To think this comment from manager was completely inappropriate

Oh god not you aswell?

Presumably OP isn't your 5 year old toddler and can choose her own food.

Roll eyes at you commenting this too... then move on.

Id make a joke if I knew the person well and they were slim. If they were anything other than slim Id say nothing ( but Id definitely think it)

It is not acceptable for him to comment.

you only ate twice in an 8 hour shift which is normal BUT your choice of food isnt great at all. A cake a donut and bread isn't going to sit well. A bloke once commented to me at work that every time he saw me i was eating. Like you I was early 20’s, great shape and I was tbf quite often eating when he saw me at break times. I always had a handful of veg eg carrot sticks, celery sticks, cherry tomatoes, baby corn etc to nibble on throughout the day. Id say it is much healthier but the reason I always had veggie nibbles was because i was also quitting smoking at the time.

Inappropriate comment.

to be fair the worst people I’ve noticed for doing this at work are other women, usually with weight problems themselves

OP no he shouldn’t have set it but you need to just get over it. You’ll come across a lot of wankers in workplaces over your career and you need to develop a bit of resilience in dealing with them.

Assume he's a bit of an idiot and move on.

I don't understand the point of going over and over it in your mind. Dismiss him and get on with your job. Idiots are everywhere.

Of course it was highly inappropriate and posters would be up in arms if an older female manager had said it, but misogyny is alive and well on these boards.

Are there any older supportive women you could complain to about his comments?

Well bullying is repetitive and intentional while this to the best of our knowledge was a one off joke.
As to jokes being funny to everyone except OP- if everyone else is laughing and you aren’t the first action would be to step back and take a 20:20 view - is this joke funny or am I being too sensitive? Invariably the answer is the latter.
This thread is a shining example of the growing lack of resilience in society.

I was waiting for someone to say something idiotic like this.

You won’t get far on MN with this sort of sensible and meadured Response @HatAndScarf33

I completely agree with this. Read it again op. And work Through the suggestions made.

Yes no jokes whatsoever. Someone always takes offence.

Thankfully it's not anymore. What's that got to do with the OP?

I used to work somewhere that was near a Gregg's, the amount of cream cakes, doughnuts and sausage rolls I consumed was ridiculous. No one was rude enough to comment and towards the end of my time there I was pregnant, so they wouldn't have dared!

It just sounds like a joke to me. I've known someone to make a similar comment when they happen to come in two or three times to find a colleague doing the same thing - e.g., if they were making tea or lunch "You haven't left the kitchen all day, have you?" or if they were in meetings "You're hiding from me, aren't you?". Forget about it.

I think comments on food are rude, and you never know what issues might be under the surface. Basically, it’s a can of worms that people at work shouldn’t open, particularly managers.

That does sound like a lot of cake in an eight-hour period…

Of course the comment would have been made to a male colleague. No question at all.

I used to sit at a desk of four in an open plan office and one of the delightful youths had the table manners of a pig. One day while he was demolishing a cream cake my colleague said "Peter, are you eating that or wearing it?" I suppose he'd have been hauled in front of HR for that now. Funny (and effective) at the time though.

Mostly because he’s her boss and there are very few workplaces where you can tell the boss to fuck off.

Google “upward management”, OP. In this situation I’d have raised me eyebrows with a slight smile on my face and said “bit rude”. Then asked a work-related question. Just state the boundary.

I have had comments from my manager about the portion size of what I take to work which is Greek yoghurt, fruit, oats and chia seeds. It is the only thing I eat all day, I weigh it all out and it isn't huge. There was no need to comment. I see what he eats and it's just so unhealthy!

I have commented on a colleague eating before but not because I cared what she was eating but because she had enough breaks to be able to eat. She subjected the rest of us to her revolting eating noises, talking with mouth full of food, food all over her desk, stinking office out with food smells. Nobody needs to eat that much as well as usual meals. Eating at desks is now banned thankfully.

There is no place for 'banter' in the workplace.

There is always a place for humour, conversation and fun.

Banter is just inappropriate personal comments made by socially inadequate people who haven't anything better to say. Banter isn't funny, it's usually a pointless observational remark of no value.

You say he’s a jokey guy, it was a joke.
You’ve had eating issues so he touched a nerve. He didn’t know this so made a silly comment that I would’ve laughed off.
You wouldn’t have wanted to be in one of my old offices - it was banter all day long and we all loved it. Many workplaces are banter-filled cos it’s the way to get through the 8-hour slog. Obv bullying of any type should not be tolerated, but it doesn’t sound like it was of that nature.
Some people on here are far too sensitive for their own good imho (I’m in my 50s though so a dinosaur!).

Yes it is rude and inappropriate.

I also bet he would not have said the same to a male colleague either.

I would have told him on the spot that I did appreciate on him commenting on what I eat...

If this is not a one of and becomes a pattern and he is singling you out from other employees with this type of 'jokes' make a note of each comment and when they happened and take it to HR.

I cannot for the life of me understand the comments on this thread that are criticising you...I am a manager and would never make such a comment to an employee. So sad that women are just encouraged to just accept that type of behaviour, which is still passed off as 'banter', from male managers and shut up in 2026.

Yep, and if challenged just say it was 'banter' , like his comment was.

This isnt at all similar!

And the correct response to the manager's comment would be to shove another slice in, while maintaining eye contact to establish dominance.

This is the perfect response.