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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH's attire on family holiday

145 replies

onesinglepringle · 27/08/2026 08:28

Just looking for some opinions as I don't know if I'm being weird about this!

On a big extended family holiday, all staying in the same house with aunts/ uncles/ cousins/ kids etc that we don't see that often.

DH (late 40's if relevant) is walking around in just the shorts he slept in in the morning whilst he is sorting out our toddler's breakfast etc. No one else seems to be doing this, everyone else is wearing t-shirts.

Is this OK/ normal?

It is warm, and I don't want to tell him to cover up if I'm just being a bit weird and prudish about it.

At the same time, I'm hoping people aren't looking at him and wondering why he's wearing only his sleep shorts from like 6.30-9am, socialising, playing with the kids etc, so it's not just popping down for a coffee. He's unshowered, messy hair etc.

YABU - It's fine, chill out, it's family (even though extended family we don't see)
YANBU - he should cover up like everyone else

OP posts:
AnnesPuffedSleeves · 27/08/2026 11:08

Happyjoe · 27/08/2026 11:00

He's up early, he's sorting out breakfast for the toddler, he's playing with the kids.... He could do that with a g-string on, more impressed with him being a hands on dad!

That’s quite a low bar!

AnnesPuffedSleeves · 27/08/2026 11:08

When my DH wears cotton/jersey type PJ shorts, there is a lot of…ahem…obvious movement and outline. Perhaps that’s just my DH but I’d be asking him to cover up 😂

RobertaFirmino · 27/08/2026 11:06

I think we're missing the bigger picture here.

A man has put his children first. He has taken care of their needs before sorting himself out.

This is a relatively rare occurrence. Who cares what he's got on!

Happyjoe · 27/08/2026 11:00

He's up early, he's sorting out breakfast for the toddler, he's playing with the kids.... He could do that with a g-string on, more impressed with him being a hands on dad!

PepsiBook · 27/08/2026 10:59

You're worried about him walking around the house with his top off? It's hardly revealing. Why are you so worried?

Laura95167 · 27/08/2026 10:46

Top on for food IMO. If his sleep shorts are shorts not underwear id have no issue with a used tshirt over the top.

BrezhnevsLuxuriantEyebrows · 27/08/2026 10:45

I can see why going around shirtless might potentially seem a little de trop; but if he's really feeling the heat, there's no middle ground for men when it comes to tops. Women can wear all manner and sizes of tops, whether full or minimal coverage or anywhere in between; but for men, the choices are either t-shirt or no t-shirt.

PollyBell · 27/08/2026 10:40

CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone · 27/08/2026 10:32

Erm, what would you say if I asked AIBU about girls on the streets in bra tops and tight gym pants?

Or would that display be acceptable?

Show quote history

Would it be called body shaming?

Mulledjuice · 27/08/2026 10:40

SunnyRedSnail · 27/08/2026 10:02

Omg I thought you were going to say he was walking round the house with budgie smuggler style pants on.

The shorts sound fine, and if his body is toned and attractive then no tshirt required.

But no one wants to see someone in budgie smugglers with a hairy pregnant man belly.

if his body is toned and attractive then no tshirt required.

You are joking, I hope

Mulledjuice · 27/08/2026 10:38

Growlybear83 · 27/08/2026 08:36

If your husband is having a shower and getting dressed at 9 then I think you’re being ridiculous, unless his shorts are very revealing. But is he seriously getting up at 6.30 on holiday? 😮

Does your toddler sleep in on holiday?

Shatteredallthetimelately · 27/08/2026 10:34

Of course its fine, he's around his own family and should be able to wear what he pleases.

People wear more revealing clothing around strangers.

CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone · 27/08/2026 10:32

Lomonald · 27/08/2026 09:05

I would expect him to be dressed he isn't "at home" not everyone will want to see him half naked wandering about it the morning he really imo needs to put a t-shirt on, it is mannerable.

Erm, what would you say if I asked AIBU about girls on the streets in bra tops and tight gym pants?

Or would that display be acceptable?

Lurker85 · 27/08/2026 10:30

His body, his shorts, his family, don’t give it another thought and enjoy yourself!

DeftGoldHedgehog · 27/08/2026 10:26

I've just smiled at remembering my (very fit, tanned and sporty) dad used to wander around the house with no top on quite a bit when it was warm (though usually in trousers, perhaps proper shorts in summer) and my grandad (Mum's dad) used to harrumph about it as he thought it was a bit common.

PollyBell · 27/08/2026 10:24

Its not your body so why do you need to think for him? If he is not bothered why do you need to be?

InveterateWineDrinker · 27/08/2026 10:21

We were at a campsite in France where all the cabins on our little cul-de-sac faced each other.

French and German men seem to have no issue wondering around their verandahs in nothing but boxers in front of complete strangers first thing on a morning.

ThatBreezyScroller · 27/08/2026 10:16

If it’s his family and they’re proper shorts then it’s absolutely fine.

FieryA · 27/08/2026 10:16

I would expect my partner to wear a tshirt and shorts, when he is with extended family. I wouldn't like to see another man half naked and therefore, would expect my partner to show similar decency.

AbsintheMakesTheHeartGrowFonder · 27/08/2026 10:11

onesinglepringle · 27/08/2026 08:58

It's not a beach/ pool holiday, it's just a big house we are spending time in as a family. No one else has had their top off at all so that's why I'm a bit unsure.

Show quote history

Unsure about what, though?! What do you think the issue might actually be?

SunnyRedSnail · 27/08/2026 10:02

Omg I thought you were going to say he was walking round the house with budgie smuggler style pants on.

The shorts sound fine, and if his body is toned and attractive then no tshirt required.

But no one wants to see someone in budgie smugglers with a hairy pregnant man belly.

TrugFullofLove · 27/08/2026 10:02

Or those little chef's hat frills they used to put on rack of lamb at posh hotels.

DH's attire on family holiday
Tomfooleries · 27/08/2026 09:58

TrugFullofLove · 27/08/2026 09:53

Or doilies.

Show quote history

Doilies is a good one. I was going to suggest hankies with knots in the corners.

TrugFullofLove · 27/08/2026 09:53

TrishM80 · 27/08/2026 09:52

He needs to cover his nipples with tape for the sake of public decency.

Or doilies.

TrishM80 · 27/08/2026 09:52

He needs to cover his nipples with tape for the sake of public decency.

BogRollBOGOF · 27/08/2026 09:12

Meh, I'm in the female equivilient of pj shorts and sleep bra/ bralette as it was a bit warm for the t-shirt last night.
My teenagers weren't balking and all essentials are covered.

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