AIBU to question rising private school fees amid declining GCSE results

@Sidedoors - anyone drowning in school fees just isn’t rich enough for independent education and needs to go state. Although if a DC has struggled with SEND or mental health personally I would remortgage and make all sacrifices necessary.

I have 4 DC, we are well off overall but not rich enough for 4 sets of school fees and uni support/driving tests/braces/extra curricular. 4 DC in state school plus uni is already a huge cost with massive tax burden and not much back from state at all despite hard work and bringing up 4 future taxpayers. It is what it is even for those using state, we are also subsidising society at large. Like I said, I donate and help our state schools as much as I can, both time and money. It still doesn’t mean that I don’t want others to have a choice as to how they educate their own DC. I despise nanny stateism for something as fundamental as education. People can choose, caveat emptor.

Eton is at Windsor

Same US unis have such large endowment funds they don’t actually have to charge any fees at all. Most still do, and then it is all bells and whistles.

Thing is the Eton College endowment fund is so large that on a 5 per cent return they could cover 25k per pupil for all their pupils. They choose to spend 65k instead - of course the boarding element itself is very expensive, state boarding is in the range of 20k too now. If it were run just like a state school it would be free to all. So if they can increase their endowment, they might not even have to charge in the future. I suspect this is where most independent schools of the prestige kind want to be heading, free of fees and governmental interference entirely.
So I suspect the prestigious ones will be raising more money, not less. You just need a few billlionaires to feel generous and job done. There is something to be said for elite education open to all though free at the point of delivery.

This.

My son finished school with 10 gcses, 3 good STEM a'levels, happy, confident, polite, optimistic, with a year's experience from a part time job, a reference, savings and a place at a good university.

Our local state schools are not good (not London), so I'm happy that my money was well spent. I wasn't duped either.

I went to state grammar myself but a couple of years independent as my parents were posted abroad. I still get begging letters from the independent, not the state. I think state are only just starting with the alumni outreach network stuff. It costs money and time to tap the alumni network. I can see from my DC’s grammars right now that alumni stuff is becoming more of a thing, it starts with inviting students back to talk to Sixth Formers. I think it is important in state schools as well.
Cambridge uni on the other hand sends a ton of fund raising/donation requests and my college will publish your name if you donate and they ask to be remembered in your will (it is charitable giving).

Yes, our state schools beg for money all the time, including for regular donations if you are able to. You can claim gift aid back on it. It is probably partly why the Labour Government want more affluent families in state, they want you to donate. They cannot balance the books.
I used to give the head teacher at primary a bottle of bubbly and a large box of 43g Pritt glue sticks for Christmas every year.

@Labraradabrador Most independent schools have a fund for something or another. Bursaries, a sponsored brick for a new building, or they just charge you for every extra going! The price you see is rarely what you pay!

Same! Never had a ‘begging letter’ from our Indy, no requests for contributions at all. There is an alumni organisation so presume they will hit the kids up down the line.

state school on the other hand was relentless with requests for cash.

We were asked to donate much more when they were in state primary!

I plan to do this for DS’s school, they’ve basically saved his life and they’re a very small school with small fees and I would like to either leave them something in or Will or donate when we can.

I now wonder if OPs has a child at a private school at all. She seems incredibly passive about doing anything despite being so cross with the school. Is asking people to provide examples of ‘begging letters’ without providing examples of any she claims to gave been inundated with. Seems terribly uninformed about how the finances of private schools work, especially endowments, despite being so cross about it. Doesn’t seem to get the idea of people judging themselves whether it is value for money for their own child. Seems keen to try and drum up resentment amongst others even once their kids get to university...

Plus of course the idea that private schools outside London don’t have wealthy pupils/parents - that would include schools like Oundle, Fettes College, Gordonstoun, Winchester College, Cheltenham Ladies College…

@Sidedoors I don’t think you know much about private schools. This is all hearsay.

In case you didn’t know, schools research the wealth of parents and invite them to join “inner circle” type events to relieve them of more money. The Arnold Foundation at Rugby is an example. It’s quite normal to have alumni associations and ask for money from them.

We used schools where we were not continually targeted for money but others most certainly gave huge amounts. Well in three of them. Possibly not in the other one as too many without substantial funds.

Schools have always sent out ‘begging letters’ as do universities. It is also why they make an effort to stay in touch with alumni and invite them to reunions. It is these efforts that help pay for new science blocks, drama studios etc as well a the endowments that pay for burserys/scholarships/prizes. I am surprised you don’t know that.

I am perfectly happy for staff to receive discounts- some of our best teachers have children in school and it is probably a big part of why we have them. It is also probably a lot cheaper than raising salaries - especially if classes or at full capacity so it doesn’t really affect fees as much a you imply.

i am fine with bursaries in general and have no interest in second guessing the school’s decisions- it is a bit distasteful to speculate on other people’s financial hardship. I take the view that my cost/benefit analysis is mine alone and has nothing to do with others at the school weighing up cost/benefit under different parameters. My children are thriving at their private and were really struggling at state, so we will happily pay even if it means working a few more years than I might have otherwise.

There was also a similarly obsessed poster who had a bee in her bonnet about staff receiving discounts and their children taking all the best parts in the school plays and so on and so on. If they are different posters (which I doubt), I would recommend all of them having the courage to leave the private education sector and to enjoy the state system. Spend your money how you choose: handbags, holidays or education. It’s your money - but don’t try to make yourself feel better by tearing others down so their choices match yours and you don’t feel like you’re missing out.

You keep on bringing up this point 'its exceptionally important to do due diligence' and this whole thread is 'people need to know'... hate to break it to you OP - most people here DID do their due diligence and are happy with their choice of private for their child, whether scrimping or not scrimping at all. What it sounds like is that YOU didnt do YOUR due diligence and now can't get over it nor do you want to do anything actionable about it for your child.

I'm intrigued that OP is on all sort of whatsapp groups with complaining parents at tons of provincial private schools and her child is 2....