AIBU to be devastated at my ex claiming CB to block me receiving it. I'm on UC he earns 120k+

You need to claim child benefit to get NI credits, even if it needs to be paid - or you register for it but don’t take the money. This is no good for you now however.

So basically you now have no qualifying years for state pension affecting your old age, and you are losing money for your child in the here and now - unsure if you get your NI credits on UC, but if not then he’s continuing to also affect your retirement security.

im staggered he can get away with this, no advice but I hope other posters have some and I hope it is resolved for you. You’re asking for what you’re entitled to whereas he’s being vindictive and depriving your child.

This might sound OTT but he’s an evil bastard.

Do you work now? If not get a job.

Not that this is any help but long runs the fox. Your child will eventually see him for what he is. A disgusting excuse for a man. He'd rather see his child suffer to be spiteful to you, they'll figure that out soon enough. His new wife should also pay heed to how he is.
I hope you can get this sorted, sounds like he knew what he was doing all along. Best of luck to your and your child.

Christ, this really is one of the most awful things I've read on here. What a monster he is.

So, work on getting that house sold ASAP. Your solicitor will advise on how to get the most percentage you can.

Make your CB claim - and ask for a reconsideration. They will investigate and decide who get its. Salary doesn’t come into that though - it does not matter who earns what or if he cannot actually keep the money. All that matters is care of the children. Who provides most for them, who deals with doctors and school and all of those sorts of things. It isn’t just about physical nights at his or yours. Get as much evidence as you can that you handle their day to day organising or their lives etc.

And, you have to go back to work. You weren’t married, so you’re not getting anything beyond what comes from the house. You have no pension and won’t get a share of his like in a divorce and no split of the money in bank accounts. You need to go back to work, and pay for childcare for your days. That’s just the way it is now.

Have you applied to Child Benefit and given them proof that you have a true 50/50 set up?

Because in that circumstance if they agree it is a genuine 50/50 they should pay it to the parent where the child will benefit most - which when one can have payment and one cannot is always the one that can have.

If you have applied have they confirmed they see that you have 50/50? The only reason to leave it with him is if they see him as the resident parent as he has the children more or does more.

What a nasty little man. Please get proper advice from the authorities.

You can apply for the NI contributions to be transferred to you, as you were together.
Have you actually claimed Child Benefit and been disallowed?
If yes, request a Mandatory Reconsideration and claim again.

Just to clarify... you were not married but still invested in a home together, right?
You can definitely a ask for the decision to be formally reconsidered/appealed, explaining the actual care arrangements, that you are now separated and have court ordered 50/50 care.

It may not lead anywhere, but worth a shot.

I am so sorry, this is my absolute worst nightmare and why I refuse to have children outside of marriage. Seen it happen to too many women. It does sound to be like he is trying to financially control/abuse you now.

Why would you tell the op to engage a solicitor in an almost certainly fruitlessly endeavor and I've more costs.

Unless the solicitor is providing multiples of the favors MM free half hours it's just going to hurt her financially.

You gave up work and became a SAHM without the protection of marriage?

Some questions so we can see where you stand -
Did you have your own savings account which he paid into, so you had your own money and weren’t disadvantaged by not working? Or have you got nothing?

Did he pay into a pension for you, or make voluntary NI contributions to protect your state pension?

Why didn’t you claim the CB for the NI credits but tick the box saying “no payment”?

You said you put all your money into the house - is your name on the deeds, so it’s being sold, or he is buying you out so you can get your money back? Or is the house solely is and without being married, you can’t get your money out of it?

She's talking about Child Benefit not child maintenance. Her wealthy husband is claiming it and then paying it back to prevent OP claiming it.

Go back to your solicitor and claim spousal maintenance because you are a SAHM and support for the children because their standard of living is so much lower in your household. He has declared war on you.

Your local MP is the one to contact in the first instance.

Child benefit is however separate to child maintenance. OP needs to get CB transferred at least for one child to claim any missing NI full years credit payments otherwise any years or part years at home as unpaid child carer won't count towards the 35 years full years contributions needed for a full state pension.

I found out when I had just a couple of months unpaid maternity leave those couple of months meant I didn't have 12 months worth of contribution for that year even I was on quite a good salary and paid in far more than the minimum annual NI contribution for the relevant year.

My friend and her ex did 50/50 the child benefit was split 50/50 too

Ring CMS as soon as possible.

CMS Payment Calculator UK 2025/26
Hope this helps.

It can happen through court when one is a very high earner (in legal terms, not what generally seems like a lot. Think footballer and cleaner as parents, or CEO and admin assistant).

It’s often done through an initial divorce.

I have heard some people can claim CMS even though they are both doing 50/50. Not sure how though.

How old is your DC? Who pays for activities? Clothes, shoes and holidays?

Do you have more than one child or just the one?