At what age - did you start allowing your child to bring a friend on holiday?

I think around 10 is ok, if you know the child well and it's a UK based holiday. Not sure I'd be comfortable taking a friend abroad until 13 or so.

We did this for years. We had 7 kids between us . One memorable jaunt to the lakes meant hiring a minibus as we also took 5 additional friends . Taking others kids makes the parenting load diminish to almost nothing .. except the ability to cook large meals but as I regularly catered for 9 , five more never really noticed .

We never did, it didn't arise, but I did go away with friends when I was a child, but only overnight. I was about 10 when I first went. Maybe did it about 4 times.

We did from quite a young age, my youngest had a good friend who knew us well enough and was happy to come. We also have a disabled child so it was much nicer for my youngest to have a friend with her.

Camping or caravan holidays, or UK holidays where you don't really incur extra costs for having 4 people rather than 3, absolutely go for it. In those situations, you could always take the friend home if it was a disaster, and it'd be reasonably easy! I'd recommend you choosing the friend, or a shortlist, for your child to choose from, and starting with a short break (maybe two or three nights?), to test the waters. Make sure you've had a chat with parents in advance, and try to plan the trip in such a way that they'll only need pocket money, not money for meals out, travel or tickets etc.

My only-child friend nearly always took a friend to the caravan from being about 7/8. They were close, and we all lived and were parented in a way where if we were doing something wrong, whoever was in charge of us told us off, and could dish out a suitable punishment. If your child has friends you'd be comfortable with, then absolutely go ahead for UK hols!
They didn't take other children abroad however, as it's more complicated and more expensive (incurs extra costs per person, versus driving to the caravan with an extra kid in the car).

My sister used to take a friend away to the caravan from being about 12/13, as I was older and wasn't there. The friend she usually took was lovely, and didn't get any other holidays or to really go many places, due to her home circumstances, so my parents were happy to take her, and knew she wouldn't act up, drop out on short notice, or wander off. She made the trips great for my sister, and my parents, as she was pleasant, helpful and put my sister in a far better mood than she'd have been otherwise! My dad's got really fond memories of her making everyone a cup of tea when they got back to the caravan after a walk one day, as my sister hadn't ever thought about doing that! It was often that they did free or cheap activities, and if they went out for a meal or activity, my parents would pay, but usually it was a long weekend away, with a walk around the nearby town or beach, maybe a pub drink at the end of a hike, and then back to the caravan for chill time and BBQs. When they went with a big groups of friends (about 6 families total), the friend was always invited, and the other families would also ask about her like they would me when we all got older!
My parents did then take her abroad aged 17, but that had actually been paid for by (& planned with) a different friend, who then got severely grounded and lost her permission to go abroad, and my parents said the only person they'd be happy to supervise on that short notice was 'caravan friend', but they chatted to her and her mum about how much spending money she'd need, what they'd be doing on their own versus what would be supervised by them, and what else she needed (passports, visa, toiletries etc). They said they wouldn't be happy to take anyone they hadn't had away in the UK, and wouldn't have done it when my sister was any younger!

I'd say you just need to be really clear what you'd expect from them, and ensure it's a child you'd be happy to take, have met lots and fed before, and you have talked them and parents through what to bring!

We haven't done it. Holiday is family time. If i had an only child I'd certainly consider it but our younger child would be majorly annoyed at being left out if his brother had a mate - and I'm not taking a friend each! I was allowed to take a friend as a teen for cheap holidays (think camping etc) once my older siblings weren't coming along anymore.

Yes, I have to say I've seen that happen more than once with friends' children!

Probably best to do it for fairly low-key and localish holidays.

For me the barrier wouldn't so much be the children's ages as whether I knew the parents well enough.

I would have to know another set of parents incredibly well to be confident enough to allow them to take my child away on holiday. And conversely I'd want to know the parents really well to want to take their child away with me. I'd need to be as certain as I could be that they knew me and would believe that I had done my best if any issues arose.

