Page 7 | to be fed up with how little I can eat now I’m menopausal?

menno · 2026-04-20T07:58:44+00:00

Since hitting menopause my metabolism seems to have just given up. I have to live on salads and protein twice a day to keep my weight stable. I do weight training 3–4 times a week and exercise regularly. I guess that helps otherwise I would gain weight. Last week I went out for a birthday dinner and also had afternoon tea and cake and I’ve put on 2kg. Now I have to go straight back to being super strict, like fish/meat and vegetables every night just to shift it again. Pre-menopause I could eat more without watching everything. If I did gain, it would drop easily. Now it is hard work. DH and teen DC put away huge amounts of food and I have to watch everything I am eating. AIBU to find this really depressing and restrictive?

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:47

Whyarepeople · 20/04/2026 16:44

You absolutely can eat high calorie food. But you're convinced you have to stay at a certain weight so you're not allowing yourself to eat it. It's not a can't situation, it's a won't situation.

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This

Original poster

menno · 20/04/2026 16:47

Whyarepeople · 20/04/2026 16:28

I get that you feel uncomfortable at a certain weight but it sounds like losing weight is also very uncomfortable, in the sense that you have to restrict to an unpleasant extent. It may work out better for you to come to terms with being a little heavier than you like and maintaining at a higher weight rather than constantly trying to lose weight?

My TDEE will keep dropping as I get older so if I am a little heavier now that could be a lot heavier later.

OP posts:

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:47

menno · 20/04/2026 16:45

I was 66kg when I was chunky - that was in the obese category.

I am now 55.8 which is still in the overweight category according to the NHS BMI calculator.

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Are you 2 foot tall?!

Original poster

menno · 20/04/2026 16:45

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:30

Did you say you were 55kg? How much did you weigh when you were "chunky?! I haven't been that small since I was about 14.

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I was 66kg when I was chunky - that was in the obese category.

I am now 55.8 which is still in the overweight category according to the NHS BMI calculator.

OP posts:

Whyarepeople · 20/04/2026 16:44

menno · 20/04/2026 16:43

I wish I could eat high calorie food!

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You absolutely can eat high calorie food. But you're convinced you have to stay at a certain weight so you're not allowing yourself to eat it. It's not a can't situation, it's a won't situation.

Original poster

menno · 20/04/2026 16:43

Additup · 20/04/2026 16:27

Then I'm all out of ideas, sorry.

The only other thing I can think of is that you're underestimating what you eat/eating very high calorie food without realising 🤷‍♀️

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I wish I could eat high calorie food!

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godmum56 · 20/04/2026 16:39

Boxdyewilldo · 20/04/2026 09:03

I don’t think the 2kg you put in could have been 2kg in fat!

if you eat 2kg of food, even 2 kg of fat and sugar, you CANNOT put on 2kg

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:33

I would love to know how many of you are actually overweight and how many of you are simply annoyed that you are now 9.5 stone instead of 8.

chipsticksmammy · 20/04/2026 16:31

menno · 20/04/2026 16:13

What hope is there if even on GLP-1 the weight loss is still super slow?

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It been tough I won’t lie. It’s been very very gradual and the side effects…. Sheesh.

I’ve taken a very long term view. However it has shown DH and myself that all the comments I have had in the past about portion control, not exercising, and being a pear shaped girl have all been discredited. It’s stopped the food noise mainly, which went into overdrive when I hit 40 and started HRT.

When mum got breast cancer and I piled on all the weight, I decided to change. It all goes back on if I stop the GLP-1 but keep up with the new routine. My body can’t fight the weight gain even with all the best advice and effort.

I wish more was done to understand the why.

I’ve done no sugar, fasting, no carbs keto and pretty much everything else. The needle moves slow on my scales.

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:30

menno · 20/04/2026 16:25

I have been chunky and just felt uncomfortable all the time. My legs would rub together and I had rashes. My stomach was sticking out a lot - I would even get asked if I was pregnant. I would rather keep an eye on what I eat than go back to that.

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Did you say you were 55kg? How much did you weigh when you were "chunky?! I haven't been that small since I was about 14.

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:28

It's also almost impossible to get enough fibre on a low carb diet, especially bearing in mind the NHS guidelines are really the minimum you should be eating.

Whyarepeople · 20/04/2026 16:28

I get that you feel uncomfortable at a certain weight but it sounds like losing weight is also very uncomfortable, in the sense that you have to restrict to an unpleasant extent. It may work out better for you to come to terms with being a little heavier than you like and maintaining at a higher weight rather than constantly trying to lose weight?

Additup · 20/04/2026 16:27

menno · 20/04/2026 14:03

Thyroid is fine.

I am teetotal, always have been. I don't have much salt.

I walk at least 10k steps a day. I am upto 11804 steps already today,

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Then I'm all out of ideas, sorry.

The only other thing I can think of is that you're underestimating what you eat/eating very high calorie food without realising 🤷‍♀️

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/04/2026 16:25

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:23

I would be seeking treatment for your weird view of what looks good!!!

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I like Bountys... To be honest I'm generally so hungry that I even like the idea of Haribo...

Original poster

menno · 20/04/2026 16:25

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:18

I'd rather be a bit on the chunky side than live like that tbh.

I have been chunky and just felt uncomfortable all the time. My legs would rub together and I had rashes. My stomach was sticking out a lot - I would even get asked if I was pregnant. I would rather keep an eye on what I eat than go back to that.

