Avoid In-laws because of jokes about my appearance

@butterfly245 5ft isn't that short! The average woman is 5ft4.

I'm nearly 5ft 11. If people make tall jokes I just take the piss back.

"Yes, i can see if men are going bald. Did you know how bald you are going?".

You just need to retaliate with something equally rude.

Say "yes, it can see your three chins from down here " "yes I sometimes mistake your fat belly for a beach ball from this angle"

so you havent seen them for 10 years?

My aunt in law is 4ft 10 and my uncle is 6ft 2 nobody in the family has ever batted an eyelid. Your in laws sound awful.

My great aunt used to endlessly go on about how tall her grandsons were and my grandpa's response to her was "it's what's inside your head that matters, not how high up it is". He was 5 Foot 3 and a lovely man 🙂.

As regards the visiting teenager I think you'll find away from the pack, nothing is said and if it is you just shut it straight down. Your in laws sound insufferable. I can't imagine how they don't realise this is not ok. I'm not surprised you just want to avoid them.

I would either boycott them or call them out, but I have no tolerance for bullies.

How sad.
Always react asking them if they were born nasty or if they learnt to ridecule how a person looks from their parents?

Your DH should call a face to face meeting with his family and spell out that it is rude to ever comment on a person's looks. He states that he never wants to hear any unkind comment about anyone, even if a joke. He can give examples of not to call MIL - obese, SIL - fat arsed, nephew - goggle eyed, or you - short.

State clearly that DN will be returned home if he perpetuates the rude family tradition of teasing short people.

I read once that the taller one is, the shorter their life span, on average of course.

This!

No point reasoning with them as they don't sound very bright. They have got the same joke on repeat because they can't think of anything better to talk about.

You could shout, "BORING!" every time they comment on your height. Just repeat the word really dramatically and childishly.

Another option is to insult them back. Give them a taste of their own medicine.

Or you could proudly repeat, "Good things come in small packages" when they joke about your height.

Doing and saying nothing is just a signal for this boring joke to continue. You have to do something to stop it. I am the same height as you and very few people have joked about my height like this. Usually the people who repeat this kind of joke are a bit thick.

Are they like this with everyone or are they just bullying you? I am the same height and I hate shit like this. I’d make them uncomfortable. “If I wasn’t short, what would you bully me about instead?”

As they're overweight next time they make a comment about your height I'd reply with something like "well chubby cheeks just as well your other half is a chubby chaser and keep making similar comments about any flaws they have.

How about “Are we making fun of everyone’s physical appearance? I mean fair is fair, I accept my height with good grace, and other people could also get a haircut or lose weight as an example, if I were to comment on their style or suggested they were a fatso!”

There was a time when I put on weight and every time I went to see them my mother remarked on it. My sister also chipped in. I told them if the personal remarks continued I would no longer visit. My mother's response was that as my mother she had a right to say what she liked in her own house. I told her that's fine. I will not come to your house again. The following year I went to live in another city and they barely saw me after that.

You reap what you sow.

Excellent riposte.

I'll remember this one.

Im 5 foot 3 and told im tiny so this doesnt surprise me. Its boring though.

I’m 5ft on a good day, I get the jokes all the time too but I find it funny and laugh along.

I know I’m not there to witness it, but I assume they mean no harm? I usually find it playful and a sign of affection

I love this. My MIL is not even 5ft and she makes her own jokes about being short, I never thought to make some about her tho! It kinda…er…isn’t that funny?! These people really need to get some different jokes. I love what this poster has written, joke back at them for things they can’t change either!

My exH’s parents used to do this too. And whenever my ex MIL commented on someone being attractive she’d add that they were tall. His eventual affair partner was very tall 🤣🙄

I once had a boyfriend at school who kept making height jokes. I wasn't at all sensitive, 5' 3 is nothing unusual at all, but he just kept on and on and it was very dull. I snapped eventually and he admitted it was because he was self conscious about his own rapid growth spurt making the difference between us obvious, he was very much the tall lanky beanpole typical of teenage boys. That was the beginning of the end for the relationship tbh!

In your position @butterfly245 as it is so entrenched and your views have been ignored for so long, I'd treat them the same as my misbehaving children. You've hit your sister one too many times, one more and we go home from exciting party, they hit and off we go.
Tell them as you go in, after the hellos, 'Now I'd just like to mention something to everybody. For years there's been a running joke about my height, and it's always been something I don't find funny. I've had enough, it's not kind to keep making jokes at my expense and so I'm making it absolutely clear to everyone that I do not want jokes about my height. I'll be leaving if I hear something as I really am very serious about this and my polite requests have been ignored in the past. Ok? Now, DH, I'm just going to get the trifle in the fridge.. '

My sister is very tall, if people commented on her height she‘d make a comment about their appearance. She didn’t mind if she upset people who annoyed her.

I think I’m related to @Gardenisablooming 😂 I come from a long line on midgets ( am I allowed to say that?) Fuck off cunt was one of my 4’10” Aunties favourite sayings.

But ultimately my response would be “o just fuck off will you” “ I think you need some new fucking lines” “ grow the fuck up” “change the fucking record” and so on. I don’t normally swear when in any form of confrontation (ex conflict management) but I would absolutely just loose it with this, my ex used to think it was funny to take the piss out of my height, it’s ridiculous and they need to grow up.

Frankly the next time they crack a joke at your expense - call them out on it. Then when they say "I didn't mean it like that" crack a joke back about being overweight. When they object say "I didn't mean it like that". Rinse and repeat until they stop.

And if a niece or nephew is that rude a beady eyed stare and then something along the lines of - "I want to be kind and give you a hint - making jokes about people;s appearance is actually not something that is considered polite or appropriate in adult society despite what you may have observed in your own family and I'm doing you a favour by suggesting you learn to stop now before you are in big trouble at uni or work. "

Just fight fire with fire:

Haha, you’re so right, Fat Arse
Couldn't have said it better myself, baldy
You’re so funny, Big Nose
Brave words, Tombstone Teeth
At least it means I’m not in the firing line of your bad breath
You look like Cher - Shergar
Your bum looks like it’s always chewing your knickers.

I DARE YOU

My mother's go-to always has been "Yes I'm short... so was Napoleon."

It’s probably the nuclear option but a few replies of ‘ok fatty’, ‘yes, I’m still short lard arse’, ‘who ate all the pies?’ and ‘how strong is the suspension in your car?’. My guess is that these people can dish it out but can’t take similar ‘banter’ in return!