Until your child is old enough to look after and advocate for themselves, maybe a better solution would be to go on holiday with others who have children of similar age? Are you friends with any of the other parents from school? Or do you have any siblings you get on with who have children of similar age?

You don't necessarily have to all share holiday accommodation. You could agree to both get rooms at the same hotel, or different lodges at the same Center Parcs, or caravans on the same Eurocamp site, or whatever.

All depends on the family really, you need to be really aware of expectations, up front about money etc. I took DD’s friend with us but I knew her parents really well and we know their financial situation before asking and was up front about expectations (very little, we would fund most of it) with it being in the uk the extra costs were not high

Ive often thought about this but the money puts me off. It’s a huge amount of money to spend on someone else’s kid (and if you invite them I think you have to pay the bulk- I wouldn’t be paying for my DC to go on someone else’s family holiday…)

Also the drama if they fall out etc etc… so far we’ve just done family holidays our DC will enjoy!

We did it a few times but when DS was in his early teens: it was fine every time but I wouldn’t want to take younger kids or fusspots. You need to know the parents and the kid and form a judgement.

I wouldn't but I have 3 kids and that is enough to be responsible for. We have been asked though by ds's friends and I've politely declined. I don't do sleep overs so a holiday abroad is out of the question. Ds is a joy but he is boisterous and needs firm boundaries, for another parent that wouldn't make a restful holiday. I felt the request was very much about keeping their child occupied rather than taking into account my child's wants and needs.

If you don't mind me asking, what sorts of holidays did you do from tween age? My tween loves swimming so would still need this as an option.

Never.
Agree with pp who mentioned too much responsibility.
We also found the family time with just us and our children away from work/ school/ social pressures very special.

I have had in mind that DS (now 12) might want to bring a friend on holiday soon, bearing in mind that his sister will be leaving home next year for Uni.

However, tbh it’s not something I really want to do, especially as a single parent - taking two teenage boys on holiday would make it not a holiday for me! Also it is very expensive.

I really wanted to have a friend come on holiday with my family when I was a teen as I had two younger brothers who were sort of a pair, and I was on my own. My parents were open to it, if the family could pay the child’s way, but of course that never really panned out. It’s a bit of a different undertaking for a couple with three kids to take a teenage girl with them, as opposed to a single Mum taking someone else’s teen boy!

What would be great is if I had a Mum friend whose son got on well with mine or one of my son’s friends had a single Mum who’d be up for it (whichever way around) but sadly we don’t have another pair like that in our lives!

We never did, I would have hated the responsibility! Ds1 and 2 were close enough in age for it not to be an issue, and although there was a gap before we had ds3, he was always just happy being with his older brothers. We never went on hotel holidays as a family - always cottages here. or villas abroad, so no holiday clubs etc.

I know two separate families with only children and they fairly often all go on holiday together! Then no issues with looking after someone else's child, and the kids can play together and so can the adults!

Teenagers

Ours has never wanted to. He spent the rest of the school holidays seeing friends and socialising and enjoyed our 10 day family holiday. He's at uni now and still joins us for time during our UK holiday cottage hols.

Me neither, is it normal practice to take other peoples children on holiday? It doesn't sound very relaxing to me

Could you try it on a UK weekend trip and see how it goes? Or holiday with another family with kids same age? Might be a bit old for that now - we did that when ours were younger - we have 4 so do our friends - loved the chaos of loads of kids together.

As teenagers we allowed them each to take a friend which was easier as we have boys and girls - only for one week of the holiday - second week was just us 6. The offer is often reciprocated so mine have been to lots of other places with other families.

I never did. DD is an only, so when she got to tween-age and had outgrown the holiday clubs, I changed the type of holidays we went on to ensure they were better matched to her preferences.

I want to do this and am seriously considering it for my 12 year old daughter. What is stopping me is the fear that I will book it, pay for it, agree it with the parents and then the girls will fall out / drift apart / change friendship groups as girls do at that age. Not a problem for fairly last minute bookings but I tend to book ahead.