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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to stay in a religious workplace where my views differ?

79 replies

Rosycoded · 28/08/2026 13:33

I feel disingenuous. My workplace is a religious organisation, where you are expected to believe and live out the faith.

I do have faith, but let’s just say that my faith is a much much less conservative and less rule-bound version than theirs.

I struggle with attitudes in the workplace sometimes, because I do not share my colleagues views on the rainbow community etc.

I work in admin, so there is not much direct need to discuss or expose my different beliefs, but I still am immersed in the environment.

i would look for another job, but the job market is so difficult right now, that it is very hard to find admin roles.

AiBU for staying in this job?

OP posts:
ToomuchCG · 28/08/2026 19:17

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Nocameltoeleggingsplease · 28/08/2026 19:20

A friend teaches in a catholic school. Senior management have to be catholic; the rest have to be respectful to the faith. I think if it was a role where you had to live and breathe the religion and you were lying about it then it would be different; but as long as you are respectful of their beliefs and doing a good job I really wouldn’t worry

MissyB1 · 28/08/2026 19:22

Sounds like you are massively overthinking it. Just go to work and do your job, if you hate the job/company/coworkers then quietly look for another one.

ExplodingSmittens · 28/08/2026 19:25

Is it the Plymouth Bretheren?

Frikkinperiod · 28/08/2026 19:26

I worked at a Christian publisher for a while. The majority of us were full on happy clappy. A minority of us went to church once every few months. The rest of us were somewhere inbetween.

The minority were pretty silent if the majority view of something was being shared.

If you agree with the main tenets of the faith and the commonality between the denominations, then i think you're fine.

Frikkinperiod · 28/08/2026 19:30

And from OPs posts, i don't think it's a school.

However, if it is, i know 2 CE primary headteachers who aren't Christians, let alone practicing.

5128gap · 28/08/2026 20:29

When I was young I worked at a charity run by a church. I was chatting to the vicar once and admitted I didn't believe in God. He said "Oh, Im sure He knows that. But as long as you keep working for Him, He doesn't mind."

whatcanthematterbe81 · 28/08/2026 21:52

Feel like I know it’s a Jewish organisation. Only because I’ve been there

CatFairy · 28/08/2026 21:55

There’s nothing wrong with staying and you don’t need to share your opinions with your colleagues, but do consider the toll it can take on you yourself to be working somewhere that doesn’t align with your own values, not least if you find you are “masking” things.

I would echo posters’ advice to keep your eye on other jobs for that reason.

canuckup · 28/08/2026 22:08

Just crack on

I worked in a Catholic school, and just smiled any time anyone mentioned anything religious

Original poster
Rosycoded · 29/08/2026 00:56

DurinsBane · 28/08/2026 16:28

I would have guessed they were ‘anti LGBT’ and you were not, but from your term ‘the rainbow community’ I assume you are the one who has issues with the LGBT community?

I’m sorry I didn’t realise “the rainbow community” was offensive. Where I live, that is how everyone refers to it, including those in it, to my knowledge.

OP posts:
Justawalk · 29/08/2026 06:58

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BasilandTom · 29/08/2026 07:08

Although British, I don’t teach in the UK. I can assure you that the deeply Catholic country I teach in hold an official hard line on gay people and the actual Religion syllabus we follow has asked me to explicitly teach 6 year old children that they are born with sin. I ain’t telling small children that.

Justawalk · 29/08/2026 07:10

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BasilandTom · 29/08/2026 07:12

I never said I did. That’s not relevant to the OP’s post about disagreeing with her employers religious values.

Justawalk · 29/08/2026 07:19

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throwaway3749574 · 29/08/2026 08:24

do you have to do things like participate in prayers before meetings? If so, I’d find that hard and feel disingenuous too. If there’s nothing like that then I think it’s fine.

Original poster
Rosycoded · 29/08/2026 10:09

throwaway3749574 · 29/08/2026 08:24

do you have to do things like participate in prayers before meetings? If so, I’d find that hard and feel disingenuous too. If there’s nothing like that then I think it’s fine.

Yes, we do.

OP posts:
Justawalk · 29/08/2026 10:17

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allthiscarryon · 29/08/2026 10:21

Rosycoded · 29/08/2026 00:56

I’m sorry I didn’t realise “the rainbow community” was offensive. Where I live, that is how everyone refers to it, including those in it, to my knowledge.

Show quote history

I’m gay. That’s not offensive!
It would depend for me - are they saying things Ona daily basis that you think is wrong? I would be fine with all the ‘I live Jesus, I live Jesus’ stuff but would not be okay with ‘
Gay people are - bad, shouldn’t get married etc’ stuff. Or anything sectarian against other religions etc

Belief is one thing, bigotry another.

allthiscarryon · 29/08/2026 10:23

throwaway3749574 · 29/08/2026 08:24

do you have to do things like participate in prayers before meetings? If so, I’d find that hard and feel disingenuous too. If there’s nothing like that then I think it’s fine.

I would tell them you don’t want to do that anymore, that you’re finding another route through your beliefs that are personal to you.
If you’re in the U.K. they can’t get rid of you for your choice not to participate

TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum · 29/08/2026 10:30

For me it depends on how much you diverge from your employers beliefs.

If you are doing admin for Islamic State or the Westborough Baptist Church maybe you should leave.

Salvation army or a faith based primary school - maybe thats ok.

Original poster
Rosycoded · 29/08/2026 10:37

Millytante · 28/08/2026 14:18

Look at it this way: some people have to work in munitions factories or Russian bot farms. Never mind the odour of sanctity if the general atmosphere tends towards the decent and not intentionally harmful.

Jeez the things that were talked about in various GB Civil Service offices I once worked in! Give me raving God-botherers any day, instead of those blockheaded bigots.
What I’m saying is, religion’s just another vibe, really. Like football mania, how to eradicate Irish people, or the joys of Freemasonry: it can swirl around you in the office but it needn't take up your attention. You : 🙄.

Show quote history

I love your way with words. A hoot! 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Rosycoded · 29/08/2026 10:39

TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum · 29/08/2026 10:30

For me it depends on how much you diverge from your employers beliefs.

If you are doing admin for Islamic State or the Westborough Baptist Church maybe you should leave.

Salvation army or a faith based primary school - maybe thats ok.

Evangelical but not extremist is the vibe I’m working in.

OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 29/08/2026 11:21

Rosycoded · 29/08/2026 10:09

Yes, we do.

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Did the job come with a GOR? If not, then you can certainly choose to remove yourself from things like prayers.

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