AIBU to let my Year 10 child miss school sometimes?

My kids are younger but

I don’t want to force them; I encourage them but feel the drive should come from within

Imo this is from the same parenting handbook as 'my child will tell me when they are ready to potty train" 🤨😒

If everyone in society only ever did what they fancied we'd all be in big trouble.
Decent adults and good citizens understand sometimes you need to do things you dont want to.
I dont have a "drive from within" to get up and stay with my 4 yo from 1- 3 am I did it as its the right thing to do and you do what your supposed to even if you dont fancy it.

This is up there with ' i cant because of my "anxiety" '

Missing school to do what? There's a big difference between getting the work done at home or sitting in your arse watching tiktoks.

It’s the wrong thing to do imo. My kids have now left school but they needed to be practically dying before they had a day off school. They enjoyed most of their school days, have continuing friendship groups from both primary and secondary and have a good work ethic.

How are they going to manage a college course or full time job? You need to be working with your teen to build resilience. I do sympathise and it’s a difficult situation but I don’t think this is doing them any favours in the long term

I completely agree with this. As a parent, you need to build resilience. Choosing when to attend school won't do that. In addition, they will be missing teaching points, making it harder for them

Respect your child and listen to their feelings. School is the most unnatural environment created it’s amazing any kid agrees to go. As long as they are doing enough to move on to the next stage let them stay home teach them to look after their own mental health instead of pushing themselves to breaking point.

No I don’t think it’s the right approach either. They won’t be able to do that when they’re in the work place without the threat of disciplinary. If you don’t agree with the system, pull them out and home school, but you need to adhere to the system they’re in, it’s just life, the sooner they realise that, the better.

It’s not ok. You’re basically teaching them
that it’s normal
to run away from anything that’s a bit difficult and if you can’t be bothered to do something then you don’t have to.

Can’t say I agree with this at all, what will happen in a few years time when they start work? They won’t be able to hold a job down because you would have installed they don’t need to go in if they can’t be bothered! You may think you’re doing the right thing, maybe you are I don’t know but personally I believe you are setting your child up to fail.

I can see where you’re coming from but surely it’s going to worsen stress around exams and performance because they’re getting more and more behind?

My Dad taught me that resilience and self belief came from turning up anyway, and although I didn’t thank him at the time, I do think it’s served me well in life. You can’t avoid all situations.

Randomly missing school isn’t going to help anything. It’s more likely to make things worse rather than better, becayse theyre missing classes that will be part of a taught syllabus, so when they are there they’ll be trying to follow something that they missed the previous bit of.

If they’re genuinely struggling to cope then yes that needs considering but not by skiving off some days. It may be that they’re trying to do too many subjects and would be better dropping a couple and either doubling up on classes for others, or spending those timetable slots studying independently.

You bumped after 2 minutes? Why so impatient?

Personally I don't think that's the right approach. You are building avoidance of difficult situations rather than resilience.