Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To increasingly feel like men are more of a hindrance than anything else

189 replies

Windiscrazytoday · 20/08/2026 16:43

They are responsible for so many evils in the world in comparison to females
The females I know are just so much more capable and emotionally stable
I love Dh but often find myself helping him to regulate his emotions or balancing things on days out to keep the mood good for the Dc
My father, I adore, but my mother's life has not been easy with him in many aspects

Is this a peri/late 40's thing?

Feel like I'm seeing how things really are and it isn't great

OP posts:
VestibuleWeaver · 20/08/2026 18:24

Windiscrazytoday · 20/08/2026 18:13

That is fantastic, but this isn't really just about your wonderful husband

Show quote history

What is it about then? Just general man-bashing?

moderate · 20/08/2026 18:19

Windiscrazytoday · 20/08/2026 18:13

That is fantastic, but this isn't really just about your wonderful husband

Show quote history

Why talk about your own husband then?

Original poster
Windiscrazytoday · 20/08/2026 18:13

Clydebuilt · 20/08/2026 17:59

Not in my experience. I chose well, he’s a wonderful man and a wonderful husband, I’m blessed to have him.

That is fantastic, but this isn't really just about your wonderful husband

OP posts:
Theoldwrinkley · 20/08/2026 18:11

Shatteredallthetimelately · 20/08/2026 16:58

I've had far more bad experiences with women than I have with men throughout my life (54 now).

I'd have to agree here.

These so many awful, bitter women out there.

Totally agree. Some women I've met are vile. Some men have not been perfect, but a lot more tolerable than some of the women. I would find life very challenging without my DH.

INX · 20/08/2026 18:11

The females I know are just so much more capable and emotionally stable

Whilst I agree, almost all the threads moaning about in-laws involve MILs and SILs.

Something I don't really see in real life as most women I know tick along ok.

sittingonabeach · 20/08/2026 18:05

Have there never been any shit women in power?

Boudy · 20/08/2026 18:02

Agree with many world leaders etc. Also my dad was crap...my mum did not stay with him long thankfully.
My dp and my sons are fab.

VestibuleWeaver · 20/08/2026 17:59

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:01

Why don't you and @WildGarlicSoup start a thread about all the BITTER awful women out there then. Do not derail this one.

@Windiscrazytoday YANBU. Very few men are actually decent human beings. All the worst and nastiest shit in the world is because of them.

Show quote history

You’re not in charge of this thread.

Clydebuilt · 20/08/2026 17:59

Not in my experience. I chose well, he’s a wonderful man and a wonderful husband, I’m blessed to have him.

ginasevern · 20/08/2026 17:58

@Weeellokthen
"Very few men are decent human beings"😮
I am so sorry YOU have experienced shitty men in your life.
I choose only good men in mine"

It's completely fair to say it isn't your experience and I'm glad you have only good men in your life. But it is complacency of the highest order (not to mention extremely thoughtless) to imply that anyone who's husband, father, brother or son is nasty or difficult is entirely their own fault because they haven't "chosen" well.

Shatteredallthetimelately · 20/08/2026 17:56

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:01

Why don't you and @WildGarlicSoup start a thread about all the BITTER awful women out there then. Do not derail this one.

@Windiscrazytoday YANBU. Very few men are actually decent human beings. All the worst and nastiest shit in the world is because of them.

Show quote history

So only those that agree with an OPers title can comment on any particular thread?

No one's derailing the thread, its called having an opinion, maybe you only want to read one sided views.

Not quite how an open forum works.

Hatty65 · 20/08/2026 17:48

Nope. I'd agree with you over politicians/world leaders - generally a bunch of utter dickheads.

My sons and DH are pretty fab, however. DH is currently renovating our entire bathroom and fitting a new suite. He has spent all afternoon decorating and (despite the fact I know he hates painting) has done it because I'm not very well. I would normally paint. What's more he has done it without complaining.

He's lovely and does far more about the place than I do. He'd cleaned all the kitchen up when I got out of bed this morning.

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 20/08/2026 17:44

Weeellokthen · 20/08/2026 17:29

"Very few men are decent human beings"😮
I am so sorry YOU have experienced shitty men in your life.
I choose only good men in mine

Show quote history

You lucked out in the dad lottery then. And have been fortunate in not experiencing violent crime. How nice for you.

Most women only get to choose one or two of the men in their lives. The rest are environmental.

Bringemout · 20/08/2026 17:43

DH actually helps me regulate my emotions, he’s probably the only person who can calm me down quickly without being patronising.

I think men on average are worse than women on average (crime rates confirm that imo).

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 20/08/2026 17:42

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Why’s that then?

canuckup · 20/08/2026 17:37

Completely agree

Like having a third child

sittingonabeach · 20/08/2026 17:37

Do any of you have sons?

EmailsaysOOO · 20/08/2026 17:34

These days this is a common thing for a thread in Mumsnet. In real life , I think most women don't suffer with this feeling.

WildGarlicSoup · 20/08/2026 17:32

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:01

Why don't you and @WildGarlicSoup start a thread about all the BITTER awful women out there then. Do not derail this one.

@Windiscrazytoday YANBU. Very few men are actually decent human beings. All the worst and nastiest shit in the world is because of them.

Show quote history

Do not tell me what to do. However, in doing so you have proven my point. Bossy madam.

MummyOre · 20/08/2026 17:30

Lexibletheflexible · 20/08/2026 17:00

I think it depends the men you choose to have around you and why you chose them. My partner is anything but a hindrance to us and the rest of his family.

This 100%

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:30

Weeellokthen · 20/08/2026 17:29

"Very few men are decent human beings"😮
I am so sorry YOU have experienced shitty men in your life.
I choose only good men in mine

Show quote history

Bless.

Weeellokthen · 20/08/2026 17:29

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:01

Why don't you and @WildGarlicSoup start a thread about all the BITTER awful women out there then. Do not derail this one.

@Windiscrazytoday YANBU. Very few men are actually decent human beings. All the worst and nastiest shit in the world is because of them.

Show quote history

"Very few men are decent human beings"😮
I am so sorry YOU have experienced shitty men in your life.
I choose only good men in mine

MightyGoldBear · 20/08/2026 17:25

I felt this way growing up with my dad and brother. I was somehow this unpaid slave because I have a vagina.
Then I realised I was just surrounded by misogynistic men.

I met my husband and realised oh no men can be absolutely wonderful. He is a fully grown adult who takes care of himself the children the house and me! Obviously we are team but he enriches my life he makes it easier. That's how it should be.

Thewalrusandthecarpenter · 20/08/2026 17:22

Yes, totally agree. My father was a remote man who didn’t want a relationship with anyone, including his children; I unwittingly recreated my parents’ relationship. My ex left when I was pregnant nearly 30 years ago and I haven’t lived with a man since then. Having said that, I do have plenty of lovely male friends so they’re definitely not all bad.

risingup · 20/08/2026 17:17

YANBU I will never live with a man again because it honestly feels like having an additional part time job that you don't get paid for.

Swipe left for the next trending thread