To only invite one twin?

At this age then I think the parents are being silly. Or are they the type that still dress them the same and treat them in exactly the same way?

My daughter has two sets of twins in her class, when she first started school she was friends with the girl twin in one pair and so invited her to her party but not the boy twin. She was friends with both girl twins so both were invited.
At her last party she only invited one of the girls from the girl twin pair as that's who she is friends with. The girl twins are very different (one sporty, one girly) and have different personalities so it would be no different than inviting one child from a family and not their siblings.

They're not clones. One wasn't produced from the other.

I made it clear at school that mine were not a pair and could do parties, playdates etc separately. They have always been close but had no problems being separated for events like parties.

If one was invited on a play date I generally got the other one to choose a friend to invite home. That way they each had a fun time and neither of them was lonely without the other one.

I have twins…i wouldn’t mind the individual invites but ONLY if its drop and go parties - id like the time to spent 1-2-1 with the other twin as its so rare. But if you are expecting parents to stay then YABU - lots of single parents etc dont magically have someone who can look after siblings whilst they are at a party

At age 7 id have invited both I think.

One of the reasons why we put DT’s in separate classes from nursery and into school. They are separate individuals and don’t come as a pair.

You need to teach them that just because they are twins they are still separate people and allowed to have separate friends, or you are going to have issues later down the line.

Surely the point of them being in separate classes was that they're treated as individuals

I think the point is they have the same friends so not inviting one twin when you're friends with both is harder than inviting one cos you only really know one. Especially as that age, they're still in infant school

I wonder what my twisn would be like if thry hadn't split, they're similar in some respects but so different in others.
But it's weird you go around calling your children clones. Who do yo u say is the clone of who? Also clone implies a generational difference as one is made from the other.

At most, scientifically they're both clones of something that doesn't exist, so it's weird to tell them they're clones of a bundle of cells that no longer exists

I know 2 sets of young adult identical twins. One set, the parents wouldn’t let them have separate lives and did the same thing if one of them was invited somewhere. They now have no friends. Their parents have done them a massive disservice.

I'm a twin. I would have been severely pissed off if I wasn't allowed to have gone to a party because my twin wasn't invited.

I have an older sibling and I know I would have found it incredibly unfair seeing them being allowed to go to any party they were invited yet I wasn't allowed to go to one with my friends because my twin wasn't invited.

Fairness is treating them as individuals and I say that as a twin.

Devastating is little dramatic - it’s a party and they aren’t always going to both be invited. One gets invited and attends, the other doesn’t.

They're literally not clones. An egg split and turned into two zygotes and eventually babies with enough epigenetic changes that they have small physical differences and different personalities.
One of them isn't simply a copy of the other

I am twin. I am entire seperate entity to my twin and we went to loads of seperate parties at kids. I think even by 8 we were having our own parties as we had different friends.

Twins are seperate people and individuals. I never understand why this is so hard for people and even some parents of twins to understand.

I'd say they are clones The cambridge dictionary says
a plant or animal that has the same genes as the original from which it was produced
But they split from one embryo (embryo a), made from one fertilised egg, so you can either think of them as embryo a and b, so b is the clone, but obviously you'd never know who was b. Or that embryo a split and no longer exists, and they are embryo b and c, both clones of a. I do sometimes wonder who embryo a would have grown up to be, I don't think that it would have been either of my identical twins, but someone else.

Oh and yes they should go to parties separately, unless the birthday girl is friends with both and you think she is being mean to one by not inviting her. I have just once refused an invitation for this reason.

Surely the point of them being in different classes is precisely so they have different friends and aren't seen as a single entity?

I have twins, now adult. They have been going to different parties since they were tiny as they were in different classes and it depends on who they are friends with. Sometimes together if they both know the birthday boy/girl sometimes separately if they don’t.

It’s hard when one twin has an invite and the other doesn’t, particularly if it happens a few times but it’s your job as a twin parent to manage this. They are their own people. ( I’m a twin mum)

Maybe it would be tricky logistically with the two of them, and depending on age one might get upset not being able to go in as well so maybe just not worth the hassle for the parent. But YANBU to invite only 1.

This is quite a hard one. I have 7 year old girl twins. They don’t always play together but they do mix and match friends. If one was invited and the other wasn’t it would be devastating for them.

If they were in different classes then I’d expect them not to be invited together.

And it’s not the same as inviting a younger/older sibling. twins are at the same age and stage and fairness is a big thing for mine.

Reply saying you haven’t invited any children from the other class and no siblings so treating everybody equally (assuming that is the case).

thats crazy. I’m a twin. I am a totally separate being from my sister. It’s good for them to do things separately. Parents are batshit.

As a twin parent this is ridiculous. What a shame that the twin she is friends with misses out.

The point of choosing to put them in separate classes is to encourage independence and separate friends. I have twins and was happy for them to be invited individually, but I’ve also met twin mums who are really weird about treating them exactly the same. I used to take advantage of 1-1 time with the twin not at the party. I’d just reply, oh that’s a shame. Dd doesn’t really know Emma and it’s inviting close friends.