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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to expect the adult to address that playground behaviour?

220 replies

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:18

If your 6½yo kid was in a playground with 3 other similar aged kids who yours was trying to play with, and they were all talking about what they wanted to be when they were older... And one child kept interrupting your child with silly comments like "a poo head" or "some jam" and laughing at you and your child was standing there head down upset while the other child did that...
Would you expect the adult standing nearby to comment "oh come on now they're just being kids" when you went over, intervened and said "that's enough, they're being silly, we're leaving"

OP posts:
Bitzee · 17/08/2026 21:06

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 21:02

I already answered how we know each child.

Sorry missed that. So you’d never met silly kid before. Then absolutely it’s not bullying. It’s just an annoying random kid in a park that doesn’t want to play.

EatMoreChocolate44 · 17/08/2026 21:05

You are getting a lot of harsh replies her OP. The children were being unkind and if it was my child calling someone names I would step in and tell him to play kindly or I would be taking them home. I'm a primary school teacher and I teach 5 and 6 year olds. Kids are mean to eachother all the time and we are constantly stepping in to correct behaviour and talk through good choices, kind words, social stories etc. It's not a joke if someone is getting upset. They are only 6 and 7 so I wouldn't get too worked up about it, it is just silly immature behaviour, very typical for that age group. As time goes on your child will need to develop a certain amount of resilience but YANBU. Some kids are more sensitive and it's upsetting to see your child being hurt.

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 21:04

Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:59

They were being silly. Commonplace in 6 year olds. But getting upset over it is wimpish. Mind you I can see where the kid gets such over sensivity from.

It's not " bullying"

My dgc and his friends were fond of calling each other poohead smelly bun etc at 5 and 6.

But they didn't sit there getting upset, they just came out with more ridiculous names for each other

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Oh so now I should encourage her to call other kids names.

OP posts:
GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf · 17/08/2026 21:03

My kids would probably have said something back but they’re gobby. Generally I just tell them if someone’s excluding you it’s their loss. You need to just get comfortable playing alone and doing your own thing and when they’re alone and try and play with you, don’t be a back up option - the younger they learn that the better.

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 21:02

I already answered how we know each child.

OP posts:
Bitzee · 17/08/2026 21:01

Not every undesirable or unkind behaviour is bullying. Do you and DD know this child from elsewhere or had you literally just met them in park? If the latter it just cannot be called ‘bullying’ and it’s ridiculous to even suggest that’s what it was.

She’s going to encounter unkind kids, kids that don’t want to play and kids that are overly silly again and again. You need to teach her resilience to cope with it like saying don’t be so silly, walking away and finding something else fun to do. You won’t be doing her any favours by calling it bullying and by teaching her that an adult will intervene over trivial comments like ‘some jam’.

OneCoralGoose · 17/08/2026 21:01

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:56

I did remove her during the incident. But no.... I've just been told that my kid should toughen up, I'm overprotective and the kids were behaving just fine and I should have just let them crack on with their behaviour

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Six year olds were acting like 6 year olds. The dynamic between the 3 girls doesnt work. You should have left when they arrived. She needs to have a thicker skin as kids are mean but this just sounds like silliness. Shes not been hit or called proper names she is been teased. You teach her to talk back for herself and not let it upset her as she be dealing with idiots for the rest of her life

Seashor · 17/08/2026 21:00

That isn’t bullying. Look up the definition before you brand that word around.

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 17/08/2026 21:00

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:50

Fine.

I'll just let the others bully her next time.

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Or, just look up ‘bullying’ in the dictionary.

Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:59

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:56

I did remove her during the incident. But no.... I've just been told that my kid should toughen up, I'm overprotective and the kids were behaving just fine and I should have just let them crack on with their behaviour

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They were being silly. Commonplace in 6 year olds. But getting upset over it is wimpish. Mind you I can see where the kid gets such over sensivity from.

It's not " bullying"

My dgc and his friends were fond of calling each other poohead smelly bun etc at 5 and 6.

But they didn't sit there getting upset, they just came out with more ridiculous names for each other

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:56

Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:55

During would be an idea. But surely by now you should've taught her to walk away or tell the silly names child " don't be so silly"

It's something many learn at nursery

You do sound rather overprotective and taking 6 year old silliness as a personal insult.

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I did remove her during the incident. But no.... I've just been told that my kid should toughen up, I'm overprotective and the kids were behaving just fine and I should have just let them crack on with their behaviour

OP posts:
Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:55

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:53

Okay....and how do we do that? After the incident?

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During would be an idea. But surely by now you should've taught her to walk away or tell the silly names child " don't be so silly"

It's something many learn at nursery

You do sound rather overprotective and taking 6 year old silliness as a personal insult.

