To not make my son share?

It’s so worrying (and frankly upsetting) that people think that this constitutes as parenting. You’re doing your young child a huge disservice by not teaching them social norms (how to share properly!) and making the next generation so selfish, egotistical and entitled.

Unless there were enough toys made available for all children to have the same number of toys as your child, you're not only being unreasonable but also selfish and quite entitled.

Sharing is the act of dividing, distributing, or jointly using resources, space, or experiences with others. It can mean handing over a portion of what you have, mutually experiencing an event, or communicating thoughts and feelings.

That is the definition of sharing. Do you think that’s what you were doing?

I think if he took a shine to one toy maybe you could get away with hogging a little bucket or watering can the whole session if there were plenty of others.

However, you had far too many toys ring fenced by you for just him to play with. If you don’t like to share them I’d buy some and bring your own next time. Use permanent marker to label them and explain they’re from home.

Really would be better for your child to learn to share modelled by you. So say something to the effect of ‘lots of children would like to play with X toy, you can have it for 5 more minutes then we’re going to share/ swap’.

No no no.

I am a gentle parent. All it means is, in that scenario, I would empathise with my son's inevitable frustration when I tell him that he can't sit there hogging 9 toys with his 2 tiny hands and he needs to choose the one he'd like to play with and put the rest back in the toybox.

I wouldn't shame him for being upset. I'd tell him I know it's upsetting, but he can't sit on all the toys like a dragon on gold. He's the most important person in the world to me, but he isn't the most important person in the world and all the other children should be able to have a lovely time in the pool.

He's too little to understand sharing. I'm not.

My gentle tone is every bit as direct as above. I don't pander. "I get it, and you can be as mad you like about it, and we can decide what to do about how you're feeling. We can leave if you like or we can stay and play with one toy, but what's not happening is you keeping all the toys. Choose your weapon."

Don't make this about gentle parenting. The OP is a dick.

Letting people use things when you have finished is not sharing. He is in for a big shock when he goes to school and mummy isn't there.

Yay - another entitled man added to the world!

The clue is shared toys , your son picked quite alot of the shared toys and had them for an hour , you are beinf very unreasonable

I agree they need to be taught from early, as this thread demonstrates.

Sometimes reinforcement is needed though as good manners and consideration is sometimes not in the forefront of young minds.

Hearing things like this confirms my concern that many parents have become too child-led / permissive / 'gentle', and that it's going to create a generation of rather entitled kids!

OP: My little boy was upset because he'd been playing with those toys for nearly an hour...

We absolutely teach our children to share, but our rule is that if they're still actively playing with something, they can finish their turn first. Once they're done, sharing is expected.

...
That's not sharing is it. If I'm sitting at a long table and somebody asks me can I share this table with you I don't say okay when I've left it and call that sharing.

Thought this was a reverse at first but I think you are earnest, worryingly. You are teaching your child that his wants are more important than other kids, and therefore you are teaching him that he is more important than other people, not great.

this all day long

If this is true the Mother will need to be prepared that her little darling will be unpopular at school. Greedy selfish children often are.
I notice the OP has not come back either, that's what makes me think thos is a wind up.

I suspect if this had been another child hogging multiple toys the OP would be wailing about how someone else took everything and her precious angel was left nothing and how unfair it was

Good luck when your kid goes to school etc OP

Because he had multiples of stuff?!

How selfish to hog all the shared toys for so long.

Why did my child have to be targeted after the first time he said no? Why no one else’s?

Guessing other kids didn’t take so much stuff in the first place.

What the fuck - it's put out as SHARED toys for everyone, yet you think your son should be entitled to NOT SHARE when he had two plus some others as he enjoys 'independent play?' ? And you think THEY are being unreasonable?! He hogged it for 1 hour?! Jesus fucking christ - the entitlement of some people - breathtaking.😳Bring your own god-damn toys next time, and teach your son to share next time if he wants to hog the SHARED TOYS which are NOT yours.

2 buckets, a watering can, a few small toys and a float

Yeah, you have to share that. 1 bucket and 1 toy, then no. YABU.

“he'd been playing with those toys for nearly an hour”

So definitely time to share. Yabu.

Which is why they need to be helped as young kids to assess for themselves , so they learn. Not be told all their lives how much they can have.

Because your single child had multiple toys for over an hour? Just a thought 🙄

“I don’t know” = “I don’t care”.

I don’t think you understand the concept of sharing yourself.

Ahhh it seems either of you know how to share 🫣

And your response is a bit worrying too- a) he wasn’t being targeted, most likely all the other kids were sharing by this point, and b) what do you expect if he was hoarding all the toys!!!