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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to be angry about comments on my granddaughters' names?

508 replies

Ellenay · 21/08/2026 17:59

So, I have 5 grandchildren, this weekend I’m looking after all of them, my daughter and her husband are away to a wedding in France and my son and his wife have booked a little spa weekend.

I popped in to see some of my friends with them as I don’t often have the children and my friends like seeing them.

One of my friends had some other friends I’ve not met before over but we joined them. After introducing the children and then being sent to the kitchen to get a lollipop, one of these friends said oh don’t all the girls have little showgirl names, I must have looked a bit shocked as someone else then jumped in and said oh she doesn’t mean p*rnstar just very moulin rouge.

I just said I thought their names were lovely and moved on but now I’m back home I’m furious, I’m furious I didn’t give her a piece of my mind.

AIBU to think this is an absurd thing to say about children’s names?!

OP posts:
IsItWickedNotToCare · 21/08/2026 21:40

Fifi trixiebelle

Pennyfan · 21/08/2026 21:39

Shit, now I have Copacabana in my head.

musicandmen · 21/08/2026 21:37

Ellenay · 21/08/2026 18:14

No, not Kitty. I fear this thread is just going to turn into a guessing game of their names instead of actually discussing the woman’s manners so I will share their names.
Lola, Roxy and Ruby.

Show quote history

Her name was Lola she was a show girl
Roxy short for Roxanne- song about a women oof night
ruby - the same

I think if you are from a certain era these names were showgirl names

musicandmen · 21/08/2026 21:35

Whether we like it or not names especially girls names come with pre conceived judgement!!

I remember a friend called her girl her a name and my grandma (in her 80’s) said she must want her to grow up to be a stripper!!

Iocanepowder · 21/08/2026 21:33

Op that woman won’t be the first to make that association.

As I said, 2 early posters on this thread correctly guessed Roxy and Lola before you confirmed the names.

Sorry but I think you’re overthinking this and are being a bit too defensive.

Hellohelga · 21/08/2026 21:29

I think they were very rude to say anything other than…what lovely names.

Hanksness · 21/08/2026 21:24

They were very rude.
No filter.
Ignorant.
Yanbu.

Summernites · 21/08/2026 21:22

Lola was a showgirl, Roxy Hart in Chicago, obvs not a showgirl but very theatrical. Roxanne song used in Moulin Rouge, Ruby a gem - I always associate things and to others it is probably totally random. It might have popped into my head and said it but I think they’re cute, it wouldn’t be an insult. Taylor Swift, Sabrina Carpenter doing the showgirl thing just now. Don’t see why it’s a bad thing. If she meant it insulting she was a bitch.

cariadlet · 21/08/2026 21:21

Individually, most people wouldn't think twice about any of those names but, as a trio, they do give off a certain vibe so I understand why the thought came into the friend of a friend's head.

It would definitely have been better for her to have kept the thoughts to herself but at least she waited until the children were in another room before saying anything.

I don't think she meant to upset you. She might have assumed that you had noticed the same thing. When she realised that you were offended, she backtracked and tried to get out of the hole that she'd dug for herself.

btw, op, I do realise that I've implicitly criticised the names and that you get very huffy with anyone on the thread who comments on the actual names but when someone starts a Mumsnet thread, they don't get to control how others comment on it.

VioletSeagull · 21/08/2026 21:21

HollyhocksandPeons · 21/08/2026 20:01

They are lovely names with strong connections to literature - 'these are my lilies and this is my Lola', 'Your letters brought me here, my love' and the lovely young girl, granddaughter of the Squire! Stupid cow, that woman!

Show quote history

"'That was my Lo,' she said, 'and these are my lilies.'"

Though she was Lola in slacks.

TheSquareMile · 21/08/2026 21:20

I don't think that what she said was ill-intentioned.

I'm pretty sure that 'Lola' prompted her to remember the Barry Manilow song and the word 'showgirl'.

'Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl.....'.

'Roxie', she would know from 'Chicago'.

'Ruby' is from a song/songs.

I think that she was remarking that all the names seemed to have musical connections and chose perhaps the wrong word.

I wouldn't give it any more thought.

Papyrophile · 21/08/2026 21:12

The Kinks, Lola, is one of the all time great songs. The first single I ever bought. Still fresh as paint, and a total classic.

Gonners · 21/08/2026 21:11

Showing my age here, Lola only reminds me of The Kinks song from 1970.

Livelovebehappy · 21/08/2026 21:08

Doesn’t sound like she was purposefully being rude, just maybe a bit clumsy with her words. Although, as you don’t know her, you can’t really make a judgement on whether she has form for being rude.

Dishwashersforever · 21/08/2026 21:05

Solobanana · 21/08/2026 20:58

It’s because of roxanne- by Police (Roxy) and copacabana by manilow- her name was Lola… Showgirls. It’s definitely a generational knowledge of the songs….

Roxane is also a strong woman in the classic Cyrano de Begerac . Written well before the police song. I think it’s a beautiful name and it’s a shame that the song is given it this connotation . L

Papyrophile · 21/08/2026 21:05

I can't be bovvered. Personally, I'm not a fan but if your family loves 'em, I will not argue.

Emeraldforest · 21/08/2026 21:03

They have great names, although I was secretly hoping for Dita! (Not that Dita von Teese isn't an elegant and lovely woman)

namechange6766333545544 · 21/08/2026 20:59

I don’t think it was rude of her to say that. Nothing wrong with show girls.

Bookloveruk · 21/08/2026 20:59

Ellenay · 21/08/2026 18:14

No, not Kitty. I fear this thread is just going to turn into a guessing game of their names instead of actually discussing the woman’s manners so I will share their names.
Lola, Roxy and Ruby.

Show quote history

I think they are lovely names and adult saying this shows their mentality. Enjoy spending time with your grandchildren and I’m sure they will love being with you

Solobanana · 21/08/2026 20:58

It’s because of roxanne- by Police (Roxy) and copacabana by manilow- her name was Lola… Showgirls. It’s definitely a generational knowledge of the songs….

LBFseBrom · 21/08/2026 20:56

nomorekitchenislandsplease · 21/08/2026 18:02

The names just reminded her of something. Not particularly rude especially as tge children didn't hear the comment.

Yes, I think so too.

lalalagarden · 21/08/2026 20:55

Oh come on, the woman was meaning they sounded like strippers! Not nice at all

Thepossibility · 21/08/2026 20:55

I don't think it's meant to be insulting? Are you getting showgirl and stripper mixed up? My friend was a showgirl in her younger years before kids and she was a very talented, trained dancer.

likeafishneedsabike · 21/08/2026 20:55

Becuriousnotjudgemental1980 · 21/08/2026 18:24

That’s a bit weird. Although, one of the kids on our street is called Lola and the only other Lola I’ve known was a stripper. So I guess it’s what your mind associates names with.

The Lola I know is an extremely shy and studious 16 year old why just got 9 A* at GCSE. No showgirl career for her it seems.
It’s the combination that’s showgirly than the individual names, I reckon.

whiteroseredrose · 21/08/2026 20:53

It was a rude and sneery comment. And inappropriate. I would have been cross too.

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