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:54

ChickenBananaBanana · 17/08/2026 20:53

As I previously posted a 6 yo calling another 6 yo a poo head is not bullying.

Fine.

Ok

The kids were playing really nicely with mine and mine was at fault for being a wimp. Maybe I should encourage her to interrupt other children, call them names and laugh at them when they're standing there hanging their head in silent upset..

OP posts:
Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:53

Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:52

Teach her to stand up for herself or walk away

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Okay....and how do we do that? After the incident?

OP posts:
ChickenBananaBanana · 17/08/2026 20:53

As I previously posted a 6 yo calling another 6 yo a poo head is not bullying.

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:53

LlynTegid · 17/08/2026 20:51

Parents should parent. At least one was not.

Who,.me?

What would you do if 3 kids were laughing at yours and calling them names? Just sit there and watch it happen?

OP posts:
Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:52

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:50

Fine.

I'll just let the others bully her next time.

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Teach her to stand up for herself or walk away

LlynTegid · 17/08/2026 20:51

Parents should parent. At least one was not.

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:50

drspouse · 17/08/2026 20:50

Bullying is repeated. This was a one off and your DC needs to learn some laughing-it-off skills.

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Ok

OP posts:
drspouse · 17/08/2026 20:50

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:19

Really?

You'd think it ok that your kid was being bullied by 3 other six year olds?

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Bullying is repeated. This was a one off and your DC needs to learn some laughing-it-off skills.

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:50

Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:49

I'd hope they weren't such a wimp they'd be worrying about such a thing.abd stood up for themselves

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Fine.

I'll just let the others bully her next time.

OP posts:
Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:49

Bitzee · 17/08/2026 20:47

Do you know these kids from school or somewhere or are they just randoms in the playground? But sounds like they didn’t want to play with your child and were immature/silly about it because they’re 6. If it were my kid not taking the hint, which is fair enough because she’s 6 and still learning social cues, I would have just redirected her into playing elsewhere, like properly elsewhere not next to these kids. I would not have expected parental intervention for saying ‘some jam’ or ‘poo head’ but actually it sounded like the kids parent was really on it and went over and above to encourage them all into a game of football… so I don’t really get your objection tbh.

Different parents.

Parent A was encouraging playing.

Parent B stood and watched them all be silly and tease my kid (particularly child C)

I walked over and took mine away from it all.

OP posts:
Timeforachange26 · 17/08/2026 20:49

Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:20

And if another child called your kid names all morning when they were trying to play?

You'd be cool with that happening to your child?

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I'd hope they weren't such a wimp they'd be worrying about such a thing.abd stood up for themselves

Original poster
Oscillating · 17/08/2026 20:48

hugasaurus · 17/08/2026 20:42

Some friendships only work in certain combinations. My DD1 has two friends, let’s call them Ella and Maisie. DD1 and Ella play great together, DD1 and Maisie play great together, DD1, Ella and Maisie end up with someone (DD1 claims it’s always her) being left out or feeling picked on because three is just a bad number.

I am confused though. In your original post you said they were all talking about what they wanted to be, and one child was being silly. Now all of them are being silly/rude and it was only your daughter talking about it?

Anyway I wouldn’t intervene but I would try to help DD1 if she came to me upset and come up with some strategies for the future. If I was the parent of another child I probably would say something if another child was upset, but with 6yos, the truth is almost always somewhere in the middle of two perspectives.

My child went over to climbing frame. The other three followed and They were talking with mine, saying what they wanted to do when older, like a builder or whatever, .and then mine said "when I grow up I want to be a-" and child C started the silly interruptions/name calling, and the other 2 started laughing at it all, and my child got upset hanging their head down. They didn't interrupt each other (A,B,C) they listened to each other, the silliness started when my child was trying to say what they wanted.

I might be too protective of my child and think this is bullying.

I have spoken to mine and said to not bother with A and B again when they're together as the only time mine was smiling and laughing was when A, B and C weren't playing near/with her.

OP posts:
Bitzee · 17/08/2026 20:47

Do you know these kids from school or somewhere or are they just randoms in the playground? But sounds like they didn’t want to play with your child and were immature/silly about it because they’re 6. If it were my kid not taking the hint, which is fair enough because she’s 6 and still learning social cues, I would have just redirected her into playing elsewhere, like properly elsewhere not next to these kids. I would not have expected parental intervention for saying ‘some jam’ or ‘poo head’ but actually it sounded like the kids parent was really on it and went over and above to encourage them all into a game of football… so I don’t really get your objection tbh.