To think Dsis is overeacting after SS hit niece?

I've worked with plenty. Behaviour like this SHOULD BE viewed as a red flag by teachers.

Your children aren’t at secondary

Clearly our experiences of schools are vastly different. I wouldn't,t like to be a child at all school that ignores those behaviours, would you?

Can guarantee if this happened in school the girls parents would considering calling the police also.

A year 7 girl. Hit by an year 10/11 boy.

I promise you, she would not get a detention

You do for calling someone a cry baby, asking them if they are going to cry, ignoring the teacher asking them to stop and ruining their work.

I cant believe you're brushing this off. Your step son did something ILLEGAL, you should be thanking your lucky stars that your sister hasn't gone to the police. He is above the age of criminal responsibility, unlike your neice, and he commited a criminal act. Will you be defending him when he hits his girlfriend and telling her she was asking for it too?

You don't get a detention because someone else has anger management problems. Nobody's fault but his.

The boy would likely be suspended and a behaviour plan put in place. The girl would likely be given a detention and a close eye would be kept on her, she may also be put on a behaviour plan if this is normal for her? The school wpuld consider why boyh behaving like this? Do the families need support? Are the children safe? It wouldn't be ignored.

Blimey you've gone from he might be ND to he's disabled. You're probably disabled after that reach.

Conflict between children isn't top trumps. The child that comes off worse shouldn't get a free pass. When children behave badly , their behaviour needs to be recognised by their parent and corrected.

I’m not excusing her behaviour (although it far from warranted a 15 year old boy hitting her) - and if the hitting hadn’t happened, we can only guess how her mum would have reacted.
also, I’ve said this before, but OP doesn’t strike me as a reliable narrator. We don’t know if the water spill was an accident or not.

i wouldn’t accept either behaviour from my girls…and I sure as shit wouldn’t for one second suggest the mother of the hit child was over reacting if my child (either of them) hit a much younger child in this situation.

Think for a moment how a school would have responded to this.

An annoying year 7 girl winding up a boy in either year 10 or 11.

And he hits her.

Would the school be focusing on the annoying year 7 girl? Or pretty much immediately expelling the boy.

The latter

Because physical violence trumps all of these things, especially from an older boy to a younger girl.

Tbh he doesn’t sound like he should be on joint holidays with other families, that’s on OP and he DH. He’s nowhere ready for it.

But again, you are excusing the girls behaviour. You think it is far too high of an expectation to expect a 10 year old not to name call, goad or pour water over belongings, or ignore instructions from an adult. It is a shame that we can't all just all accept that both children behaved in a way that isn't expected for their age group and therefore the parents need to support the children to behave better.

At what age do you not take into account a person’s childhood?

So for example, a rapist who has a dreadful childhood, and he, god forbid, raped your daughter, at what age would you stop having compassion for him? Any age?

I’m equally as shocked.

the name calling the girl has received is insane.

the fact that so many posters have done nothing but clamber to make excuses for the boy, and yet have such high expectations for the 10 year old girl - she should know better and so on.

poor, poor boy. She was asking for it.

I don’t know what would be worse, if the comments like that were made by parents to boys, or girls.

Your ss is on a dangerous path. He’s essentially been abandoned by both his parents and this will play out in the future.
The other child is not blameless but perhaps she will have learned her lesson not to provoke someone with a temper.

I've got to say I am pretty shocked by some of the attitudes on this thread, it has certainly been eye opening. Posters on this thread telling me they strictly parent their son whilst raising their daughter to never take accountability because at the end of the day, their daughter is statistically less likely to kill someone and need to put men in their place. I think this is the first time in my life I have been accused of misogyny. Anyone who knows me in real life would find that hilarious. It seems that a fair chunk of parents sadly do not have the emotional intelligence to approach conflict without viewing one person as the winner and one as the loser.

Some people are so busy pandering to their internalised misogyny that they’ll subjugate themselves to any character with a penis

Some people are so busy screaming about misogyny that they've lost all compassion for this abused and traumatised boy.

There are no excuses for his behaviour. End of. It’s good that he’s apologised. But in no universe is the little girl to blame. You and he both need to act your ages, not your shoe sizes. I’m personally sick to the back teeth of this normalised misogyny.

At 15 he isn’t an adult. He wouldn’t go to an adult prison. In court he is still considered a child

If anything his mental age is probably a lot less than his 15years old.

Ultimately this 10year old knows she can do and say anything to your SS as she is just copying her mothers attitude towards someone who is possibly ND and classified as Disabled.

All those who think the niece can do no wrong. Are you saying that it is ok to bully a disabled person because they are showing the signs of their disability
I actually think that is horrific

Will your sister ever teach her dd how to recognise danger. What if she carries on this sort of behaviour as she gets older and winds up an unstable person who has a weapon.

She might feel she can do and say whatever she likes because people aren’t supposed to retaliate physically but this is akin to stepping off a pavement onto a zebra crossing and not waiting for a driver to slow down or stop. The pedestrian might be in the right but what good is that if they are under the wheels of a car
Carrying on with this type of behaviour and one day someone who isn’t 15years old and the same height as her will retaliate and it will be a lot more than a slap

This isn’t about wearing a short dress and victim blaming. This is about a bully and aggressor getting a consequence when their victim was trying to get away and they continued to pursue them.

Whilst posters might not be able to tell the difference between a child and an adult, an aggressor (the one who was pursuing and being aggressive.) and the victim.
To me the SS was just defending himself using the only means of defence he had at his disposal.

From what has been written it sounds like this wasn’t a one off incident

However it sounds like it will be the last incident he will have to endure from this pair of bullies

He went to his room and she followed him? I think it's expecting a lot in that moment for him to continue walking away when she's followed him and continues to taunt him. I think many kids in that situation might have given her a shove, let alone a kid with his background.

He's 15, if he can't brush it off then he can go outside for a short walk on his own around the holiday park or wherever it was they were staying. He could step outside and just sit by a nice tree and listen to some music, watch a film, read a book, do some breathing, phone a mate, go for a run, go for a swim etc.

He's not chained to the accommodation and can step outside and do the millions of things that are available for teenagers at these sites.

One would assume this would be a privilege he has at 15, and the 10yo probably isn't allowed to leave the accommodation.

There's dozens of things he can do to get away beyond throwing his weight around.