To not make my son share?

Dear God can you hear yourself?

'Targetted?' Because someone was asking to share the, what was it, 6 or so toys he was hoarding?

You don't know that they hadn't asked anyone else to share toys, and you'd encouraged him to take loads and not share them. That's a terrible life lesson.

Is he your pfb?

I can understand not making your child relinquish the one toy they are currently playing with just because someone else wanted it, but you were just encouraging him to have dibs on way more than he could use, while others went without, which is clearly unreasonable.

If he wants so many toys at once, bring your own, they only cost a few quid. But its a much better lesson to teach him he can't have everything he wants, all the time.

He's going to turn into an insufferable entitled prat if you carry on.

2 buckets
A float
A few small toys
and a watering can.....that's selfish and greedy at a shared session.

“he chose 2 buckets, a watering can, a few small toys and a float”

Blimey OP, are you sure he had enough?????

Sadly, many parents are. You only realise how bad they are when you have to deal with them!

I find it almost unbelievable that you would think it was ok for your son to tall all those shared toys - not quite one or two - take them to the far end of the pool, play with them for an hour and then still not share.

You should have intervened and set a reasonable expectation the first time: “ok well Henry which two toys are you playing with? Let the other child have these other ones as they’re for everyone” or something similar.

Yes, the adults shouldn’t have just taken them from your son, that’s bad form: but you should have been active in the situation not just passively watching.

Anything more than two toys, one per hand, and he was hoarding them.

If you are so strong on your kids having 2 buckets, a can and all the other stuff, just buy your own. You can't claim more than he can carry when there's not enough for the others.

They have the same rights as you

Look your son doesn’t like sharing or even playing with other children, just buy him an array of pool toys and go during a non session time.

At least you can then tell parents of kids trying to snaffle them they aren’t group equipment.

I think that nobody could possibly be this clueless. Are you just rage baiting, OP?

No wonder so many kids grow up selfish and entitled. So many parents are clueless about social norms .

Actually to be fair @HaveYouFedTheFish - apologies, I think your comment is fair - I did read the whole thing, but I thought that starting with the idea that there is any principle under which is this acceptable behaviour was a weird stance and also didn't apply at all in this situation. The stuff you said later is reasonable, but as I say, I think there is a basic principle at work here which is don't hog stuff and be selfish. Which should always be the starting point.

Have you read the whole post or stopped after the first paragraph?

Hogging that number of toys for a whole hour is staggeringly selfish of you OP. The very opposite of teaching your child to share

And as a PP said, you’re probably one of those parents that lets your child pieces of play equipment while other child are waiting, for an excessively long time.

This is bloody awful.
He took a whole bunch of toys, you helped him, allowed him to hog them for upwards of an hour and you don’t seem to be worried about creating a selfish monster. Well done you. Gold medal parenting.

Why ask if you are being unreasonable if you are unwilling to consider that you might be?

Is the Montessori principle also to hog seven toys for upwards of an hour - when obviously they are NOT all being played with?

I think the other adults were really rude but I think an hour turn is a long turn time when there’s other children waiting to play with the toys.

I totally understand wanting to let your child have their turn but I would have personally said something like “we’ve being playing with these toys for quite a while now, we’ve had a nice long turn, shall we let the boy have this bucket/ toy and play a new game” sharing & turn taking are important skills and I don’t really think it’s sharing if it’s a case of “you can only have this when I’m done” if I allowed that with my children at home then my younger ds would never get a turn with the toys.

Probably because other children didn't have two buckets, a watering can a float and a few small toys...

Sharing when you no longer want something isn’t sharing OP, it’s discarding. Most people would find holding on to multiple shared toys for this long completely unreasonable, if you’re genuinely interested as you say, see what most posts here say

YABU ,are you the parent at a playground who allows their child to hog the swing for as long they want to stay on it ? You really should have given one of the buckets to the other child. Very rude and setting a very poor example to your child.

If it was the only watering can you should’ve let the other kid have it. Your son had had it for ages.

Surely this isn't the point?

I think after your child had been playing with those toys for the amount that you stated it is not unreasonable to share with someone else then.

Why are you seeing it as targeting your child?

It's an odd way to see it

I'm guessing that other people in the pool probably asked other children if their child could play with whatever toy as well if there wasn't one. I doubt it was you being targeted in a situation like you're talking about

Why did you take at least seven toys at a time?

Maybe everyone else took two because they know the rules of social etiquette and that's why you were 'targeted' (stupid word in this context by the way) because you had more than enough for him to play with. Which you did.

You sound like you were a bit thoughtless to let him take so many things. You need to be more proactive. When he goes to race lirsbof things say choose two tots please. You can swap them later. When the other child wanted a bucket you shoukd have taken it from your child and offered it.

Why did he need 2 buckets AND a watering can? How many other buckets were there? TBH it does sound as if he was hogging more than his fair share, and you were going along with it.

If he ever goes to nursery/pre school - I’m assuming he doesn’t yet - he may have to find out the hard way about sharing and taking turns.