Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to refuse extra in-laws and children at our wedding?

38 replies

Stuclandconfused · 21/08/2026 14:24

Getting married in four weeks.

Brother1’s and Sister’s kids are bridesmaids, apart from our son, they are only kids. Partner doesn’t have nieces or nephews.

My dad gave us £10,000 with no strings but asked if we could invite siblings’ in-laws so they could see grandkids in their finery.

No problem!

NOW MiL wants partner’s brother’s in-laws invited in case they think we’re homophobic. We’re not!

AND Brother2’s partner of 15 months wants her parents and her two kids invited, two kids I have met twice.

We’re saying no to both!

6 extra that we don’t know and two kids at our child free ish wedding. These kids have their own father.

Brother2 not even living with her.

OP posts:
IPM · 21/08/2026 14:38

Lol @ the 10k coming with no strings but then very much coming with strings.

MellowSubmarine · 21/08/2026 14:36

Sorry, have I got this right, a woman who has been dating her boyfriend for 15 months would like her parents to be invited to her boyfriend’s sibling’s wedding?
On what planet is that a normal expectation?

BeetleBu · 21/08/2026 14:36

Does brother2 live with his girlfriend and her kids?

Supportbritishfarmers · 21/08/2026 14:35

If it's a church wedding it's an open invitation anyway, so I don't see the harm. Inviting randomers though suggests a paid for place at the reception table - absolutely not!

StressedOutPeanut · 21/08/2026 14:35

Yanbu. They are not your family, they are their family why would you invite them? Also the kids of the girlfriend 15 months isn't a long time what's to say they don't spilt up in a years time?

Original poster
Stuclandconfused · 21/08/2026 14:35

They are not randomers. I have met them reasonably often and their grandkids are attendants.

Brother2’s partner. I hardly know her let alone her parents. I have never met the parents.

OP posts:
Original poster
Stuclandconfused · 21/08/2026 14:32

Brother2 seems embarrassed rather than annoyed.

OP posts:
BeetleBu · 21/08/2026 14:32

YABU for inviting half your siblings’ in-laws and not the other half. If you’re happy having some complete randomers there, I can see why people think it’s an open invite.

Original poster
Stuclandconfused · 21/08/2026 14:32

I don’t have issues with nieces’ other grandparents as I kind of know them and sister’s in-laws have invited us to meals and picked up bill. I think that’s nice that we invite them.

But the others No.

OP posts:
NuffSaidSam · 21/08/2026 14:28

Although I think inviting the other set of distant in-laws is a bit weird!

NuffSaidSam · 21/08/2026 14:28

Although I think inviting the other set of distant in-laws is a bit weird!

Naurrr · 21/08/2026 14:28

so they could see grandkids in their finery.

That's what photos are for. Say no to the random strangers attending your wedding, of course.

NuffSaidSam · 21/08/2026 14:27

YANBU

Stand firm.

Swipe left for the next trending thread