AIBU to be upset by my partner talking about craving younger women?

You sound very rational and level headed. He sounds desperate and rude tbh. Even if he thinks that he knows he shouldn't say it. You sound like you have a good level of self esteem and self respect. Set a boundary with him. You mention this kind of thing again and we are done. He can go off and chase a 30 year old making a fool of himself no doubt. You can find someone who is secure in themselves and knows how to treat a woman.

Oh love, put yourself first and firmly so. Sounds like today needs to be about self care which for me means turning off your phone, eating ice cream and reading a good book in the shade.

Sounds like you are wavering a bit.

Do you think you will take him back for one last chance?

It sounds like you might.

It is very disappointjng when someone shows their true colours and it turns out they are not the person you thought they were.
You sound strong and independent and see that he is a choice.. not a necessity.
Just not good enough for you.
It is healthy to take time to reflect and look after yourself.
Stay cool!

Well done for taking some time to reflect on your needs and wants and allowing him the space to do the same. He clearly needs a wake up call. Please keep us updated when you are less overwhelmed from the heat. The guy is an idiot btw

Stay strong, OP - what helps in the heat? A book in the shade with your feet in cool water?

I’m sorry to say, but he absolutely is referring to himself here. He literally looked at you, and made that comment, out of the blue. If he thinks he can pull a younger woman, let him try… he’ll be in for a rude awakening.

And then the comment he made to another woman asking if she has a younger sister for him, whilst sitting right next to you?!! 🤮

His mask has slipped far too often, the reality is, he thinks he can do better and he has zero respect for you. He’s a creep and you deserve better. I agree with your ‘no contact’ approach and well done for turning him away when he popped in unannounced. I would go one step further and block him.

Yes, I imagine dating in your 60s is not easy, but given you spent years in an unhappy marriage, you’ll know that being single and happy is better than being in a relationship and miserable… especially one where he continues to chip away at your confidence with remarks like those.

It’s sound like you have a good support network around you, including your daughter. Lean into that and spend time with people that make you happy and build you up, not knock you down.

This. He's a misogynist and a walking cliche - don't tolerate it, bin him off and move on with your life. You are NOT overreacting - he's a creep and that's basis to end any relationship.
There are better men out there. I used to believe all men were like this, but that's just what they want us to believe so that we accept their sleazy behaviour and don't think we can do better x

Yeah he’s blown it hasn’t he? And he’s said similar things before. Let him go and try his hand at attracting 30 year olds on dating apps then!

I’m single long term and 58 and also look good for my age but the only men who try to match with me on dating apps these days are 70+ - they really do think a woman 20+ years younger is their right, despite them not having taken care of themselves and look far older than their age and can’t seem to string a sentence together. Meanwhile, most women I know my age look bloody amazing, are fit, healthy, financially independent and fun.

I should hope so!

He basically told you, to your face, that he is with you because he cant get a younger female. How does this make you feel? I would be hurt and upset.

You can still keep him for sex, I guess, but he is gross and he has no respect for you as a person. What a wanker.

I hate men's tendency to salivate over young females. It seems the age is the most attractive thing to these saddos - they would leave a stunning 40 year old wife who is supportive, caring and intelligent for an average looking 25 year old barely able to read. Just because, you know, she is 25!! One of the guys I knew (he was 39) was referring to his partner as a "23 year old" - not a name, not "girlfriend". Just in case we forget he pulled a young one.

Crave a younger woman. Ewwww.

Get rid of him. He is a disrespectful pig. I’d try to get him back by saying something spiteful about him tbh - he deserves it!

Who does he think he is? He can crave all he likes, why would a younger woman want to date him anyway? I have no idea why so many men are this delusional.

It sounds like he's insecure and wants you to think that you're the one who is lucky, instead of him, in case you realise your worth. I've been married almost 30 years. My Dh looked at me, out of the blue today, and told me he thought I was beautiful. My hair was in a bun, I had pyjamas on that are several size too big, no make up and I was feeling grumpy because of the heat. I'm not a spring chicken. This is how you know someone values and loves you. I'm sorry, OP. He sounds mean and you deserve better.

As others have said, I wonder if he's 'negging' you because he's insecure. Whatever the reason, it's unacceptable and also shows how stupid he is, especially if he's aware that you can do without him. If it had been the first time he'd said something stupid and he seemed sincerely sorry and eager to make up for it, maybe I'd try to forget, but it's not the first time. His previous comment might have been even worse, imo! I wouldn't want to be with someone who I knew might come out with things like that at any moment, even if it was a rare occurrence.

I dont disagree but how many women go for older men?

Maybe they in Thailand and run a 'ladyboy' bar

Yeah. Sounds like BS to me too.

You know 20 - 30 poor old men with much younger girlfriends?

What on earth makes him think a younger woman would be interested in him??

You know 20-30 men aged 60± with girlfriends in their 20s? I find that incredibly difficult to believe. I dont know any and live in a big city and have a wide range of work and social contacts. I can't even imagine why a young woman would want to date someone older than their dad and if they did im sure they'd soon get bored of them.

🤢