Avoid In-laws because of jokes about my appearance

Right - dish it straight back out. They deserve every insult. Or tell them to shut the fuck up - that would be ok too.

Love it - you should have said it, the look on her face would gave been priceless 😂

How about saying, ‘why do you think it’s ok to make personal comments about my physical appearance?’

or say, sorry, couid you repeat that?’ People normally realise what they’re saying is inappropriate then. But they might not as they’ve been saying it for years. You could say’ ‘I may be short but at least I am kind’.

My SIL is 5ft it wouldn’t occur to me to make that into a joke. You in-laws and mad! I wouldn’t bother with them

My son as an early teen was short. he would get comments rather inevitable as his dad was 6ft 6. He used to take them to heart but then very quickly realised that if he joined in a and took the Mickey out of himself it’s less funny for everyone else. Tables have now turned and he takes the Mickey out of me as he’s now taller than me.

I am 5ft 3” and have never once had anyone comment on my height and thought 5ft-5ft 3” was shortish but perfectly normal
I would consider short being 4ft 11” and below

Although when it comes to clothes I think they are only made for really tall people.

Laughing at someone else's expense and dressing it up as a 'joke' is called bullying.
The only way to deal with bullies is to stand up to them. Call them out on their behaviour. If they don't like it, (and they probably won't) you walk away from all future family events

If it happens again I would respond with is it my turn now to make fun of your appearance? Or did you think this only went one way? Then look whoever it is up and down. If it is one of the children tell them it is rude to comment on someone's appearance and they wouldn't like it if someone did it to them to make them feel bad about themselves.

Point out to whoever it is that this is what bullying looks like and that they wouldn't like it if someone was doing this repeatedly to their child.

after so long of the same old bloody jokes just tell them they sound like a broken record and they need to change it. It’s dull and boring!

with respect to your husband but his comment did not address the issue. His comment should have been "stop bullying my wife" This will continue until it is named for what it is.

That's really rude and beyond tedious. I'm in my 60s and don't care as much what I say and would be tempted to ask them if they ever get bored of repeating such lame 'jokes'. 'You've said this to me at least 50 times over the years. Doesn't it get boring?'

As someone who is 5ft1.5, I can sympathise. I have banter about my height with one friend but we both know it’s just banter and I know they’d never take it further. Everyone is grown-up enough for it to have never been mentioned.

I’m also an identical twin, and we’ve had lots of stupid comments and questions, sometimes highly personal, over the years from people who frankly are old enough to know better. The trick is to turn it around to them, if they make a stupid comment or question just fire one back with a totally straight face.

“Yes I am short. Tell me, do you talk this way to other people my height? Plenty of people are this tall, it must get very tiresome for you”.

“You’re right, I’ll never be equal to you. What’s it like to be your height [if they’re above average height]? You must get sick of looking at the top of people heads and looking down all the time. Lots of MSK issues to come for you!”

Or just
”Wow, you’re (whatever height they are)? That’s so funny. Tell me, what’s that like?” Pause. Look at them, earnestly. They’ll probably stutter and then shut up.

I totally get this.
It needs addressing and I would start with the visiting nephew.
If he starts with the jokes, I would look him in the eye and very calmly say, ' you know I really don't like jokes about my height. You don't need to agree, you just need to know I don't like it.'
Repeat for each and every offender.

This teaches us the importance of nipping things in the bud from the start - with the first joke. You let it go on far too long.

Both you and your husband say firmly, calmly and politely that you don't want short comments unless absolutely necessary (eg height restrictions at the fair). Put it in a text to everyone. Maybe they genuinely don't understand it bothers you-but now they'll have no excuse.
Any time anyone says anything, you walk out.
Eventually they'll learn, and you staying away is pointless-it might well be your kids are short too, and surely you don't want them getting comments when you're not there.

You’re not getting it.

Joking about a woman being short isn't an insult. Short women are usually favoured. I can understand the jokes getting boring but refusing to go on a trip because of it seems overly sensitive.

They sound tedious and very boring. And of course rude. Which are all fine reasons to leave them to themselves. Why are they cutting off relationships as they get older? Shooting themselves in the foot.

What would happen if you burst into tears when someone mentioned your height?
Would they be mortified with guilt or consider you silly?

I would like to see them take a joke after a few ‘here comes fatty’ comments.

If the teenage visitor comments then they are told that it’s not acceptable and that if they continue they go home. Put down some boundaries straight away. Then stick to them.
If they were bullying your child you wouldn’t tolerate it. Don’t tolerate this.

BTW, I’m short and love it. Be proud of who you are and don’t let anyone make you feel ‘less than’. Don’t resort to retaliation, be better than them.

Good idea @diddl here's some more. (I was on a bit of a roll once I'd started)
Them. "You just can't take a joke Shorty."

"That's a joke?
Don't give up your day job cos you'll never make it as a standup!"

"That's a joke??? Tell me exactly why its funny?"
and follow up with..
"Oh I see. Schoolyard humour again. So sad." (channel your inner Penelope Keith and try to say it in a really patronising way)

"That's not a joke, that's a boring, repetitive insult iI have to endure everytime I visit." and follow up with. putting them on the spot.
"Please tell me why you find it necessary to keep doing this. What exactly do you get out of it."
Bluster bluster. "No seriously I'd really like to hear your reasons for doing it over and over again?
mumble.
"It just makes me feel sorry for you." or
(my favourite) "I thought you were more intelligent than that."

And if they carry on.
"I think you just meant to apologise, didn't you?"
if they don't, you can follow up with "How very very sad." in your most sarcastic voice and walk off.

The next round of jokes... "Really? Teenage humour... so unattractive in a 45 year old " (make sure to add at least 10 years to their real age.}

Easy to say, hard to do, I know.
But have something up your sleeve to snap back. It's amazing how much more confident you will feel, knowing that even if you decided not to take them on in the moment, you could have. Also have a plan for a quick exit if you want to just get up and leave, that also helps to feel that you could if you wanted to.

I think you've reached the no way back point where you have nothing to lose... and although your DH sometimes supports you, ultimately, they've got to see that you are prepared to bite back yourself. People like this will carry on doing it unless you push back because they are so lacking in inner resources that they find this kind of stupid chat entertaining.

Or if you wish you'd said something at the time, text the bwords. Ultimately, you sound as if you don't care what their reaction is anymore.. and they are being offensive to you.. so what then if being told how their mean behaviour affects people offends them. Boo Double Hoo to them. Good Luck OP. Cyranno De Bergerac their arses.

If short but I’m cringing at some of these responses, I’m sorry but if you used one of the comebacks on this thread if I was them I’d defo reply with “no need to be so short with me” 🤣

I’d get DH to come down hard on it so you don’t need to deal with it

Brilliant! And when they get offended: ‘it’s just a joke! Can’t you take a joke?’