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AIBU?

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AIBU to be angry about comments on my granddaughters' names?

508 replies

Ellenay · 21/08/2026 17:59

So, I have 5 grandchildren, this weekend I’m looking after all of them, my daughter and her husband are away to a wedding in France and my son and his wife have booked a little spa weekend.

I popped in to see some of my friends with them as I don’t often have the children and my friends like seeing them.

One of my friends had some other friends I’ve not met before over but we joined them. After introducing the children and then being sent to the kitchen to get a lollipop, one of these friends said oh don’t all the girls have little showgirl names, I must have looked a bit shocked as someone else then jumped in and said oh she doesn’t mean p*rnstar just very moulin rouge.

I just said I thought their names were lovely and moved on but now I’m back home I’m furious, I’m furious I didn’t give her a piece of my mind.

AIBU to think this is an absurd thing to say about children’s names?!

OP posts:
sheisforrealatiger · 22/08/2026 00:36

TrojanDonkey · 21/08/2026 19:58

Lola and Ruby are very run of the mill girls names these days. But I can see with Roxy how that comment came about. Saying it out loud is something else though.

Edited

“Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl” can’t think who the song is by, but my friend got this response from everyone in her family above a certain age.

OP, I think you’re being overly precious.

avonleabonbon · 22/08/2026 00:31

I thought it was going to be a barely disguised insult, but they ARE quite showgirl/moulin rouge names. And that really isn’t meant as an insult!

Saz12 · 22/08/2026 00:09

I wouldve been pretty grossed out if people thought of my squidgy little newborn / toddler/ 4 year old as a "showgirl" then assumed that saying "no, dint be daft, not a pornstar, more moulin rouge" made it ok.

Theyre just wee children! Assuming name isnt Busty Babs, wtf???

Takingtigermountainbystrategy · 22/08/2026 00:08

I think it's quite normal.to.react to names. My friend's most recent grandchild has been given a real little old lady name and we both had a bit of a laugh about it. My grandchild has a surname for a first name which I really didn't like and it didn't bother me at all when others pointed out it was all a bit Home and Away. Try not to feel.too hurt by it, I know it's because you love them but she probably didn't mean to offend

Drivingmissrangey · 22/08/2026 00:07

Grammarnut · 21/08/2026 22:24

I know a dog called Rolf. Should we not call boys Rolf? This is really silly and one should not compare dogs to children.

Not sure anyone is naming their kid Rolf nowadays…

Drivingmissrangey · 22/08/2026 00:04

A showgirl is a female dancer or singer who performs in a theatrical revue, variety show, or musical. They are famous for wearing elaborate, glamorous, and revealing costumes featuring feathers, sequins, and heavy headdresses, and in some traditional venues may perform topless

Aka an exotic dancer at best, stripper at worst.

OP I agree it was a pretty awful comment.

keepcounsel · 22/08/2026 00:01

I think it's really rude to comment on someone's name other than to say what a lovely name. It's their name by now, someone isn't going to change it, just feel irked or uncomfortable.

PleaseStopEatingMyStuff · 21/08/2026 23:53

Perhaps she didn't mean "show girl" in a negative way. Id assume she ment theatrical.
A couple of the names are names common in theatre.

Bellabeth80 · 21/08/2026 23:51

Calliopespa · 21/08/2026 23:20

There are so many snarky posts lately.

I know. It’s so unnecessary!

MaidOfSteel · 21/08/2026 23:50

Ellenay · 21/08/2026 18:04

One of these names is correct.
Im not sure it really matters what they are called though?

I don’t think it’s a nice comment to make about little girls.

It wasn’t a comment about little girls, though. It was a comment about names.

You know this kind of thing goes on all the time since names have become much less formal. Your shock is not understandable.

paddleboardingmum · 21/08/2026 23:37

YANBU she was needlessly rude and should have kept her thoughts to herself.