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Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:23

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/04/2026 15:33

Same here. My weight is steady and my BMI is 21, but to keep it there I can only eat one dull, low carb meal a day. I run five miles five times a week, do a 45 minute spin class six days a week and three x 30 minute Pilates a week. I cannot do any more exercise! And I can't eat any less food! I'm nearly always hungry and every few months I fold completely and just fall face down in cake.

I'm in the middle of a lot of family weddings at which I have to appear slim, fit and smart. Once the last one is over I can foresee the discipline flying out of the window as a load of Bounty bars fly in the other way.

I would be seeking treatment for your weird view of what looks good!!!

Hellometime · 20/04/2026 16:20

It’s also a dilemma as we know what we should be eating for health but to try and fit it in cals wise is very tricky. So then it becomes another things to beat ourselves with. I’ve stuck to my cals but I’ve not had enough fibre or oily fish or whatever.

Loomis · 20/04/2026 16:18

I'd rather be a bit on the chunky side than live like that tbh.

Delatron · 20/04/2026 16:17

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/04/2026 15:54

My problem is time and availability. I run because I can run with the dog and I have no gyms near me and no time to get to them. So I am just doing the exercise that is easy for me to fit in. I do know that I ought to be doing more weights, but I would have to do them at home.

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Yep I get it. I love running and it’s so quick and easy. But it doesn’t help me with muscle mass or keeping weight in check unfortunately.

I have had to commit to doing weights at home. You don’t need a home
gym just a few sets of dumbbells and half an hour or so is enough. I aim for 3 times a week but should really do 4. Then I walk the dog and that is my cardio. This is after years and years of running and other cardio. Resting heart rate still low so it’s enough.

Jasmine222 · 20/04/2026 16:14

Same...and I have a skinny friend who doesn't seem to grasp that I'm not slightly overweight on purpose. I have Hashimotos, get masses of exercise (I cycle 30miles 3-4x per week)...but according to my BMI I'm slightly overweight (size 12-14) and I think I'd have to starve myself to lose weight. Not worth the misery. But I find it easier to relate to friends who can empathize, not the ones who eat anything and still look like someone out of Selling Sunset...

Original poster

menno · 20/04/2026 16:13

chipsticksmammy · 20/04/2026 16:00

I gained 2 1/2 stone (an extra 25% bodyweight). No thyroid issues, bloods fine.

TDEE to lose weight was 1200 calories or less per day.

Ive been on a GLP-1 for 2 years, max strength for most of that. Work out or walk every day. Trained for Hyrox, went from 0 to 5km runs.

I’ve still not lost it all. It’s bloody horrific.

The only thing I have learned is to be kind to myself and accept it

What hope is there if even on GLP-1 the weight loss is still super slow?

OP posts:

BringBackCatsEyes · 20/04/2026 16:11

Deflectalittle678 · 20/04/2026 15:46

I’ve no idea if this is scientifically correct or not but I’m beginning to think - speaking very generally - that once we have put weight on once, we have basically had it, and we are thereafter destined to eat virtually nothing or put on weight, because your set point has then been changed forever more, or whatever it is called, and the body always tries to return to it.

Added to that is the female body’s natural inclination to add a bit of padding post menopause and we are doomed!

We have to be realistic though. Very few women remain the same shape they were in in their twenties, in to their late fifties and sixties. However, the few women I know who have stayed virtually the same shape have remained that way since their teens and have never put weight on ever throughout their entire lives.

This is me. Give or take a bit I’ve been the same weight all my adult life.
I am the same now (55, 3 years post menopause) as I was a university.
I am a keen and competitive runner and most of my peers (there are age categories in races so you know who your peers are) seem to be similar.
Whether this is why we are decent runners or our steady weight is because we are runners is the burning question. It’s both I imagine.

chipsticksmammy · 20/04/2026 16:08

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/04/2026 15:36

This is it, a PP said that nobody ever died wishing they were thinner - well if they were dying several years earlier than would otherwise have been the case because they became so overweight, I think they might.

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Oh this with bells on. In my family either cancer gets you or a heart attack.

One person in the past 3 generations has made it to government pension age. She’s recovering from breast cancer.

Being overweight is one of the main causes. It’s brutal.

chipsticksmammy · 20/04/2026 16:00

I gained 2 1/2 stone (an extra 25% bodyweight). No thyroid issues, bloods fine.

TDEE to lose weight was 1200 calories or less per day.

Ive been on a GLP-1 for 2 years, max strength for most of that. Work out or walk every day. Trained for Hyrox, went from 0 to 5km runs.

I’ve still not lost it all. It’s bloody horrific.

The only thing I have learned is to be kind to myself and accept it

oatmilk4breakfast · 20/04/2026 15:58

Snippit · 20/04/2026 11:20

I put on over a stone when menopause hit. The way I’ve got rid of it has been intermittent fasting, 16 hours of fast and an 8 hour window to eat a healthy balanced diet. I now tend to have two meals a day, always have overnight oats at around 11am, I’m then full until at least 6pm. I generally eat the same as my hubby, smaller portions, eg, chicken, veg, potatoes etc. If I want a small desert I’ll have one. I’ve lost the excess weight and it’s staying off, it’s also easy to keep it up on holidays.

Please could you give me your recipe for overnight oats?! Sounds brilliant