AIBU to feel uncomfortable about my partner's comment on teenage niece?

Why would any man in their thirties think that a sixteen year old girl was flirting with them unless they're a fantasist who thinks porn is real life

Was he worried she was giving him the eye?

I have never felt the need to comment on my nieces’ breasts. Maybe their height or that they’re young women not girls, but to vocalise that I’ve noticed their breasts seems very odd.

I think if thats the thought he thinks is acceptable to say out loud then I dread to think what's going on in his head.

Can you say exactly what he said? Your OP isn’t quite clear.
I don’t think it is appropriate for any grown man to comment on a 16 year olds breasts.

I think the ‘boobs’ bit is strange rather than a general ‘growing up’ comment. Ok yes they’re there. We see them develop and sometimes with a girl you’ve known since a baby or a child you might think it to yourself it’s a bit of a shock or notice she’s wearing a skin tight top or whatever. But for an adult man to talk about a young girl or woman’s boobs growing to anyone is a bit odd. Imagine if he’d said it about an older woman ‘gosh I’ve noticed aunty jean’s boobs are really sagging and shrinking.’ We would surely think it strange or inappropriate.

Round here when there's the slightest bit of sun, the young lads walk round tops off, in shorts. I've never struggled to avoid perving at them, or commenting to others about them. I've seen drunk young lads passed out at the station, never felt the need to assault them.

The issue isn't what the children are wearing. It's the failure of men like you to control yourselves. If you can't, you should stay inside for the safety of the community - take some responsibility.

Unless he had his hand on his crotch as he said it, it seems fairly innocent to me.

I think its fine its something ive commented on multiple times about family members especially if I haven't seen them in a while and they look significantly different. I don't think its fair only women can comment on these changes sometimes its a bit of a shock as they are not this little girl anymore.

And which was it?

I read it more as him feeling a bit uncomfortable about it himself and maybe checking whether you felt the same.

Parents are responsible to teach their female kids propriety, nice clothing, moderation and respect to others by how they show up

Maybe the men should learn propriety? Just a thought.

Absolutely.

I think it's strange so many pp on the thread think it's normal for a man to comment on his teenage niece's breasts, and think it's normal for him to be ogling them!

I wouldn't be happy OP that he is viewing his niece in a sexual way and I wouldn't be happy about him talking about her in that way

Obscene? Really?

Women aren't responsible for mens behaviour, children are especially not responsible for the behaviour of adult men.

If your DH said "time flies, Freya is so grown up now" it would be ok.
V
Commenting on her boobs - not ok.

I’d imagine your niece would have felt pretty disgusted and upset if she’d heard him comment.

I disagree with the previous posters; that would make me feel quite uncomfortable. If there was really a need to comment, he could have said how grown up she looks seemingly overnight, and that it came as a shock to him because he still thinks of her as a young child. But I don’t think that there is ever any need for any adult male to comment on the breasts of a 16 yr old child, irrespective of the style of her clothing. To say she had her ‘boobs out’ makes me feel very uncomfortable.

I wouldn't find his comment weird. My partner and I both find it weird how our 9 year old is growing boobs when she was only a baby so recently.

Keep deleting sensible comments. What are men supposed to do if girls are not taught propriety

Its a questionable remark but i feel its just poorly articulated

I still remember dressing it all out as a 15 years old and going to the local village cafe and waiting for gazes😅

What are men allowed to say these days? 15 and 16 years olds having big boobs and dressing them out ...goodness

I think this is a type of comment that is really hard to judge on the internet tbh. I can see why people are saying it's innocent. I can also remember my mum's bf who seemed to notice and comment a lot about my neighbourhood friends 'turning into young women' and it was the way he commented, and repeating the remarks about particular girls, that came across really creepy and it was obvious he was staring at their tits. One neighbour ended up lamping him.

If it's a one off I'd probably let it pass - like others have said it might just be a bit of an initial shock - but if he keeps going on about it I'd be more worried.