To not make my son share?

I don't think you understand what sharing means, OP.

Hint: It doesn't means everyone has to wait until I'm finished with it.

I think in a shared play environment each child should take one toy, play with it and then swap over. No idea why you thought it was ok to take a large bundle of toys then hog them for an hour and refuse anyone else a turn. Not only that you didn't even offer them when other people clearly wanted to play too.
Very rude of you tbh.

Oh, I don’t know!! I was at a scouting family day at the weekend and heard a mother say to her child (probably beaver age, so old enough to know better!) to not bother queuing behind all the other kids for his food and to ‘just push in at the front, you won’t get spotted’.

I wouldn’t let my toddler act like that, let alone encourage it.

It’s astounding the low values people pass on to their kids!
Teaching your child doesn’t have to consider into else or obey the rules means they are brought up entitled and pass that on, as we’ve read about here!

Awfully self centred mother, raising a hideously entitled little child!

Anyone with any decency would be so embarrassed by this incident, they would have gone home mortified, not posted the story!😂🫣

The fact this was posted at all says it all!

It is necessary to teach your child properly as a parent, selfishness should mean removal from the pool.
Please don’t return to this session. The other children and their parents don’t need the stress of your little child acting like a nightmare….and you encouraging such poor behaviour. You really let your self down acting so selfishly.

(as an aside, ‘no thank you’ is an utterly inappropriate response to a child who is asking to share, and he’s learnt that abnormal response FROM THE MOTHER!!!!!)

He’s not going to be able to do that when he starts school. Sharing is encouraged. You’re doing him no favours.

Honestly you sound incredibly entitled in your own description of events. The toys were supplied for all children at the session - why should your child get to play with 6 or more toys the entire session and other children have none. If I had been running the session I'd have asked you to limit to 2 maybe 3 toys at a time, the kind of behaviour I'd expect most adults to model as an example to their children.

His response also doesn’t fit what was being asked and you could point that out next time - they weren’t asking if you’re happy playing, they were asking if they could also play with one of the buckets. Shall we give him one and then you can both play? You never know, he might enjoy spreading joy and sharing - plenty of people do!

This thread has got to be a wind-up, surely? If not, then yabvvu!

Of course he can't hog 5 toys and a float for 45 minutes! I would have and have done the same as the other parent and just took them.

You know you were being a bit of a tw@t. It wasn’t even your own stuff - and you had loads of it. Teach sharing and kindness.

I would agree with you if you son had taken, say, one bucket and one watering can. But that is a ridiculous amount of toys to take! Of course he shouldn't have hoarded so many things and refused to let the other children have any toys for over and hour! There clearly wasnt anything for the other children to play with. Really bad manners and a bad lesson for your child.

And i would guess the reason they asked your son to share was because he was the child hoarding a pile of toys while everyone else had a reasonable amount (one or two) each!

You took too many toys and then went away and hogged them. Next time just bring your own and go to the pool whenever suits you.
If it is an organised group ( which it sounds like) then I would have swum up and picked up the toys not being used at the time and taken them to my DC, saying brightly " I see you are finished with these, thanks".

They weren't your toys, they were shared toys. You should have shared.

How can you possibly think it's ok you your dc to have a big pile of toys while another dc had none?

You allowed your child to hog far too many toys. He didn't have to hand over the watering can as he was actively playing with it, but you should have made him share some of the other things. Keeping six or seven different things to himself is ridiculous. He is going to grow up being disliked if you are not very careful.

Are you for real?? Your child was targeted because saying no, after playing with more toys than you can hold for an hour, and not being told by a parent that he must share toys that don't even belong to them, is not acceptable! Get your own toys, in fact get your own pool and don't expect your child to ever learn any social skills.

Because your child was hoarding multiple toys for over an hour. Your parenting, or in this case non parenting, was the issue here.

So you took a stash of toys and then moved away for your own private play where no one else could have them . And then let your son deny a child after an hour . You are a selfish brat .

lol are you joking? Most 3 and a half year olds can manage ‘no thank you, I’m playing!’ The other day mine asked told me she would call the police if I made her go to bed before 8pm! If your child isn’t speaking in sentences and able to respond in an appropriate verbal manner at that age there is some kind of delay.

Well that is the best scenario. Shocking behaviour from the OP ! Absolutely nothing worse than an entitled child,whatever their age .

Does your child have 7 hands? No? Then why does he need 7 toys?

You were being incredibly unreasonable to allow him to hog that many toys for nearly an hour and to refuse to share. You’re creating a spoiled and entitled monster OP.

Not making a child share one toy they are actively playing with - I understand
Not making a child share one of the several toys they have hoarded for an hour - you’re gonna create a super entitled child who will find it difficult to play with and work with others.

This is why your sons behaving as he was.

He had a watering can, 2 buckets, a float and "some" small toys. Why does he need 2 buckets? He literally doesnt have enough hands to being using all that.

He may have been "targeted" as you put it because he had excess toys - more than he could possibly play with. How long was "his turn" going to last with this surplus of toys he monopolised for 45mins?

I think if your son had all that and the othet kid had nothing you should have told him theres more children joining the session so youll have to give something to the other child and let him keep toys he was actively using not the full stash

I think we need the OP to come back and give her definition of 'share'.
I found this which fits well with my understanding of the word.... 'to divide and give out to others while keeping a portion for oneself'.
I suspect the OPs definition is more along the lines of 'take what I want, as much as I want, let someone else have it when I have no use for it anymore'.

So your kid had at least 6 toys to play with and you don’t think he should have to share? Having been to these kids of sessions with my own kids, generally there aren’t an unlimited amount of toys to go around, taking at least 6 of them for your child is excessive. By a) allowing him to take this many toys and b) thinking he shouldn’t need to share the excessive amount of toys, you’re teaching your child to be selfish and entitled…great job! 👏🏻

YABU x 1000

The selfish way other parents behaved at soft play when my kids were small is something I never forgot. Totally self absorbed in their own world with their own child. The OP is reminding me of such times...

Her child taking six toys for an hour, and refusing to share any under the guise of 'No thank you I am playing' is bonkers. How can you play with six toys at once? The subtext that you don't need to share until you have finished playing with them is so flawed. As others have said, this is not sharing, you are just dispensing with those toys when you are done.

Its clear that the OP has not taught her child to 'absolutely share'. She has taught him a rather obnoxious and belitting turn of phrase to bat other children away so he absolutely does not have to share. Very weird.