AIBU sleeping arrangement

The real issue is that you are annoyed with your sisters because you think they should be showing more deference to you and your condition.

Doesn’t sound like they are going to budge (and why should they) so it’s you on the sofa if you refuse for it to be your DH or to take up your parents’ offer. Not ideal but not impossible at 20 weeks ‘with twins’. You could, in fact, lie on a blow up mattress in the living room.

You mentioned a brother in law in one of your posts. So presumably one of your sisters isn't bringing their DH. I think it would be best for your DH to also stay at home for the weekend.
Alternatively, if it means that much to you that he has a decent bed then I would sleep on the sofa myself. Personally even the bed was very uncomfortable when I was pregnant so it wouldn't have made much difference to me if I was sleeping on the sofa or the bed as very little sleeping actually happened.

OP, you are pregnant, you dont want to be worrying about trivia like this and you dont want to be falling out with family at this time.

Stop mollycoddling your husband. He’s a grown man and about to be a father. Tell him the situation and leave it to him to resolve. He can balance up the cost of a hotel with the discomfort of one late night & early morning.

Whatever you do, DO NOT end up sleeping on the sofa yourself! Youre pregnant and deserve some coddling yourself. Ideally by the man who impregnated you.

Can't DH let the dogs out if he's on the sofa ! Mum can have a lie in then !

Do you and your sisters all need to visit at the same time? Is this a special occasion? If not, I'd just visit your parents when your siblings aren't going too.

There is no way that you will be able to stay with your parents when your sisters are there once you have given birth to your twins so visiting separately from your sisters will then be the new normal. Just start it a bit earlier.

Dont bring your husband then. Same as your sisters

It’s not your house @strawberrylemons. You have moved out as have your siblings therefore it is up to the hosts, your parents, to make the decision.

If they are unwilling to tell one of your sisters to take the sofa then your DH will have to or you take your parents up on the offer to have the double bed.

As someone will be up early to let the dogs out perhaps a parent on the sofa for the night is the easiest soloution.

Sorry but I can’t see any valid reason why your DH can’t kip on the sofa. Does he sleep naked? Or with a pink thong on? So what if people get up and let the dogs out? Is he not capable of saying ‘Morning John! Looks like a lovely day! Shall I pop the kettle on?’

And then he gets off the sofa, which will be covered with a duvet, wearing a nice respectable set of M&S men’s PJs and get up and talk to your family!

What’s the issue? I don’t get it. My DH or Dad will have always taken one for the team and always drawn the short straw when it comes to sharing beds or driving or having the toast that fell on the floor.

He sounds a drip! Just kip on the sofa! You say you are all familiar and comfortable with each other.

I don't really understand why it's not OK for your husband to sleep on the sofa - he has become a member of the family, right? And as long as he makes sure he's in nightwear, I don't see the problem if your mum appears to deal with the dogs? My DH would think nothing of sleeping on the sofa in this scenario.

And regarding the bit about chatting till 11 or 12 - it's only a couple of nights, he'll survive!

Could you have an airbed in the living room beside the sofa? That way he's not feeling awkward alone when people pass through? One of you on the sofa, the other the airbed? I know I'd feel awkward in someone else's house on my own, in a communal room, but it'd be alot better if my DH was beside me.

It doesn’t sound like your parents’ house is big enough for all of you to visit at once. It certainly won’t be when you have twins and al their paraphernalia.

You’ve rejected all the suggestions that have been given. So, DH can’t possibly sleep o. the sofa, on an airbed, in bed with you, on the floor next to you. You can’t afford a hotel.

So, you can-
Go without DH.
Visit at a different time to your sisters.
Invite everyone to yours.

It wouldn’t be awful, it’d be fine for one weekend. He’s a fully grown adult, not a baby.

Surely though when you rock up and it comes to bed time once your DH sees that either you are sleeping on the sofa or your parents are moving out of their room he will just say its ridiculous and he will sleep on the sofa.
I know you don't want him to but if I were him I would insist on it.

