Avoid In-laws because of jokes about my appearance

Forgive me but that doesn’t sound ‘harmless’.

My adult son is 5ft 5 and if any of my family joked about his height I would not have them in my house again.

I understand this OP. I am 6ft1 and get lots of comments about my height. It's tiring.

Tell them every time they make the joke that only stupid people make jokes about height. Say god what must it be like to be so stupid, can't imagine being so stupid, etc, etc, call them out but in a jokey way just please respond with a come back every time they say something. It is not funny, I can imagine how it makes you feel but how being a nice person means you don't want to respond in kind but you need to make them understand how stupid they are!!!

When these ppl are so rude(not their kids), I would not hold back and make it very clear once and for all , it is not acceptable, not funny and if they continue going forward you will see it as they are deliberately trying to be unpleasant to you. Your DH should back you up everytime ignoring it makes him complicit. Good luck hope it clears up.

I wouldn’t stop going to events if you otherwise enjoy them, I’d go on the offensive and put a stop to it. Think of the culprits and something about their physical appearance they are likely to feel sensitive about - weight is always a good one, big nose… whatever will work. Then next time for a first offence I would say ‘please don’t make fun of my height, I don’t like it’. Second offence would be ‘Ive asked you not to make fun of my height, if you don’t stop then how about I make fun of your (eg) big nose? Then if again, make a pre-prepared cruel joke (your fridge one was perfect so you can clearly think on your feet too). If they complain, ‘I know, I hate it too when people make rude remarks but you won’t stop so all I can do is reciprocate. If you can’t take it, don’t dish it out!’

Normaly I would take the high ground, but 10 years, family, I think I would say something. "10 years on and you're still making fun of me, bullying me because of my appearance. You saying you're only joking but I feel hurt and seperated from the pack each time. I have put up with this behavior from you all because I'm a nice person and we're family. I'm not going to be mean back to you, teasing you about your appearance. I'm simply going to pull back from any of you who continue to do this, and that saddens me.". It's a mouthful, so needs a good editing, but allows you to keep your dignity and is direct without stopping to that level.

I think if the teenager says something then just be honest and say that you don’t really like it when they make fun of your height but haven’t said anything because you didn’t want to make it a thing.

Teenager will likely not take the piss out of you for your height because you’ve addressed it properly and pleasantly. I dare say they’ll even mention it to some of the others and you’ll hear less of it

Do you or DH have a family group chat with these people? I would send a message along the lines of:

Hi all, I know over the years making jokes about my height has become a bit of a pastime with you all, but I find it very hurtful and would be grateful if you would stop. There is no need to respond to this message, I hope I have been clear. Thanks, Butterfly

Or just look them slowly up and down and say ‘Well, nobody’s perfect are they?’

I would open with, "Did you mean to be so rude, or are you just ignorant?" and follow up with, "I have already spoken to you, and now realise that this will be the last time we will converse, until you apologise to me."

That should soften their cough... and I am 5' 2".

Tell them strong poison comes in small bottles and after 10 years of it you’re sick of all the comments now, and if they continue to do it, you will be picking on them in return.

They are appallingly rude.
You are dead right to just want to be in such rude company. The end.

Should your nephew you make any remark, tell him this is MY house and I won't tolerate rude personal remarks about my appearance.
And mean it.

Stick to not seeing them.
It sounds like a win to me.

‘I don’t point out your fat belly FIL or MILs ugly face so I’d prefer you didn’t constantly belittle me due to my height’.

Be mean back. They’ll get arsey but they won’t do it again. You’re not even that short - loads of women are 5ft.

Something like this?

Some people don't mind being called fat or ugly either. Most of us don't like it though. Especially when it's repeated every single time even though the OP has made clear she doesn't like it. That's called bullying.

@butterfly245 Can you send out a group message about "Let us please be good role models to our children and let's not comment on people's physiques. Our children need to know that it's not OK to mock someone because they are short/fat/ugly etc."

I’m honestly torn op.

I’m 5ft. I also have a big knobbly nose. Both have been commented on sometimes on a daily basis since I was at secondary school.

I personally find all the jokes quite funny and just roll with it. Not attending an event because of it sounds alien to me.

the entire family repeatedly making ‘jokes’ about one persons physical appearance for a decade isn’t banter or ‘just a joke’ - it’s bullying - especially as OP has married into the family and as the outsider she’s the one being bullied.
how do they treat you otherwise OP?
if I was you I would maybe go - ask them to stop in response to every comment when it all starts up - and if they don’t then I probably wouldn’t attend another event after that

Are they all tall?!
No female in our family is over 5ft 4, most are between 4ft 11-5ft 2 the only person who comments on my height is my son as he’s taller than me now.
I find it odd that they keep remarking on it tbh, I would just say to them it’s getting really old now and it’s not funny…

"The best things come in small packages. Diamonds are smaller than bricks."

I’d expect my husband to tell his relatives ‘she’s not keen on coming because nearly every time she sees you someone upsets her by making her feel awful about her height. It’s been going on for years from lots of you.’ They need to have a shock. Telling them gently didn’t stop them.

It’s a joke….. hence ‘joking aside’.

no its not, that's descending to their level.