AIBU to feel worse after therapy for past trauma?

52 replies

NotSureThisIsWorking · 27/08/2026 21:37

Hi wise mumsnetters, name changed for this,

I am 35years old and I’m new to therapy.
I’ve recently (last 6 months) had a strange sort of resurgence of traumatic memories and very negative thought patterns. It’s not like I have just ‘remembered’ being these traumatic events relating to teen sexual abuse but I’ve somehow managed to just not think about them for years until now.

I know that an event where I didn’t feel safe at all about a year ago has brought this on.

I started feeling anxiety a lot of the day , racing thoughts especially at night, night mares and waking up to panic attacks, low mood, feeling shit about myself and like there is something wrong with me and an increase in disordered eating and wanting to control food. I feel like I’m falling apart basically.

For my own, and my kids sake, I decided to do weekly therapy before considering the medication route . I like my therapist and I feel safe with her. I find it very hard to talk about some of the trauma but I’m opening up slowly. I never cry in therapy, is that normal? She’s says it can be. I feel close to tears sometimes and I feel sick and anxious but I never actually get upset. I don’t know why. I’ve been going about 8 weeks.

My issue is that I feel AWFUL after. I cry a lot and just lay in bed, or I punish myself by going for a long run until I’m almost throwing up to try and block the thoughts out, I slept terribly that night and usually have a panic attack from the intrusive thoughts about the trauma.

I would like to know if this is normal ?? Or if I should stop …

OP posts:

Openmouthinsertfood · 27/08/2026 21:47

I have heard you feel worse before you feel better. It makes sense as you are focusing on very unpleasant memories/feelings. I'm so sorry you're having to go through this, you are very brave. Have you talked to your therapist about this? I'm sure she could reassure you. I get the 'punishing' youself thing, maybe mention that to your therapist too. Very best of luck to you, again, you are being so brave, I wish you well. X

mindutopia · 27/08/2026 21:45

It is normal, yes. For a time at least. I used to feel like I was coming down with the flu or had a terrible hangover after therapy sessions. It didn’t last forever though. How long have you been in therapy and what sort is it? What’s the plan or your goal? I think one thing that isn’t helpful is spending years talking about bad stuff and never finding a resolution or a way to move forward.

You have to spend some time in the trenches first. But eventually you should be moving through to the other side. One other thing to consider is if it’s the right sort. For example, EMDR may be more beneficial than integrative therapy or psychoanalysis.

But yes, I did feel awful, especially the first 2-3 months. By the time I stopped (5-6 months), I felt much better. Overall, it’s made a tremendous difference in how that trauma impacts me now and I’ve been able to sort of process it and leave it in the past to an extent that I’m living a happy life again.

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