Jesus Christ 😳

So you want one of your sisters to sleep on the sofa but not your dh? Yabu. You are all guests in the house what difference does it make. You sound entitled - yes absolutely you should have a bed, your dh gives up the bed for you, sorted! Or can he have a camping mat on the floor if your room if he is that precious about the sofa. Unnecessary drama imo

thank you!

I have no idea why OP is annoyed they aren't giving up the bed for her. She has a bed, in her bedroom. The issue is where her husband is going to sleep. If he doesn't want to sleep in the living room and would prefer to make his heavily pregnant wife sleep there instead then that is his issue, not his sister in law's to solve.

If he doesn't want to sleep in the living room, you need to pay for a hotel or just not go/not stay the night. You've asked your sisters to give up "their" rooms (for your husband), they've said no, that's the end of it. Going forward your parents will have to decide how they manage the space when you all visit, particularly if you bring a baby as well.

Essentially I think you'll have to accept you can't all visit and stay over at the same time from now on - most families understand this is an inevitability as families grow. Whether that means you take it in turns to go home or get a hotel, whatever.

This isn’t your home - you aren’t ’hosting’ a guest in this scenario. You and your husband are choosing to visit your parents. There’s nowhere for him to sleep in a bed so he stays home, sleeps on the couch or does something involving a floor somewhere. I think him staying home is the obvious solution. (Or honestly both of you just choosing any other weekend!) but that’s up to you. You aren’t letting the family down by your sisters choosing to sleep in their old rooms, it’s not your house and you can’t magic up different rooms or furniture.

What about a double air mattress and you both sleep in the lounge? Plenty of families do that.

it is literally the last time this will happen so you just need to get through this and then you’ll never have to worry about it again.

I don’t understand why DH can’t sleep on the sofa? You keep talking about his “privacy”. Is he obsessive about having an 8am wank or something?

You haven’t even asked him if he minds the sofa, so it makes it look like you are engineering a situation where you get preferential treatment because you’re pregnant.

Great idea but wouldn’t arrive by tomorrow

It is weird you would make such an issue of this, to the point of not seeing your family, when your DH is then perfectly happy to sleep on the sofa.

You’re really turning this into a huge issue when there’s no need.

You're being ridiculous. Your husband sleeps on the sofa and gets up when your parents get up to see to the dogs. He isn't too precious of a princess to do that, I promise.

Whatever happens this time, you need to have a proper conversation with your parents, as ultimately they have caused this by either inviting more guests than they have room for or by saying yes to the last guest coming when they knew there wasn't space and expecting you to suck it up.

We had to have a similar conversation with my ILs after having children. It's lovely, in theory, that when we visit (we live furthest away) the other siblings want to see us and want to come as well, but families with babies couldn't just be stuck on camping mats in a big line with all the random cousins, more the merrier style, like they suggested.

The first time they said yes to too many people and we had to book a hotel, despite being the initial guests, they realised and helped pay towards it. Now when we plan to see them, we check they have the rooms assigned for us. Luckily SIL has a close friend her and her family can stay with on the next street. She worked that out herself, so it's possible if your parents can get over saying yes to everyone and seeing it as "their rooms," then you can move forwards to the next stage where they are the grandparents, rather than the parents with a family home.

Temu here could be your friend. They sell a cheap airbed that converts a car backseat into double bed assuming you have a car. If he’s bothered this is a good option.

Personally I’d sleep on the sofa and give no shits about privacy if it wasn’t for the dogs which I am allergic too . So car option would be fine for me.

is also be as akward as F when DS what me to do anything they ask in future.

Surely this is going to become an even bigger problem once the twins arrive and when sisters get partners.

You just won’t be able to all sleep over.

Sofa or bare floor on some blankets for him since it’s such a tight fit. I wouldn’t give up my bed for my siblings partner either tbh.