AIBU to wonder about names in the past.

My father in law is called harry. Not one of his friends knew that till his wedding day and they all called him Danny an adaption of his surname

I just get called trouble and im not old enough

Ah yes, maybe Queenie was for Victoria. I remember reading years ago which name it was used for, and half thought it was Mary, but Victoria seems likely.

It's probably easier if it's your own children; but if it's your grandchildren, and you have two or more with the same name, that could get very confusing.

Even more so if it's cousins, as they may all be of the sane generation. Although unlikely, it's also not beyond the realms of possibility that you could have two cousins with the same name whi were born on the exact same day!

I'll still never see the sense of it. It's like writing a shopping list with 'carrots' written a dozen times, but you know that one of them is the type of carrots that are made fron flour and come in sliced loaves; and another is the type of carrots that are laid by hens; and another is the type of carrots that previously went oink before they were killed and cured... except it's not just a bunch of groceries - it's actual people, for their whole lives.

I still think it could be confusing outwith the date of birth, though - especially if it involves people who did share the same address at one point.

I don't think I've ever seen my date of birth mentioned in any will that I've been named in - but then, I suppose you would ensure that you did include it if you know you're part of a family that gives the same names to everybody.

I'm a bit puzzled with the people who like to have their children/grandchildren named after them - presumably seeing them as an extension of them rather than as an individual in their own right - that they would actually want that for themselves, regardless of how the child may view it as they grow up.

Personally, I'm extremely far from the most amazing or interesting person ever; but I wouldn't want to share my own name with somebody else in the family either. Fair enough if it's somebody who marries in and who happens to have the same name; but other than that, whilst I'm still alive, I would very much prefer my name to only refer to me within my own family.

This is true. My dad died in 2023, his will was written in 1994 when I was a student living at home, between 1994 and 2023 I moved (several times), my parents moved house, and I got married and changed my surname.

But I am still "my elder daughter, Lalique".

Yes, that was very much the case in my maternal grandfather's family.

There were several family members named "Alexander" at one point so diminutives and nicknames were used. That's still a common one in Scotland, so you'll get Alex, Sandy, Eck, Zander...

In other countries they'll use patronymics instead.

They can, but the last known address is a way of tracing people. That coupled with the date of birth is normally enough to identify someone.

Every single Scottish will that I've seen has included the address that was current at the time that the will was written together with the relationship to the will signatory.

Well, yes, because that's what brings us round to the 'that's why people used nicknames/diminutives/names completely different to the birth cert' explanation in the first place! They were less concerned with duplication on the birth cert and differentiated by other means in daily life.

Has anyone pointed out that Edwardian families can be very big so if you have several siblings who all have several children and they all name the first son after Grandad their risks being confusion

@ParsleySageToiletDuckAndBinBags Was it 'Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells'?

I guess it's part of the 'fun' for people who deliberately choose to make it confusing as to which person is which, instead of treating them as individuals who are easy to differentiate.

But they can't then go blaming other people for the obvious consequences of their foolish choices. What did they actually expect you to do to prevent this from happening?

Maybe they're these bizarre people who are only happy when they have something to complain about - and will go as far as deliberately engineering the drama for new material! Terry Wogan used to talk about the people who would sit at home in front of their TVs or next to their radios, just waiting to be offended!

But addresses can change a lot... and, if you have such a tight-knit family, what's to say that people may not have lived together in the same address, or even taken a turn at residing in a 'family house'?!

True, it wouldn't be an easy task! It's never actually going to happen; just ideology on my part!

That poster wasn't being serious.

As an aside, I once worked in a bank many many years ago before t'internet and we had a family group of customers. An elderly woman, her middle-aged son & his wife and their three adult children. All with the same surname. Fine. None of them had the same first names, but they all had exactly the same initials. Not only that, but they were all doctors. There were six bank accounts.

Dr G.P. Smith could have been any one of six people, male or female. Honestly, the number of times they opened a letter addressed to one of the others and used the wrong cheque book, cheque card, bank statement and cashpoint card was beyond belief. They never checked the bank account number. They always blamed us.

How they all managed to become so highly qualified is beyond me - they didn't have an ounce of common sense between them!

Yes, but what would you have to do - provide birth certificates and a complete family tree for your entire extended family for several generations before the registrar allowed you to name your baby?

I don’t know how it’s actually spelled in her case, we were talking about it. She’s lived in the USA since the 1960s

Haha, no 😂

The registrar is the official gatekeeper, though - and also impartial in a way that your own family (every single one of them already called John or Margaret) aren't. If they don't get to veto it, then nobody will - and so it continues indefinitely.

Among my same-aged friends there's a... Sess (her name's Linda)...

I'm really not sure that I'd want to be known as Sess - her surname isn't Pitt, is it?!

But if everybody is called one of three or four different names, it's hardly difficult for your enemies to guess!!

Not the main point, but I don't understand why people in English-speaking countries would call their DDs Wilhelmina - spelled that way - when they would never have dreamt of calling their DSs Wilhelm.

Something like Wilma or Willimina - even Williamina - make more sense in the absence of any Germanic heritage.