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AIBU?

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Was I wrong to refuse DP a lift meaning he had a £90 taxi?

208 replies

Bethsvint · 16/08/2026 12:50

DP got the train to a nearby city with friends yesterday (a day drinking basically).

He was expecting to get the last train back at 10.30pm. Shortly after this, he called me to say he’d been told to leave the platform by the police. Reason being that he thought it would be a good idea to try to wind up his friends getting a train on the opposite platform by dropping his shorts/boxers and bending over in their direction. This was spotted by police who told him to leave the station or he’d be arrested.

I told him no. It was late, a 45 minute drive each way including the motorway. He got a taxi but is off with me as it cost £90 and he said he’d have picked me up in the same circumstances.

We help each other with lifts usually, have a good relationship and no issues etc.

Was I wrong to have refused?

OP posts:
FancyBiscuitsLevel · 16/08/2026 13:54

OP any dcs? My response would be different if you had to get dcs out of bed to go get him.

Im assuming this was a one off, he’s not in the habit of going drinking all day and then acting like a twat and needing rescuing, because obviously if this was a common occurrence you’d have the good sense to dump him. So assuming a one off, I’d go get him. I would, however mock him about it.

If you have no dcs and he’s more upset about the money and not about being such a dick, the perhaps this shouldn’t be the relationship for you.

Slightyamusedandsilly · 16/08/2026 13:52

NotMajorTom · 16/08/2026 12:52

I was going to say you were, but having read why he needed a lift I think it serves him right

Me too. I highly doubt you'd bare your bum across the tracks at a train station, no matter how rat arsed you were.

Eclipseydo · 16/08/2026 13:52

Yanbu.
He's an arse.
Maybe now he will give think about how he behaves after drink, rather than acting the idiot.
I wouldn't tolerate him being too off with you.
This was not an emergency, this was him being a fool.

Glittertwins · 16/08/2026 13:50

Damn, pressed the wrong thing. You’re not being unreasonable- what he did was entirely within his control and he was an immature idiot who got caught. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes!

godmum56 · 16/08/2026 13:50

baseline, play stupid games win stupid prizes

UrbanFan · 16/08/2026 13:49

I'd have picked him up. He was a twat but if generally everything is fine then just do it. Now don't be surprised if you find yourself needing a lift late in the evening he says no.

FookFookFook · 16/08/2026 13:48

My husband would do if for me, so yes id do it for him.

Ihatelittlefriendsusan · 16/08/2026 13:48

Had he missed the train inwould have gone to get him.

Being told to leave or be arrested for public indecency...absolutely hisnown stupid fault and I would have let him walk home never mind getting a taxi.

Ilovemyfam · 16/08/2026 13:48

I’m not sure if I might have said “sorry I have just had a glass of wine”. That would have avoided any argument over whether to go or not.

Is that a little bit of a cop out?

PinkyFlamingo · 16/08/2026 13:47

What an idiot. I know he was drunk but what a stupid thing to do.

thepariscrimefiles · 16/08/2026 13:43

It's pretty doubtful that you would be in the same circumstances as him as I can't imagine that you would expose yourself on the station platform and be removed by the police.

He sounds like an idiot and the loss of £90 should be a lesson to him.

ABitFab · 16/08/2026 13:43

There is no way I would have gone to collect them, none.

venmor · 16/08/2026 13:43

Likeiloveyou · 16/08/2026 13:16

He exposed himself at a train station?

I probably wouldn’t have allowed him back in the house.

Quite. A man in his 30s as well, not even a youngster being silly and making a mistake.- he is lucky the police didn’t arrest him tbh. It would seriously make me see him in an entirely different light. How vile.

Itsthewoluff · 16/08/2026 13:41

Agree I’d have picked up if train cancelled. This way was his own stupid fault.

nomorekitchenislandsplease · 16/08/2026 13:40

pastadish · 16/08/2026 12:57

I would have picked him up although my dh would have just got a taxi without asking me for a lift as he wouldn’t want me driving that late. It’s not like he did it on purpose, it was stupid and he should have know better but doesn’t seem malicious

Not malicious, but drinking so much in public that he risked being arrested is alarming, and I would want him to know he can't rely on being recused if he d it again.

GrumpyButOk · 16/08/2026 13:38

YANBU. I'd also point out to him that he might prefer to pay the taxi fare than spend 45 minutes trapped in the car with me listening to exactly what I think of his behaviour!

timtamsarebetterthanpenguins · 16/08/2026 13:38

Was he not mortified to ring you and tell you why he was kicked off the platform?

Vaxtable · 16/08/2026 13:36

As ad adult he is aware that every choice has consequences. He chose to act like a twat, the result of which is he missed the train and now sucks up the £90 and hopefully learns a lesson

why should you be inconvenienced because of his actions

parakeet · 16/08/2026 13:35

This is not the main point, but surely he could have got an Uber for half the price?
(I would not have gone to pick him up by the way.)

TheFormerMrsTruelove · 16/08/2026 13:34

I’d tell him he was a fucking embarrassment, but there’s no way I’d leave him to get a taxi home. Just as he wouldn’t leave me. The difference being that neither of us would act like that and if we’d missed the last train for any other reason, we’d have got straight in a taxi without expecting the other to solve the situation for them (which would explain why we’d both be willing to drive 90 minutes for the other).

Yetanotherone12 · 16/08/2026 13:32

£90?

I’d have booked him a Travelodge for £50, save having to deal with his drunk arse at all.

that or suggest he gets a cab to the next station on the route, and pick up the train there.

CornishTiger · 16/08/2026 13:30

I’d have been livid but my husband doesn’t drink or behave like this. I’d have made him get the taxi if it could he afforded. For some people they can’t and it would affect household budget.

Either way he’s a knob and I hope he’s suitability apologetic for his behaviour and pulling his weight today … and beyond.

Foodylicious · 16/08/2026 13:27

He would have been waiting around for you for 45 minutes after the police have told him to leave.
And 1.5hrs until he was home, instead of 45 minutes is a cab that I presume picked him up pretty much straight away?
Sounds like taxi back whilst costly, was the right thing to do.

Globules · 16/08/2026 13:26

What a twat! 🤣🤣🤣

No way would I have got out of bed for that.

Cancellation, yes.

Pissed behaviour? Sort yourself out mate. I'm staying in bed.

Ethelspagetti · 16/08/2026 13:26

45 minutes there and again back!!! No I wouldn’t have! Unless he was stranded, then that’s different.

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