AIBU to prefer an all girls state secondary for my daughters?

My dd went / is now in the sixth form of an all girls state secondary and she’s really loved it and thrives there.

Its a really supportive atmosphere and the girls have the benefit of not worrying whether they’re being judged by boys all the time.

I was a bit nervous about sending her having been to a mixed state school myself but it’s been noticeable how the “bitchiness” that people sometimes attribute to girls schools is largely absent - it’s less “bitchy” (sorry to use that word but it’s what people say) than a mixed school as it seems that exists because of the presence of boys and the need some girls feel to impress them.

Edit - our school is in South London if it helps at all

I think you had a very bad experience

certainly wasn’t my experience and that of anyone I know.

I went to a all girls school I hated it! Girls are worse than boys ☹️ I left before the end of the first year girls are clique bitches that will gang up on a girl they don't like and they are the worst bullies you'll meet

Exactly. Plus, dismissing the experiences of those who didn't enjoy attending an all-girls school into the bargain.

I went to an all girls' school from 11 to 18. It was great. I married at 21 and we are still married now, well over 40 years later, so clearly it didn't hinder my ability to form a relationship with a man! I don't remember that being an issue at all. I wonder if it makes a difference that I had a brother and male cousins, and did meet boys through the church and its associated youth club. I can see that if a girl didn't have any young male relatives or family friends and only did single-sex extra-curricular activities that it might be trickier later on.

dd went to an all girls secondary. She enjoyed it but was ready to mix with boys at 6th form. I think there was bitchiness and bullying but hopefully she didn’t get involved.
As it was single sex it was popular with the Indian and Chinese girls and they dominated the top sets. Lots of tutoring going in there too apparently. My daughter was one of the few white girls in top sets maths.
But I do think lack of boys at school stopped her being distracted but them in class.

Take it with both hands.

Sounds like a plan! As long as like you said they interact with boys outside of school.

I also went to all girls schools from 7 -16. However had many boys as friends.

In fairness, those are both Catholic. If that poster is not Catholic she may never have considered either - the high performing Catholic / CofE schools near me have a mad points system so my children wouldn’t have been eligible.

I went to a mixed comprehensive and I would not say that it made me better able to mix with boys. The cool, popular girls did but I wasn’t cool or popular. The pool of girls to be friends with was halved and there was plenty of bitchiness (often in front of the cool, popular boys - a whole world of horror).

My children go to single sex schools (my son will have girls join when he goes into the Sixth form). It’s great so far. My daughter’s school, in particular, is relaxed in ways that my school wasn’t. As long as they are doing something “active” they can wear games kit that day - this means they can pretty much wear games kit every day because the teachers turn a blind eye. The girls are doing just fine so there’s no need to enforce rules for the sake of rules.

My DD is at an all girls state secondary school. It's fantastic.

Please remember, teenage boys nowadays are often watching violent porn...no more sneak peek at a dirty mag like the old days.... We're talking properly disgusting misogynistic porn, whilst their brains are still developing and they have ever experienced a real relationship. So yeah I'll keep my DD as safe as I can thank you.

I went to a mixed school but we were taught single sex. That was quite a nice mix. I did notice all my friends from all girls school were obsessed with boys. They would skip school to go meet boys and seemed far more interested in sex earlier.
But that's clearly not everyone. All the stats suggests it's far better for girls Academically. I'd just be making sure they had exposure to boys and encourage boys as friends so they don't become this strange forbidden fruit 🙈

”why wouldn’t we want to give them that?”
of course I see your points and agree with them to an extent.
however I also have strong reasons for rejecting single sex education and lots of people I know who were in single sex education have also rejected that for their children. It’s like all things in life, pros and cons to everything, but don’t think that there are no good reasons for co-ed because there are lots

It isn’t really stereotyping, though, is it? It’s true. Studies have shown (it’s taught in the A level sociology syllabus) that there are massive differences in teacher attention towards boys and girls and in verbal contributions from boys and girls, in mixed sex classrooms (the boys dominate both). There’s also evidence that boys dominate the recreational spaces, pushing girls to the edges or inside. And the government has a paper (linked upthread) about the problem of sexual predation and harassment in schools.

Sure it isn’t all boys, but it’s enough to be massively problematic.

Let’s face it, girls’ schools are actually a place where girls can exist, for six hours a day, outside of the patriarchal society. Why wouldn’t we want to give them that respite and that opportunity to operate with the freedom from it, if we possibly can?

Me too exactly this! Took me a long time to be able to have friendships with boys/men because I didn’t know how to relate to them and I never had any platonic male friends.

its the main reason why I would never send my girls to single sex school

My dd went to a girls’ grammar - suited her very well. She’s a STEM type, it was really good for her. No problem at all with friendships be it with girls or boys.

We have non selective single sex comps near us. Oversubscribed. Racially mixed but predominantly Asian. Which is partly our area anyway but also school of choice for many wanting all girls or boys for own reasons. My DD would have hated it but if the boys one was more diverse I think my DS would have thrived at all boys.
I wasn’t interested in single sex selective state grammars & private wasn’t a sensible option as wanted to be able to fund uni etc

I have two girls at an all girls state school and I am really pleased with how they are getting on. I echo all the positive points already made. I’m also believe that there is bitchiness and cliques at all types of schools, it’s definitely not just an all girls school phenomenon.

My husband was unsure when we first looked around secondary schools but he could see within minutes of stepping inside the girls school what a different environment it is. Girls schools only have to focus on educating girls, it’s hard to explain how nurturing and beneficial this is to a girl’s confidence and experience.

I grew up with brothers and went to a mixed school. Did not give me any special insight into the opposite sex at all, perhaps the opposite.

The irony of challenging the stereotype of bitchy girls, whilst simultaneously stereotyping boys