To wonder if anyone has a normal, wholesome, monogamous relationship/marriage anymore

We used to get freaky, very normal these days though 😁

We fell in love when we were 17, got married at 21 and are still sickening our (adult) children (who are all married themselves) by snogging in the kitchen and holding hands on the sofa all evening. It's not been all roses but there has never been anyone else for either of us and we are well and truly in it for the long haul. He has supported me through so much - caring for my elderly mother took so much time and energy and every night he would be there when I got in with a cup of tea, a joke and a hug. When I was ill he supported me - gave me room to cry, encouraged me to spend time with friends. He really is my rock and we love each other and always will.

That really is revealing of old-school prejudice.

Loss is a difficult one because no one can fill the void left by someone we really “got” and shared life with. I think women often naturally gravitate to female friendships throughout life because those are the people we will often spend the later years with. Maybe there’s a reduced understanding of the significance of long-term knowledge of partners and friends.

I wonder if the swinger/sex party phenomenon is because people are so invested in the digital world of curated lives (Insta etc) and fantasy (gaming, films and the darker stuff) that they are losing touch with the limits of reality. A relationship with one person takes time, with more than one massively increases the time.

I wonder how people have ANY time for extra relationship complications because I never manage to get through my to-do list of home repairs, neighbourhood/community “voluntary” tasks, commitments to family and friends and a bit of reading/writing/tv for myself let alone the work invoked in meeting or sleeping with strangers!

I may not have polyamory experience but I do have an enviable tool and resources/matter collection that led by 14 yr old nephew to say apropos fashioning a replacement chess piece, “you can just make things out of nothing!” He has no idea how many “somethings” I have stashed everywhere! That’s my joy I guess and maybe complex human relations do the same for others.