AIBU to think a 10pm bedtime and 6am start is relatively normal in your 40s?

For most of my life I've gone to bed whenever, though on the earlier side, and got up at 6.00.a.m. or earlier to mark pupils' work. I felt calm and neutral then, nothing had happened to piss me off.
It's only changed recently. Now in my 70s I need the light to motivate me, and have to sleep with curtains open. It's getting to spring here in Melbourne, so the mornings are fab.
My late DH wasn't as late to bed or quite as early to rise as me, but we synched well.

During the week, bed 10/10.30, up around 7am (usually awake before my 7am alarm goes off). Weekends and holidays, I'll stay up as late as I want/need, and wake up at whatever time that naturally happens.

I think what you do is absolutely fine, as long as you're not restricting your social plans or activities at weekends by blindly sticking to an unneccessarily rigid bed 9.30 up at 6 routine.

It is way to early for me, I wouldn’t be able to sleep and it wouldn’t feel like I’d had much of an evening with DH if if I went to bed at that time. Thankfully we’re both a bit similar. But I don’t think there’s any right or wrong in it. Sounds about right that he is an ex!

I wake up naturally 6.30/7am and go to bed about 11, sleep by midnight.

I don't know what friends do but I suspect similar to you given the time texting stops. I don't understand how you have any type of evening, what time do you get home from work?

Everyone needs sufficient rest so if getting up time is fixed bedtime has to be adjusted to suit. I obviously don't need much sleep.

Urgh he sounds like a complete bellend if he literally cannot imagine someone having a different time schedule to him. The world doesnt revolve around him and his habits.

I go to bed and get up at the same time as you, OP, and it's completely normal in my social circle (most of us go to the gym early before work). The gym is always full of people that early so it cant be that "unusual" 🙄

Glad he’s your ex! He sounds like an overbearing bellend!!

This reminds me of the Hozier song Too Sweet! So I am 45 and the best bedtime for me is 10.30pm and I get up around 6.30 as at work for 8

I do this as well. The rest of the house is still in bed, while I’m up doing my own thing.

I think YABU to say going to bed ‘early’ (and 10.00pm isn’t early in my books…) is living like a nun. Or that one should ‘lighten up’ and go to bed later.
Or that going to bed late is living like a teenager.

If you need that much sleep, you do.
If someone needs less sleep, they do.
Why trying to fit your own physiology and sleep needs into a nice little box just to ‘look like the norm’, whatever that norm is?

fwiw, the most important of sleep is deep sleep. This happens at the start of the night and going to be early (at least asleep before midnight) helps with that….

9.30pm would be an early (ish) night for me (I’m 62 and still work FT). We’re usually upstairs in bed between 10-10.30 and asleep before 11pm. My alarm goes off anywhere between 5.30-6.30am depending on if it’s a WFH day or office day. I do feel it though if I’m not asleep until 11pm and up at 5.30am - 6.5 hrs is not really enough.

I agree. People have different routines and requirements. I don't think age is particularly relevant.

He sounds like a twat.
well rid.

"all those 90s / noughties processed diet substitutes have been proven to make one fatter anyway. "

Not true. The evidence isn't conclusive about diet drinks and skimmed milk is not a 'processed diet substitute'.

Oh dear. There are advantages to both whole and skimmed, but it's not terrible for you and doesn't make you fat!

I go to bed later and get up a bit later but loads of people I know in their 40s do similar to what you describe

He sounds insufferable.

And wrong, by the way - all those 90s / noughties processed diet substitutes have been proven to make one fatter anyway. Your way is probably the reason you aren’t fat in the first place.

Regardless. People keep different hours. No such thing as ‘normal’. I’m your age and love a lie-in. Never occured to me to pay attention to what others do, i do what works for me.

A relationship with someone who doesn’t keep the same times as you will never work so it doesn’t matter, I can’t go to bed that early as I’d have 0 child free time but if it works for you who cares?

Sounds fine to me. I go to bed late, but I don’t usually wake up before about 8.

late thirties here, in winter we go to bed to watch tv or read a book as early as 8.30pm! Then would go to sleep around 10pm, 6am wake up time for both of us. I need 8h of sleep!

When working it was bed no later than 10, straight to sleep and.up at 5.30. Pleased to note he is an ex. Curious why skimmed milk makes you fat.

Personally if I went to bed that early I’d be awake in the early hours and just going back to sleep when the alarm goes off. I also don’t get up early if I don’t have to, I am not sure if you meant that you keep to the 6am get up at weekends or just the rest of your working week but 6am at weekends sounds crazy to me. So not normal for me in my 40s, I go to bed between 11-12 and get up at 7.30 on wfh days or 6.30 on office days and around 8.30/9 at the weekend.

Bedtime largely extent dictated by work schedule, surely? I think it’s a daft comment from him. My natural inclination would be to sleep and rise late but it just doesn’t fit with my job. I do have a different pattern depending on whether I’m going into the office but everything I’ve heard about sleep hygiene says you should stick to a routine, so you’re doing it the right way!

9:30 is on the early side I think, it is definitely too early for me. If I am in bed more than 8 hours, I feel worse the next day.
I also play netball and some of my matches start at half 9 (mid week)

However,my husband has started to retreat to bed around half 9, though he is up earlier than me. We rarely go to bed at the same time mid week as we have different sleep needs.