Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to ask what controlling behaviour once seemed normal?

55 replies

Jane143 · 21/08/2026 13:37

Abusive/ weird stuff we thought was almost normal at the time? I’ll start with something I mentioned on a previous thread so as not to derail that one.
my ex used to make me have another shower if I farted at anytime during the evening before we had sex. Also HAD to wear stockings etc. was this normal? Seemed so at the time and I did it all to make him be nice to me.

OP posts:
Rosiecloud · 21/08/2026 13:57

Women needing a man’s permission for a bank account or credit card.

Snufkin88 · 21/08/2026 13:50

Did he have ocd or something. That is really abnormal and don’t think it was ever normal for someone to be like that

Jane143 · 21/08/2026 13:45

HRTQueen · 21/08/2026 13:43

I think a man asking his partners father for her hand in marriage is something we shall look back on and think wtf

But there was a time when woman needed their fathers permission to marry as women were property and it evolved but seems outdated (to me)

Yes that’s very true. It never happens the other way round with the mother in law

OP posts:
HRTQueen · 21/08/2026 13:43

I think a man asking his partners father for her hand in marriage is something we shall look back on and think wtf

But there was a time when woman needed their fathers permission to marry as women were property and it evolved but seems outdated (to me)

Jane143 · 21/08/2026 13:39

Also to clarify I wasn’t allowed to pass wind, but sometimes it comes out unexpectedly. It’s not like I was trumping out loud or anything, I don’t think he ever truly heard me fart in the marriage

OP posts: