food snob. If I'm going to eat all that pastry I want the joy from it.

bittertwisted · 31/08/2026 14:37

It’s a mixture of snobbery and obsession with the horrors of UPFs
my view is the healthiest approach to food is to not take it quite so seriously, and have an 80/20 balance

as an aside, how nice are vol-au-vents

murasaki · 31/08/2026 14:30

TooOrangey · 30/08/2026 21:18

Charcuterie boards, grazing platters, smoked salmon blinis, caprese salads, bruschetta with various toppings, fancy canapés…

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Now I love that sort of thing. But I'd also happily throw myself into a beige buffet. I'm ecumenical on these matters.

DandyFatball · 31/08/2026 14:30

I love a beige buffet.

As said in Gavin and Stacey 'I'm not bringing a salad, no-one eats it' 😆

ohmywordies · 31/08/2026 14:28

I love a good beige buffet. Defo needs pizza slices and those chicken kebab things on sticks though.

ohmywordies · 31/08/2026 14:27

Nightnova · 30/08/2026 20:40

What do the oh so superior MC serve on their buffets then?

It’s the same stuff but it’s bought from Waitrose and packaged as ‘hand-finished pork sausage roulades in all-butter puff pastry’ or something like that. 😂

DoAWheelie · 31/08/2026 14:26

It's been over 20 years now and everyone still talks about how good the ribs were at granddad's funeral.

Funerals are all about looking back fondly on the past and remembering the good times together. It's only right that the food is nostalgic too.

WhatsUpWithGene · 31/08/2026 14:22

XenoBitch · 30/08/2026 20:31

That sounds really good, and I would have happily tucked in too.
I think there is not much in the way of pressure to make an impression with the food at funerals like you have at weddings or big birthday celebrations.
Although, if I had a birthday party, it would be a beige buffet complete with cheese and pineapple on sticks stuck in a grapefruit.

Grapefruit?! Who do you think you are?

It’s traditionally always been a potato covered in cheap tinfoil 😆.

No one was posh enough to have a grapefruit knocking around in the 80’s when this hedgehog creation began, it’s always been a potato.