Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel uncomfortable about my partner's comment on teenage niece?

214 replies

Gingercatonshed · 24/08/2026 22:48

If your partner said to you “it was weird how grown up dear niece looks she had her boobs out at the family meal, I still just think of her as being so young” would you find this weird ?

for context partner early 30s and niece is 16. It made me feel uncomfortable not sure if it was genuine “oh she’s turning into a woman” comment from my partner or it its abit Pervy / strange to notice …

OP posts:
Styling · 24/08/2026 23:01

I find it creepy.

JustMarriedBecca · 24/08/2026 23:00

Sounds more judgemental than weird to me.

Original poster
Gingercatonshed · 24/08/2026 22:58

Minasama · 24/08/2026 22:55

I don’t think it’s strange that he noticed it - all men notice boobs, especially in a low cut top - and really without knowing his tone and the look on his face it’s hard for us to judge whether it was inappropriate.

I would find this an odd remark from a very new partner, but ok from an “established” partner unless it was said in a lascivious or “nudge nudge wink wink” way.

Edited

Yeah he did say it in a genuine “I still think of her a young child” sort of way rather than pervy. Maybe I am being sensitive but I’m trying to imagine how one of my uncles saying that about me would make me feel

OP posts:
Ooooohhhyessss · 24/08/2026 22:57

Sounds reasonable to me.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 24/08/2026 22:55

I’ve said similar about my own family member when she suddenly turned into a boobs out girl! It was a bit of an overnight shock

Minasama · 24/08/2026 22:55

I don’t think it’s strange that he noticed it - all men notice boobs, especially in a low cut top - and really without knowing his tone and the look on his face it’s hard for us to judge whether it was inappropriate.

I would find this an odd remark from a very new partner, but ok from an “established” partner unless it was said in a lascivious or “nudge nudge wink wink” way.

PrettyLittleRose · 24/08/2026 22:55

I can't actually work out what he said. He said 'she's so grown now, as she has her boobs out?' Confused

Original poster
Gingercatonshed · 24/08/2026 22:54

@ACatNamedRobin how so ? X

OP posts:
ACatNamedRobin · 24/08/2026 22:53

I would actually find it a green flag, the opposite of creepy.

hiddeneverythin · 24/08/2026 22:53

Maybe it made him feel uncomfortable and that’s why he remarked. Some things are very noticeable and they could have literally been staring him in the face. That said, keep an eye out for any more comments and call him out if he expresses an opinion on said boobs that were out

Original poster
Gingercatonshed · 24/08/2026 22:53

Well I wasn’t there so I tried to understand if it was an obscene low cut top or just a normal vest etc if it was the former I may understand the comment abit more

OP posts:
NoCommentingFromNowOn · 24/08/2026 22:52

Ew.

Any1ForTennis · 24/08/2026 22:51

Bit of a weird thing to comment on to be honest. Presume she had a bit of cleavage rather than boob's flopped out at the dinner table though?

BMW58 · 24/08/2026 22:50

Seems like a reasonable non-creepy remark to me.

Swipe left for the next trending thread