Teen daughter has come out gay

people are mad! if a person doesn’t want their child to be gay, it doesn’t make them homophobic!!!
OP you had a cry… i would too! You expect your child to have a normal relationship with a man, have kids and so on. So, it will be in a way mourning that version of your daughter’s life.
My niece, came out as lesbian and although it was a shock at first, we have all accepted it and are fine with it.

Just wanted to add my agreement to the many brilliant posters who have said good things on this thread (thank you all), I started writing their names down, but so many have said the same things I think, and more eloquently, that my post would have been too long. I hope you have been comforted by them, and even guided by them. My daughter (one of 5 DC) came out as lesbian about the same age, and all has been fine, has had a couple of lovely partners, may or may not have kids, has had no issues at work. Don't worry about the tears, when your child tells you some news, we sometimes have tears, regardless of the news, regardless of the subject, sometimes it is tears just to know you were trusted and loved enough to be the one told. It's all good XXXX

Oh goodness, I had no idea that teens in 2026 still had to ‘come out’ to parents. In the 90s I never had to let my dad know that I was a straight woman who fancied boys. Why should gay people have to discuss their preferences with family members when straight people avoid this cringe experience? Gay DS didn’t come out - he just brought a boy home on the assumption that we got it. We did.

Jesus Christ.
2026 and we still get this shit.

You don't need to do anything other than you'd normally do regardless of sexuality - be there for her if and when she needs her mum!

It's good too that you've the kind of relationship where she told you, so kudos to you both. You'll all be ok.

British homophobic saying its not right for gay people to have children and that they will be mentally harmed

Because it's not necessarily an easy path in life.

🙄

With quite a few teens its just following the fashion.

Hey OP. Woman who is happily married to a woman here. Please know that as an adult, knowing what I know now - yes, homophobia does exist but so does male violence against women. Obviously your mileage may vary depending on where you live in the world, and how your daughter presents, and women can be abusive too, but I honestly think I’ve come out on top in life by having the privilege of being same-sex attracted. It’s ok that you’ve had a cry and that you might be worried, those things are normal. But let your daughter know you love and accept her, keep channels of communication open and I’m sure it will all be fine!

My daughter is gay, she has a wonderful girlfriend and if she's happy I'm happy is the long and short of it. For my family and all her friends it's not remotely an issue but I know not everybody is like that.

My daughter is well aware she may face prejudice and is careful when she unfortunately feels she needs to be, but day to day life is just living life.

She never 'came out' just simply brought her girlfriend over for lunch, no biggie.

I will admit, I don't really understand your tears but your feelings are yours to work out and I'm sure you will. I wear my rainbow pin happily and I've attended Pride celebrations for years before I even had my.girl.

Parents will worry about their kids every situation, it's what we do but who my daughter fancies is not a worry if the relationship is kind, happy and loving.

I think you did what you should do . I also think it’s normal to have a little cry because we know they will have it a bit harder than most and I think that’s why parents worry . You just keep on doing what you are doing . Oh and don’t be surprised if she changes her mind down the line my step son came out as gay same age and is now heterosexual at 20 🤷🏻‍♀️

This 💜

Exactly. I'm embarrassed for @WerewolfOfLoudon (as well as a couple of other posters!) Honestly, some of the comments coming out on this thread from a small handful of posters are mind boggling, and utter nonsense of course.

Sounds good she knows whomis she already and confident enough to be herself

All she needs is to feel accepted unconditionally from you

@nowhatx
When my youngest told me I'd guessed already but was still glad that she'd done so
I told her I was still her mum and would always support her and was always ready to do whatever I had to as I do for her siblings; I still wonder and can get a little fretful about the world out there after all this time but I take each day as it comes and that would be what I'd say to you. Pride with Love

I’d just carry on as normal… she is only 15; I’d just follow her lead but I wouldn’t make a big thing of it as it may or may not remain the same. I would definitely say how thankful I am for her sharing something so personal with me - lovely she feels she can tell you xxx

Ahhhh this is a nice reply ☺️

When my daughter came out. I bought a little rainbow badge for my handbag. I know she noticed. She’s not a massive talker anyway . But I know she noticed ☺️🌈

I have 3 straight children and one gay. She did as your daughter did, and came out to me, but actually she didn’t need to. She could have done what the others did, and just brought a girlfriend home to meet me. My job is to love and support her, not judge her for her sexuality.
You sound like a lovely mum, you must be, because you responded with a cuddle, though obviously it’s been a bit of a shock. When that wears off just embrace it, Get yourself a supporters badge and encourage her to bring her friends and girlfriends home. You might just be the mum another girl needs, if her own parents haven’t responded as you have. Sending you a big supportive hug, and a reminder that nothing has changed. Your daughter is still the same lovely girl she always was.

It isn’t remotely homophobic, and it’s totally ridiculous to suggest it is. It is 100% obvious to anyone and everyone that there is automatically an extra barrier to conceiving for gay couples than heterosexual ones, before you even get to fertility or choice.

I think @estrogone is enjoying giving out shit to try and make the OP feel small, but obviously can’t take any form of criticism back.

She refuses to believe that in 2026 hate crimes and prejudice towards gay people still exists. But doesn’t like being challenged on that view. How sad.

More young women are actively choosing not to have children, it's pretty homophobic to say there's less possibility of grandchildren just because a teenager is gay.

Plenty of straight women can't conceive naturally with their partners either.

It’s not homophobic. It’s okay to completely accept her for who she is but be scared and yes, fear, for what the future holds. It’s just another hurdle of discrimination she’s now going to face as a woman.

My sister is a lesbian and she faces fetishisation on a daily basis. People not believing her (because they can turn her straight), homophobia, disgusting comments. Society is certainly more progressive but homophobia is still everywhere. That’s not to say it’s not only lesbians, my best friend is a gay male and it was only last month he was getting homophobic slurs shouted at him for walking through town holding hands with his boyfriend. His boyfriend has also been assaulted for being gay before. We live in a very progressive city too.

Crying doesn’t mean OP is homophobic or unaccepting. It’s okay to acknowledge the fact that some people will now treat her daughter differently for who she is, and some people will hate her for being her and it’s okay to be sad about that. It doesn’t mean she isn’t proud. It doesn’t mean her daughter is any different or her life won’t be amazing, but there will certainly be hurdles there that OP wasn’t aware of before.