Wether its his own fault or not its still a very serious condtition
It very nearly killed my son its not some thing to take lightly.

It may be life threatening but it’s his own choice, done to manipulate those around him. Obviously dad isn’t so laidback about his shit school performance so he’s had to do this.

I would stay, not because your adult daughter is having a little strop but because your child is getting the medical attention he needs and has his other parent with him.

I do feel sorry for him though. He is 18 and has clearly had to learn to deal with his diabetes at the same time that he has been going through teenage years, so a tough time. It’s a hard thing to do at any time but when all your mates are able to eat and drink what they want and are not tied to a medical regime it is very hard, and it is not uncommon for young diabetics to get rebellious about their enforced lifestyle and for that to spill out into other areas of their lives.

Dd has her own child now. She needs to grow up and stop talking about favouritism.

Her child and partner are also on the holiday. I'm shocked posters think she's in the right.

And he is in the hospital being treated by the medical professionals.

He is an adult who gets to control his own care and can block his mum and dad from getting any information.

Op can’t actually do anything other than if he allows sit and hold his hand.

In your situation I would also want to leave (my DS has T1). Your son clearly needs a lot of support. I assume many posters saying they would stay don't know that DKA is life-threatening. I actually think your daughter is out of order and very immature. She didn't grow up with him as T1, does she fully appreciate what life is like for him? Maybe he's acting selfishly but it's a cry for help. Your daughter is equally selfish.

Yeah, but he's in hospital and his father.Is there.

And. It. Is. His. Own. Fault.

Done on purpose to distract from his awful school performance, failing love life, and seemingly because he’s jealous of his mum spending time with his sister.

DkA is a genuine emergemcy its life threatening .

I don't worry about my other 2 as much as they don't give me any reason to worry!!

I didn't give my mother any reason to worry either. But my sister gave her plenty both in childhood and adulthood.

It didn't mean I didn't need my mother to worry about me. It didn't mean that I didn't want her to show as if she was worried about me and concerned about me. It didn't mean I didn't need help or guidance. Just because I wasn't needing mental health support constantly screwing my life up the way my sister was.

The resentment has carried on well into adulthood. And I still feel the unfair treatment after my mother's death.

If that's how you want your daughter to feel too, then go right ahead.

Give it 24 hours and talk to him on the phone. Ask him if he would like you to come back early or if he is OK with seeing you next week. If he says mum please come then go. Yes you deserve a holiday, but you'll spend the whole time worrying. Your DD has her partner and child with her, they'll be fine (even if they lose a bit of free granny childcare). Your son is clearly struggling.

The son is manipulating the situation and his diabetes for attention.

Seriously, scraping the barrel now.

Who's to say she didn't get attention and guidance? I'm well able to give my adult DC the same while being the mother of a T1D teenager.

She has a Mum who goes on holiday with her and her partner so they obviously have a close relationship. Unlikely her Mum has neglected her in that case. She sounds very spoilt and immature, especially being a mother herself.

I bet it is down to the DD wanting childcare.

She's the one trying to control her mother in being 'furious' at her for wanting to go to home to her son who's in hospital with a serious medical condition!

She was 19. And how many times on here do people say about how often uni aged offspring need guidance and attention

He’s done this twice now. OP is with DD, and he puts himself in hospital intentionally.

Oh please.

If the DS was diagnosed at 13, that was 5 years ago when the DD was 20 if she's 25 now. Already an adult herself.

So his diagnosis didn't affect her getting less attention while she was growing up and as an adult she should have well been able to understand the seriousness of T1D and in fact help out herself to take some of the load from her parents. My adult DCs have DS's glucose readings on their phones and even ring me from holidays if they see he's gone low!

We see keeping an eye on him as a group effort as we know how hard it is to cope with.

I'm with the others who say to stay with your DD. Concentrate on her and your GD now - your DS is in hospital with his dad around. There's not a lot you can do care-wise. I'd imagine he will need you more when you're back and he's out of hospital.
Call him regularly, maybe he will find it easier to talk to you if you're not actually there in person.

Why would it wreck the relationship with another child ? DD is old enough to appreciate that her brother has a serious, chronic and potentially life threatening condition. And old enough to realise that that warrants extra vigilance by their parents - if she’s reading it as being a signal that she’s less of a priority or that her parents somehow love her brother more, then she needs to grow up. I simply don’t understand the general MN mindset that if one child has a disability, the other is entitled to be envious of the demands that places on the parents.

Yes actually it is entirely his fault. He’s done it before and he’ll do it again. Imagine if the post was about a partner who did this?

DKA is life threatening. And the attention seeking is a cry for help.

But you’re not challenging the OP, you’re challenging this poster.

@FairKoala of course alcohol and sweets without insulin can do that but just because that’s what your ex did doesn’t mean it’s the only reason which you implied. My son’s type 1 is extremely well managed but DKA is always a risk should he get a tummy bug, his pump fails, have an accident. Type 1 is highly complex and you completely minimised the seriousness of DKA because your ex didn’t manage it. You can manage type 1 well and still go into DKA so no you don’t know what you are talking about.

Stay. He’s attention seeking.

I would be on the 1st plane home if this was my T1D DS.

The OP's DS has had a life threatening medical emergency and is in hospital. 'Self inflicted' (which is even more worrying) or not. I would be there ASAP as his mother. Even if he didn't want me there, I would know I was there instead of enjoying myself on holiday, although I wouldn't enjoy it anyway and I'd be more stressed out being far away.

The DD is away with her partner and child - is she pissed off because she wants you to have the baby so they can have some time alone OP?

She is well old enough to understand that a sibling with a life threatening chronic medical condition is going to get more focus and attention and she needs to get over it!

My older DC have pulled this on me and they understand now that being lucky enough not to have to live with this absolutely shit condition is not something they need to be jealous of!

My DS was diagnosed at 12 and is now 16. It's only over the last year that the MH effects have hit him. He was very stoic and an absolute trooper before that. The continual being on alert and mental toll is just horrific. Bad enough for parents, let alone the kids. There is most definitely not the MH support available that these kids should be entitled to.

Go home OP so he knows you are there for him, and you do too.

Can you FaceTime with your son on a regular basis rather than stopping your holiday? He has his dad there and is under medical care - he needs to know you care and love him but your presence won’t make any practical difference. Love and care can be accomplished online…