AIBU to complain after a bus driver shouted at me and my children?

He sounds like an absolute knob. I don’t think I’d bother complaining, they won’t do anything. Just try to forget about him.

I think he was really over the top rude but it's really rude to get on a bus and not even acknowledge the driver.

I haven’t needed any sort of bus tickets for my Gdcs (11, 10, 6) when taking them out and about on double deckers recently (outer London).

aww poor bus driver, the mean kids didn’t say hi to him when they got on….

The older I get, the more often I respond to this sort of thing with a very measured and softly spoken "are you speaking to me". It stops them in their tracks. It doesn't happen often but I reckon Dr's receptionists 1st, buses 2nd - can't think of other examples.

Bus driver sounds like he’s more than capable of looking after himself, he’s certainly no ‘poor’ bus driver. Aggressive ahole more like.

My guess is, he didn't realise your children were with you. You paid for yourself, and assumed he knew the children were with you. They simply followed on behind you, without acknowledging the driver. He then shouted because your children didn't acknowledge him, and he didn't issue them a ticket.

He shouldn't have been so aggressive or spoken to you or your children, in the way he did.

Your teens were not rude. The driver was though.

I wouldn't be so apologetic and wouldn't have been as understanding of his behaviour. I wouldn't have been outwardly rude, but would have told him something like "OK, I misunderstood. No need for this, just print me the tickets." I'd have also observed the name, which most have on a badge on their uniform so that I could make an accurate report to the bus company.

Yes, I do think you should complain. People like this arsehole get away with treating women, especially those with children in tow, like this far too often. If we don't make a concerted effort to get things changed then this will continue.

As some have already said, it is very noticeable that they almost never behave in any such a manner towards other men.

Good on you op, take no responsibility for you or your children.... Such is life these days. Poor bus driver.

@Buscomp I would email the bus company and complain. I’ve done that on the few occassions bus drivers have been arses. It doesn’t change the fact you got shouted at but if you tell them where and when it happened they’ll at least know who the driver is. It may not be the first complaint against him.

Same.

Well judging by the teens on our local buses he probably had a fuck full of moody teens that day, he obviously assumed they were alone, and was ready for a confrontation as the teens quite often cause issues on buses. Maybe the last teens on his bus were abusive and he was expecting the same. I think I would just put it down to a misunderstanding and a man doing a shit job in extreme heat who was at the end of his tether and unfortunately you got the brunt of it.
we don’t travel by bus because quite honestly it really is the shittest way to travel . I only get a bus if there is no other option as people on buses can be mental and unpredictable. All the weirdos get on buses. obviously not everyone but if there is a weirdo about you can bet they will be travelling by bus.

Good point. He obviously identified OP as someone who didn't look like she'd bite back and he was right

I'm sure several of us have dealt with the public in our jobs, it's not nice when you aren't treated in the way you feel you deserve (however you define that) but it's not an excuse for aggressive behaviour or unsolicited advice that has nothing to do with your job.

I also agree that he'd never have done this to a man.

Some people are just unpleasant, no rhyme or reason for it. It’s their default setting because no one pulls them up on it.

This

A few weeks ago,I was crossing a very quiet road on the zebra crossing

I'd looked both ways before stepping out just as a bus came hurling around the corner (it is a bit of a blind bend but he certainly didn't stop/look)

He had to put the brakes on sharpish when he saw me

He leant out of the window and shouted 'MOVE OUT OF THE WAY YOU STUPID BITCH!FUCKING SLAG!' before giving me the finger

He's known for it apparently-he seems to hate women and a few days ago,tried to pull out when dp had the right of way on another road,he came within an inch of him hitting us (we got the ranting and another middle finger)

He drives so dangerously but the company don't seem to care

Some bus drivers are wankers and some are so lovely

I think it may well be true that he picked on your kids because they were girls. He probably wouldn't have picked on a couple of strapping lads or children out with their dad.

I've no time for men acting aggressively and shouting at women. It was clearly a misunderstanding, so no need for that sort of reaction.

That said, what was with all the apologising? From your Op, it sounds like you said sorry about 4 or 5 times? Once would be more than enough. Just a "righto, sorry about that", then move on.

Yes it would be interesting to know if he'd have treated a man and his sons so aggressively if only the man had greeted him. I bet not.

Weird that u wouldn't stay with ur children to make sure all ok with them getting free ride. Poor bus driver, how was he supposed to know ur kids age etc... I think u should act more responsibly tbh, avoid annoyance especially for driver, but also for your children.

Whoa, just picked up it was OP's two daughters the driver shouted at. That changes things for me - until the last page I had in mind he was a bloke playing the big man with two lads. Shouting at two teenage girls puts a different slant on things for me, especially the ages they are.

Complain, OP.

Yeah, maybe he's having an off day, maybe he's dehydrated, maybe he needs a pee. That is for the bus company to look at his hours / his route / facilities etc - bigger picture.

Or maybe he's a bloke who likes to use his small power over women / girls and there's a pattern / history of complaints about him.

If it's London then there's CCTV on buses. Also, 60 years of using buses in London I think I've said hello to a bus driver a handful of times - most of the time they aren't making eye contact, I usually give a nod if they are, and I'll say thank you when I get off because, well, I'm thankful for the journey if they are considerate etc... I have complained about 1 driver in all that time who was on a power trip and deliberately shut the door on two gay men waiting to board and tried to skip a stop when there were women waiting to board.

The only people I've seen acknowledging or saying hi to drivers tended to be elderly people who probably get the same bus every day and see the same driver. I'd have thought most drivers just want to get you on and off safely and quickly so they can get on with the route.

YANBU

I would definitely complain. I once got shouted at by a driver who said I was taking too long to pay for my ticket and told me to hurry up. I had a small child and a baby in a pushchair with me. I complained and an inspector came to my house and spoke to me about it a few days later. Apparently another passenger had complained about his behaviour to me as well.
Bus driving is not a great job but there's no need for rudeness and aggression. I have always found that the male ones moan at women but will never say a word to aggressive looking scary guys.
Don't put up with it, complain.