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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell DH to stop sulking after my jokey comment?

111 replies

Hayfever25 · 22/04/2026 19:00

I feel like DH has become a right grumpy so and so recently.

We are attending a friends’ wedding, it’s an abroad one in July. A couple we are close (she’s my best friend) with are also attending, and we met up with them on Sunday.

They had hoped to book the same hotel as us but found the rates had increased since we booked, so are staying elsewhere.

On Sunday, my friends H jokingly asked if we are sad they aren’t joining us. I replied along the lines of - ‘of course, I really wanted to see your bulge in your speedos by the pool’ and they both laughed. We have a very jokey relationship so it was a fairly ordinary comment.

DH had a sulk on driving home and when I asked why, he said the comment I made was inappropriate.

Is it me or does he need to lighten up a bit?

OP posts:
Laurmolonlabe · 22/04/2026 21:12

If you turned it around and your husband said to your friend he wanted to se her in a bikini so he could see how big her breasts are- how would you feel?

loislovesstewie · 22/04/2026 21:06

Gross, just gross.

momtoboys · 22/04/2026 21:05

Is he sulking or just thinking about how inappropriate you are? How embarrassing for all of you.

luckylavender · 22/04/2026 21:04

I find it really icky

Piglet89 · 22/04/2026 21:01

God OP, that’s horrifically shit patter.

WhatcakeshalIbaketoday · 22/04/2026 21:00

No doubt you meant it as a harmless joke and you left your filter at home. Don’t dwell on it and definitely don’t look in a downwards direction when you next see the friend’s husband.

Dinosnorous · 22/04/2026 20:57

🤢🤮

Skybluefrog52 · 22/04/2026 20:53

It's a very weird comment to make OP, especially about your 'best friends' husband.

Do you honestly not see how your 'best friend's' husband asking you if you were sad that he wasn't they weren't joining you and your comment of wanting to see his bulge is inappropriate? I can guarantee she is currently thinking you are sleeping with her husband (I wouldn't be surprised if your husband is thinking the same thing)

Have you actually spoken to these 'friends' since Sunday @Hayfever25?

ChaToilLeam · 22/04/2026 20:52

Urgh, what a sleazy remark.

Notmyreality · 22/04/2026 20:50

Im embarrassed on your DH behalf.

Dunnocantthinkofone · 22/04/2026 20:49

Oh dear OP, you made an embarrassing fool of yourself there
No wonder your DH is pissed off

Bingbangboo · 22/04/2026 20:46

I can't imagine ever saying that to anyone! I would be horrified if my husband ever told someone he couldn't wait to see their bits in a bikini. I think you've pushed the line between banter and being crude much too far.

diddl · 22/04/2026 20:40

So they ask if you wish that they were joining you & you make a reference to your friend's husband's cock?

Ok!

Zov · 22/04/2026 20:39

Really infantile comment. Are you 14? Awful crude vulgar thing to say. No wonder he was pissed off.

YABVU @Hayfever25 I can't believe you even have to ask!

pilates · 22/04/2026 20:39

I agree with your husband

Childanddogmama · 22/04/2026 20:38

You may consider it 'jokey' but most people, like your DH, would consider it inappropriate. I would think he is embarrassed and I think calling him grumpy is unfair.

FlyingApple · 22/04/2026 20:37

That's very humiliating for you DH, I would be upset with my husband if he did the equivalent to me. It's just not funny.

Cherry8809 · 22/04/2026 20:31

They definitely talk about how weird you are behind your back.

ThePrimeMinisterIsAbsolutelyFurious · 22/04/2026 20:31

Weird, crude, childish and unbecoming. Was that the look you were going for? Job done then.

Shinyandnew1 · 22/04/2026 20:27

I am not easily offended but what a bizarre thing for you to say!

Screamingabdabz · 22/04/2026 20:25

What, when asked that question, instantly made your mind go straight to your mate’s husband’s cock?

I’m team DH on this one.

Kitjo · 22/04/2026 20:23

Were you pissed? Even if you were single it’s a tasteless ‘joke’

CremeEggsForBreakfast · 22/04/2026 20:22

Hayfever25 · 22/04/2026 19:07

I’m not sure that’s quite the same. But I’d have laughed if he made a similar quip about seeing my friend in her bikini.

How is it not the same?!

Would would "a similar quip" about your friend be?

I'd be upset if my DH made a sexualised comment about my best friend. It wouldn't even occur to me to make sexualised comments about anyone else - let alone someone else's partner.

Constantcravingcheeseandchoc · 22/04/2026 20:21

CalmTheFuckDownMargaret · 22/04/2026 20:17

It’s a weird comment. You don’t talk about wanting to see your friend’s dick in front of your husband!

Or your friend! 😂

PrawnAgain · 22/04/2026 20:20

Excellent work OP