AIBU sleeping arrangement

You sound lovely @strawberrylemons , really thoughtful and considerate. You’ll be an amazing mum 🙌.

Are these the first grandchildren? As your sisters sound jealous, and even if not, their behaviour is selfish and very twattish. I would do this in a heartbeat for my sis.

I think it may have to be a blow up bed in the living area for you and hope your sisters feel shame enough to offer up their bed, or your parents persuade them. How shameful of them both!

And I wouldn’t have been able to accommodate a DH at my childhood home either, and the sofa was impossible to sleep on, sooo old and uncomfortable!

If someone is to make a change to accommodate your pregnancy it should probably be the person who got you pregnant.

This is mad seeing as your husband doesn't even seem to have an issue with it and you're falling out over an argument he's not asked you to have and is probably irrelevant.

i see a lot of people on here think my sisters would be giving up the bed for my husband but my parents wouldn’t have him sleep in the living room, so whatever happens he will always get my old room.

Your parents think a pregnant woman should sleep on a sofa rather than in a bed? Your sisters aside, surely DH wouldn't let that happen?

I think YABU. Your husband needs to take the hit here, obviously it’s not ideal but part of having a baby (or two!) is compromising your own comfort for your family and believe me once the babies arrive sleeping on a sofa for one night will not seem like the worst of it! He can sleep on the sofa and still keep his things in your room and use it as a place to “retreat” if things get too much during the day. It’s really not a huge deal if he’s woken by your family in the morning. It’s only one night.

I cannot believe the solution you have arrived at is you (heavily pregnant) sleeping on the sofa. Is your husband really ok with that?

If you were my sister, I would step up and offer you my bed at this point. But i would be utterly sickened by your husband’s childishness and selfishness.

I think the same will happen in your own family.

I would start looking at hotels or other options anyway as the house sounds too small for twin babies to be visiting. If it’s a 5 hour trip I’m guessing you’d be staying over when you visited so you’ll need to know somewhere to stay. 3 single rooms and a double is an odd layout but wouldn’t work as there’s nowhere to put cots or co sleep safely so hotel is only option anyway surely

I just find it really odd that you keep referring to your husband as a guest.

Surely your husband wont let his pregnant wife sleep on the sofa in his place??!

Do you have local friends that you could stay with? Or another relative?

Like PP have said, it will be very difficult to stay when your nuclear family go from two to four! That also doesn’t include all the things the babies will need!

If it’s causing this much of an issue already don’t you think it’s going to be a shit weekend? Why don’t you postpone and go another time? I personally felt a lot better after 20 weeks so you may be able to go alone as well.

Also just because you’d give your bed up, it doesn’t mean it’s wrong for your sisters to have a different boundary. It’s not just the bed- they might still have personal stuff, underwear, tablets, letters etc in the room. Personally I would really rather no one else sleeps in my bed, including my sister, and I’d rather not sleep in hers (in fact I’d probably prefer the sofa!!).

its the only option. Husband on sofa if a cheap hotel isnt an option. Not sure why that is if you can afford to have kids?

Then stay in a hotel. You sound very entitled. Why should your sister sleep on the sofa?

if he would let you sleep on a sofa so he can have a bed in a room, at his in laws place, then he should be an ex, your sisters are not thinking pregnant you should sleep on the sofa they are thinking since when did a man care about sleeping in front of people in a casual environment and why wouldn’t he sleep on the sofa. Sorry, but they are.

I feel like he needs a space he can retreat to when it gets a bit much

If he finds these family get-togethers overwhelming then this is a perfect reason for him not to come on this occasion. The other sisters don't have partners with them so it will make it a better balance. It really sounds common sense to me for him to be able stay at home in peace than be overwhelmed for a weekend.
I bet he'd really appreciate it.

Honestly if your DH prioritises his own comfort and sleeps in your childhood bedroom while you’re on the sofa pregnant and so ill you can’t drive or take public transport alone he’s a terrible partner.
This who scenario is literally crazy.

I would definitely give up my bed for my pregnant sister to save her sleeping on the sofa and I’m not sure I’d be comfortable sleeping on the sofa at my in laws and everyone traipsing through in the morning to sort the dogs out and seeing me in pjs with crazy bed hair either 😂
If there is space for a tent in the garden I would opt for that option, most people have one lying around or can borrow one and your DH could sleep out there in the peace and quiet.

Since you are now pregnant with twins you are going to have to make other arrangements . Might as well start now by trying out local hotels.

ps the man who is your husband and the father of your twins is now FAMILY, not a GUEST.

But you can't expect the two of you to take up 2 of the available bedrooms. That's not fair. And neither is turfing your parents out. And I don't think your husband should sleep on the sofa, it's awkward. So the options are - you go alone, you sleep on the sofa, you find a cheap hotel / AirBNB or you go another time.

Horrible sisters. Mine would be angry if I insisted on taking the smaller bed or my dh sleeping on the floor. They should be giving you more care and priority because you are pregnant. Horrible of them.

Hotel or husband on the sofa. Only options

Sorry but it’s ridiculous if your dh doesn’t sleep on the sofa, people suck it up for the family madness!!!

I honestly think at this point you need to get past the mindset of your husband being a “guest”. He’s your husband, their son/ brother in law and the father of your twins, he’s not really a guest. I really do think you’re being unnecessarily precious about him sleeping on the sofa- and that’s the obvious solution to me. I suspect that’s where your sisters are coming from too, and I can completely understand why they might not want to feel like a spare part whilst their brother in law sleeps in their childhood bed.

They are probably also setting a boundary now before you start asking them to sleep on the sofa to accommodate your partner AND your children too!

Buy your parents a double bed for one guest room. Some have singles on top, for luggage, if there is not much space.

If the husband can let them out then there is no issue about his space being invaded by the family in the morning. I wouldn't have my dog whimpering at the end of my bed because they have to go toilet but they still are expected to wait half an hour.

I told my sister she was welcome to stay with me but privacy would be limited and the dogs go out at 6. That's their routine.

I think bunks in the one room was a great suggestion.