Friend’s reaction to my pregnancy news

I don't think she did anything wrong. Your pregnancy is important to you. Whatever's been happening to her is far more important to her. She did congratulate you.

And isn't it possible that the others only saw her post and thus responded to that, rather than going back to look at what she was responding to?

I have to say that if someone told me off on WhatsApp for my insufficient excitement at their pregnancy, a heart emoji is probably all I'd rise to. It's a bit juvenile. Be happy for yourself, OP. It's wonderful. But it's more important to you than to anyone else. For other people it mostly falls into the 'Oh, that's nice' category.

For you your pregnancy is huge. It’s wonderful and something you feared might never happen. It’s probably dominated your thoughts for a long while.

For many reasons these long distance friends understandably don’t have it as the same level of priority. Maybe they saw the message and didn’t get round to answering. Maybe they are having their own infertility challenges that they haven’t shared. You just don’t know.

Over the weeks, months and years these friends will demonstrate to you in real life how much they care for you and your family. This is the important thing and what you need to focus on.

Hmm. I suspect there is a side-chat. The heart emojis give that one away.

I agree with the poster who said it's a shame the rest of the group let Ms Narcissistic redirect the chat with her skills.

Actually it can’t be they don’t know what to say as you’ve basically told them you want congrats

Fair enough, I get that, but it’s not the First Lady’s fault, as they still are not doing it. Could they be concerned due to previous pregnancies they are unsure what to say?

How old are you all? Are there others in the group who may also be having fertility issues that they haven’t mentioned? I remember that stage of life and people were having issues with miscarriages, secondary infertility, fertility treatment. They might be going through stuff as well. Congratulations to you tho.

Oh she's very skilled!

It's a shame your other friends didn't see through it.

Jesus christ, did you read the op at all.

Op, not infertility but Ive had miscarriages and sadly I'm also bereaved mother of twins - stillbirth and neonatal death. 4 babies gone in 2.5 yrs. I felt the same way when I finally got pregnant with their sibling and brought her home. It's surreal when it finally happens. Congrats on your news and best of luck.

And they still didn’t respond. Other than some hearts, surely thay must tell you it’s not about lady one? As at that point the normal reaction would be oh god, congrats!

is there someone in the group struggling with fertility they maybe sensitive to?

Why didn’t anyone else respond? It’s fair to be upset.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.
I think you are however being a little unreasonable to be actively seeking congratulations in a follow up by ‘calling everyone out’. That’s just weird.

I am sure that your friends are happy for you. Not everyone likes the performative nature of celebrating news in WhatsApp group chats.

Wonder if your announcement got buried by self-centred friend, the next person saw her message and responded to that, and so on?

Wish you had posted what you actually put! It’s odd that no one has said congratulations even now you’ve called it out.

No one else has congratulated you on your news? At least the one that responded reacted to your news, what about the other wet lettuces who have said nothing??

CONGRATULATIONS 🎉

Congratuations, OP! Lovely news!

So you had one congratulations and a few likes of your message, no one else has actually said congratulations? Have I misunderstood, as that seems so very odd!

Yeah so there is more to this, as thays weird.

No. When a friend has struggled to conceive for some time and they share the brilliant news of their pregnancy your immediate reaction shouldn’t be “wow congratulations, thanks for telling me because I’ve had an awful week, x and y tedious things happened this week”. Just congratulate and leave the tales for another conversation!

That’s not really how group chats work though, she would be very unusual to think oh I can’t now say anything on this very active chat and need to wait till everyone has congratulated the op.

I would assume she didn’t think at the time no one else would then comment on your pregnancy. I mean you’d not would you. Few are as Machiavellian as folks think.

so I think it’s ok the others, who should have reacted to your news too

I’d not gp down the road of bad mouthing her as you are on here, just as you’re pissed off.

what did you say?

No, I didn’t say it was. I was responding to Satre’s comment. Congratulations btw.

@Sartre So everyone else’s life is mundane when you are pregnant and you are the only important one?