Feeling awful about son's accident in the pool

You thought you were doing your best. You'd bought what you thought was good safety equipment. You were in the pool with him. What you have learned today is that when it comes to small children and water, arm's length and eyes on. And you have learned it in a manner that your child has recovered faster than you. Lots of cuddles definitely needed tonight.

I've had the same happen. The vests are for certain weight brackets (not always made clear!) and DD1 was just too light.

Teach them in a puddle with the mutts!!

DS is doing his after Christmas once he has turned 8, it's not life-saving, it's the one where they wear pyjamas in the pool and rescue a rubber brick from the bottom at that age 😂, massive over statement from the PP, mother of hasselhof junior

Don’t point out the obvious fact that some children are disadvantaged. They won’t understand. 😅
Swimming lessons are not cheap.

Gotta be the weird flex of the day

Hugs to you OP. What a fright you must have got. DS will forget about it in time and you'll feel better once you've done something proactive about it.

Please don't panic OP. He's absolutely fine and you were there and supervising.

Time to research what floatation aids are better. I believe arm bands as that keeps their head out of the water.

Some lessons when you get home and maybe some regular family trips to the pool to build confidence. It can take years to learn so don't stress too much.

Out of interest can your DD swim too? What floatation aids did she have? And when were her lessons.

It's difficult juggling two kids but personally I wouldn't prioritise dance over a life skills. Both need equal activity time.

Most of the people who have died from accidental drowning were good swimmers.

You are not the first person to take your eye off for a few seconds.

All 3 year olds can swim and an 8 year old has completed his lifeguard training?

OP, be kind to yourself. Children do things which scare us as parents, you aren’t the worst mother in the world, it was seconds and you rescued him and had him checked over and comforted him. He is fine.

swimming lessons are a great idea, especially if you go on pool/beach holidays. But you always have to have an eye on them, even when they can swim.

OP, the guilt creeping up randomly and smacking you round the head is really awful but at least you can channel it into action (and are doing so). My son leaned over the edge of a pool and toppled in when he was about 18mths - I was right next to him but didn't catch him in time - and I cried for bloody ages afterwards. He was in for seconds (it shocked him rather than anything else) but it's a glimpse into a horrendous possibility that you'll now be better equipped to prevent.

He won't remember it. You were right beside him and got to him almost instantly. Getting back in the water with him will help you recover from the shock.

My DD, slightly older, was splashing about in a pool wearing an inflatable ring. Water up to her thighs. She slipped and next second was being held upside down by the ring. (My DH leapt off a sun-lounger, still with shoes on, into the pool.) She has no memory other than it is a family holiday story.

And those who cannot afford swimming lessons, and where the waiting lists are multiple years long?

OP give yourself a break. He’s fine. You were not far away and while you got a massive fright he was never in real danger as you were there to reach him. It’s not your fault the vest was an awful design.

He will absolutely forget it.

Sorry, am I misunderstanding - are you saying that most 3-yr olds can swim?

It’s over now. Thankfully it was a few seconds. I would still bring him for a checkup. He probably didn’t inhale much but secondary drowning is a risk when little ones go under. I doubt he was under long enough.

Omg.

At that age he really should know how to swim … or at the very least how to float .

You should get this sorted asap.

This could have happened to anyone. We all have accidents. Nobody has been harmed.
I don’t use those life vests on my three. I keep toddlers hand or keep him in my arms. I think the life vest style things give a false sense of security.

Just to say 🤗 i can totally imagine how you are feeling. You’re doing your best and sometimes this sort of thing happens and we learn. Please don’t keep beating yourself up

Really??! 🙄🧐

I’d look into private 121 lessons if you can, they’re amazing and really accelerate the learning. Floating on their backs without armbands is one of the first things they learn ❤️

Life vests are not a substitute for proper supervision and water safety.
Teach h to float on his back.
And an adult should be watching non swimmers at all times.