RafaFan · 21/08/2026 23:32

Iocanepowder · 21/08/2026 22:16

No one said these kids don’t have value.

The dog called a Ruby is a fact. Silly to choose to be offended.

Too much sensitivity on here. One of op’s granddaughter’s names is a song about a showgirl. Lighten up and have a laugh.

I think the point is that it appears that if one fictional character has the name, every real person with the name has to be the butt of stupid comments.

If the grandchildren were named Theresa, Katherine and Mary-Francis would the woman have said something about nuns? Probably not, because nuns aren't perceived in the same way as showgirls.

RafaFan · 21/08/2026 23:24

EstoyRobandoSuCasa · 21/08/2026 22:36

Within those four, you've got both of them!

I'm hoping it's Murray and Kendall!

BusyRascal1 · 21/08/2026 23:22

takealettermsjones · 21/08/2026 18:08

Is it possible that she meant it as a compliment - as in very glamorous, film star sort of names?

That's what I would have assumed. I wouldn't have taken it as insulting at all.

Calliopespa · 21/08/2026 23:20

Bellabeth80 · 21/08/2026 23:13

Comments like this make Mumsnet feel hostile. What’s the point ?

There are so many snarky posts lately.

PestoPastaLife · 21/08/2026 23:15

EstoyRobandoSuCasa · 21/08/2026 22:29

I don't know if it was meant as a neutral observation or a bit of a dig to be honest. But I occasionally notice that siblings' names seem to be following a theme and I think it's often unintentional on the part of the parents.

I've met a pair of siblings seemingly named after cartoon bears, another pair named after mint sweets and a pair of sisters with unusual Shakespearian names (that one was possibly intentional). I did ask the grandmother of the little bears if the name theme was deliberate, but I know her very well and she wasn't offended. Apparently this theme wasn't intentional, but the parents were aware of it.

Edited

Kendall and… Pepper? Humbug? After Eight?

Matchalattecoco · 21/08/2026 23:14

It would’ve annoyed me too tbh regardless whether it was meant in a negative way or not- just feels a bit like sexualising based on a name?
I think the names are really sweet! Ruby was on my names list.

Mapletree1985 · 21/08/2026 23:14

Ellenay · 21/08/2026 18:04

One of these names is correct.
Im not sure it really matters what they are called though?

I don’t think it’s a nice comment to make about little girls.

What's wrong with being a showgirl?

Bellabeth80 · 21/08/2026 23:13

Rizzz · 21/08/2026 18:13

But how is 'showgirl' anything like pretentious or tacky?

Why are you taking it as an insult?

And more importantly if you were so 'furious' why didn't you say anything instead of running home to tell Mumsnet?

Comments like this make Mumsnet feel hostile. What’s the point ?

TalkToTheHand123 · 21/08/2026 23:12

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Flamingojune · 21/08/2026 23:11

Whats your bitchy friends name. I'm sure we can dig up some dirt on that

PestoPastaLife · 21/08/2026 23:10

If I hear the name Lola I start humming “she was a showgirl” without even thinking about it. Roxy makes me think of the musical Chicago = showgirl. Ruby isn’t not a showgirl name although I mostly think of the Kaiser Chiefs song.

But I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a showgirl or having a showgirl type name. Taylor Swift self-identifies as a showgirl and if it’s good enough for her…

Purplebeach · 21/08/2026 23:07

It was a bit crass of her to comment but it was probably one of those moments where she said something she should have just kept as a thought! I’d try to calm down and just brush it off. It’s not worth causing any drama. People have such varied opinions on names. The main thing is your DC and their partner like the names and hopefully the children like their own names! No one else’s opinion matters.

WearyAuldWumman · 21/08/2026 23:04

Lararoft · 21/08/2026 18:26

Their names seem quite normal really, that woman was being bitchy.

Ruby was not an uncommon name when I was at primary school in the '60s. I recall that we had a Ruby and a Pearl in our class.

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