Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to overthink this after argument?

39 replies

aray1996 · 23/08/2026 02:39

Hey everyone. The other night me and my partner had a huge argument In my house. It escalated really badly. He was screaming at me and I was screaming at him. It’s a long story on why it happened and something silly aswell. I basically wanted to go to a karaoke night on Thursday but he said he had no money then I said I felt like it’s always me who makes plans and we never do much etc. and then he said it made him feel bad. But it escalated and I was drunk also and this was about 2.40am in the morning and I was drunk and I stupidly (please no judgement) said how about I kill myself to see if he even cares about me. (Really immature and stupid I know) he then stormed out of my house and drove home. We then never spoke until I got a text around 7.30am saying “I’m coming to get my bag” he then came round and collected his clothes but he was in the same clothes he was wearing when he left mine.. so I text him after and said how come ur still in the same clothes. And in the afternoon he text me back and said he never slept a wink and didn’t go to bed and lay on the sofa because he was worried about me. I then asked him was he away somewhere, am I being silly in this instance? We are ok now we made up etc and realised our wrong doings. Before anybody comes at me I know it was not nice what I said and I regret it highly.

OP posts:
McSpoot · 23/08/2026 09:28

PrayForPlagues · 23/08/2026 09:27

I hope your partner has a good support system in his life. If a man was treating a woman the way you treat your partner we’d all be telling her to end the relationship pronto. Getting drunk, screaming at him because he can’t afford a night out, baseless accusations of cheating - all domestic abuse.

Add being "too stubborn" to immediately make up.

PrayForPlagues · 23/08/2026 09:27

I hope your partner has a good support system in his life. If a man was treating a woman the way you treat your partner we’d all be telling her to end the relationship pronto. Getting drunk, screaming at him because he can’t afford a night out, baseless accusations of cheating - all domestic abuse.

McSpoot · 23/08/2026 09:27

aray1996 · 23/08/2026 09:25

He was bein stubborn and wouldn’t make up with me and he shouted to when we where fighting etc

I wouldn't be quick to make up with some who first threatened suicide and then accused me of cheating. Do you really think that you have equal need to learn from what you did?

aray1996 · 23/08/2026 09:25

McSpoot · 23/08/2026 09:24

I ask, again, what were his wrongs that you say that he realised? You have stupid thoughts is not one of his wrongs.

We are ok now we made up etc and realised our wrong doings.

He was bein stubborn and wouldn’t make up with me and he shouted to when we where fighting etc

OP posts:
McSpoot · 23/08/2026 09:24

aray1996 · 23/08/2026 09:19

I was over thinking stupidly that he was that annoyed he went to a women’s house lol

I ask, again, what were his wrongs that you say that he realised? You have stupid thoughts is not one of his wrongs.

We are ok now we made up etc and realised our wrong doings.

ALovelyPinkUnicorn · 23/08/2026 09:23

aray1996 · 23/08/2026 09:19

I was over thinking stupidly that he was that annoyed he went to a women’s house lol

“LOL” in this situation?

Wish44 · 23/08/2026 09:22

Why would you need to threaten to kill yourself to see if he cares about you?

for the sake of your future and all your future relationships please explore this in therapy.

aray1996 · 23/08/2026 09:20

Motnight · 23/08/2026 09:20

I assume as Op's partner drove home he hadn't been drinking alcohol?

He never. It was just me

OP posts:
Motnight · 23/08/2026 09:20

19lottie82 · 23/08/2026 03:18

I think you both need to lay off the booze

I assume as Op's partner drove home he hadn't been drinking alcohol?

aray1996 · 23/08/2026 09:19

McSpoot · 23/08/2026 02:42

What were his wrong doings?

I was over thinking stupidly that he was that annoyed he went to a women’s house lol

OP posts:
aray1996 · 23/08/2026 09:18

19lottie82 · 23/08/2026 03:18

I think you both need to lay off the booze

Very true

OP posts:
19lottie82 · 23/08/2026 03:18

I think you both need to lay off the booze

BibbityBoppityTwo · 23/08/2026 02:45

You’ve got much bigger problems than why your partner was still in the same clothes.

But of course he was probably up worrying. You threatened to kill yourself. That’s controlling and abusive, which you obviously know. But the two of you need to do serious work on how you communicate because if you don’t this will not be the last of it.

McSpoot · 23/08/2026 02:42

What were his wrong doings?

Swipe left for the next trending thread