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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to refuse to let relatives take my children’s Easter eggs to donate to a food bank?

296 replies

ConnectionsAndWordle · 19/04/2026 14:04

We had relatives visiting yesterday who saw our children’s Easter eggs and throughout the day kept commenting that they have too many. I said they’ll eat them eventually so not to worry. They do have a lot, but they are all aged 15+ so perfectly capable of deciding what they want to eat. One child opened one during the day and offered it around. They’ve been sharing them with friends and will eat them so they won’t go to waste.

As my relatives were leaving, they said they would take some of the eggs and donate them to a food bank and started putting some in a bag. I told her to stop as kids would eat them. They continued choosing which ones to take so I again told them no.

One of my children came downstairs to tell them to leave them alone as well and asked them to put them back. Relative told my child (teen) that she should think of others and not be so selfish. I told her not to call my child selfish for not wanting to give away eggs that are theirs.

Relatives husband said I was being unreasonable and selfish, like my child. My husband then came home which stopped the conversation. They left soon after, without the eggs, but clearly weren’t happy.

They have sent me a text this morning to say they were disappointed in what I said and for siding with my child and that they would like an apology as they were ‘told off’ and were ‘made to feel embarrassed.’

Would you even bother to respond? It’s completely pathetic but I don’t feel like I have anything to apologise for.

OP posts:
EsmeSusanOgg · 19/04/2026 15:35

They were stealing from children to make themselves feel better. They should feel embarrassed. Shocking behaviour.

Also, is it not better for children to eat treats in smaller amounts over a longer time frame - rather than binge them all in one go?

DripDripAprilshower · 19/04/2026 15:34

Would you even bother to respond?

No.

Original poster
ConnectionsAndWordle · 19/04/2026 15:34

Butterme · 19/04/2026 14:53

I was going to ask if it was your mum and whether she is overly health conscious.

She was completely out of order and I would be telling her so and not inviting her around for a long time but it’s also worth reflecting on your children’s diets and whether they could be healthier.

Show quote history

I wasn’t going to get too deep into the eating issues but yes, my mum is very controlled in what she eats. She keeps her weight at the low end of healthy, which is fine of course, but we have had a few problems with her commenting on our children’s diets previously.

My children have always been a healthy weight and eat a good diet, but if I said one of them had a friends birthday party at the weekend when they were little, she’d straight away tell them not to eat too much. She took my son to a birthday party once because we were working and she told the parent of the birthday child not to put any cake in the party bag for my son, little things like that. I’ve had to tell her not to put her thoughts about ‘bad’ food on my children a number of times over the years. Thankfully my children all have a healthy attitude to food so I don’t think I need to reflect on their diets.

When they were here yesterday, I could tell that she kept thinking about the eggs as she was distracted after first seeing them and kept mentioning them. It’s definitely her food issues behind trying to take the kids eggs away, but I don’t think that makes it any better. She’s an adult and needs to deal with her issues.

OP posts:
CautiousLurker2 · 19/04/2026 15:32

Blisteringlycold · 19/04/2026 15:11

b) no respectable food bank would take unwanted easter eggs/sweets to distribute to families [especially so far after Easter], anyway. They want healthy food and staples.

How wrong can you be!

Show quote history

Already addressed this above - and not wrong with respect to my local food banks. Clearly there are different policies at different banks. Easter eggs, separate from specific pre-easter egg donation programme which local supermarkets and charities in my area operate, would not be much welcome.

musiclover2026 · 19/04/2026 15:32

They sound batshit but did they buy most of the eggs and they're secretly offended their presents are still lying around? I would cut back next year-the kids are obviously not fussed. I think you're right to be furious but as someone who loves chocolate I'd assume the kids don't want it if they still have loads left and are having to share with friends this long after Easter. I mean that's just unthinkable to me 😆

Springiscoming368 · 19/04/2026 15:32

You aren’t going to do this but go round to their houses proclaim they have too much food in their cupboard and say you can take some to the food bank

GinaandGin · 19/04/2026 15:31

Would they be trying to be controlling about what the kids eat ?
I honestly would tell them where to go

QuirrelsSquirrels · 19/04/2026 15:28

Some people are weird. YADNBU.

MyDeftDuck · 19/04/2026 15:26

Yeah, right…….they wanted those chocolate eggs for themselves! CF! And for them to ask for an apology because one of your DC told them to put them back just beggars belief!

Hope the kids enjoy the eggs

WonderingWanda · 19/04/2026 15:23

I would reply and say that they should feel bloody embarrassed. How dare they come into your home and start deciding what your children should do with treats their treats. Do they normally try to make decisions for you op?

Beachtastic · 19/04/2026 15:23

They're maniacs!

Are they churchgoers? I've seen this now and then, where so-called "Christians" want to score Brownie points in Heaven at the expense of their own family (but not, of course, at their own expense...)

MeetMeOnTheCorner · 19/04/2026 15:21

When mine were teens we did cut back on eggs! One smell one each from their grandma. Before that we bought one each but 2 is enough. I’d not be told what to do with them though!

loislovesstewie · 19/04/2026 15:19

I would have asked them if they felt like going through the house earmarking anything else for donation. In a snarky way.

numberblocks54321 · 19/04/2026 15:18

But yes, she’s completely being unreasonable.

numberblocks54321 · 19/04/2026 15:17

I wonder if it’s because it’s unhealthy food and that’s why it bothers your mum if she’s really into healthy eating… perhaps she feels anxious seeing her granddaughter having so much chocolate and her own issues with food made her want to get rid of it, and it was dressed up as donating to charity. Just a thought

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 19/04/2026 15:16

I would tell them they should feel embarrassed and told off.

I would also ask them to apologise for trying to steal your children’s property and refusing to take no for an answer.

I’m interested that they stopped when your husband (a man) arrived.

I wouldn’t invite them back, and if they ask why I’d say “because you tried to steal from me”.

MissRaspberryRipples · 19/04/2026 15:14

Bloody cheek of them. They probably wanted them for themselves else they wouldn't have faffed around being picky about which ones to take to "donate". Pretty sure food bank users aren't going to be fussy about what food they get given to them for free. Send your kids to theirs to go take stuff bet they'd soon kick off

Parsleyforme · 19/04/2026 15:14

Either no reply or say you would like an apology for them calling you/your child selfish and ignoring you when you said no.

It sounds a bit like my friend’s mum who does performative charity so people will think she’s nice (and she can then get things for free) but in reality is controlling, can be nasty and has zero emotional intelligence

ChocolateCinderToffee · 19/04/2026 15:12

I’d have slapped their hands.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 19/04/2026 15:12

Jesus Christ are these relatives okay? What bizarre and obsessive behaviour.
Send a reply:
Get a grip. The only apology should be yours.

I would not have hem back. I really wouldn't.

Notasbigasithink · 19/04/2026 15:12

ConnectionsAndWordle · 19/04/2026 14:04

We had relatives visiting yesterday who saw our children’s Easter eggs and throughout the day kept commenting that they have too many. I said they’ll eat them eventually so not to worry. They do have a lot, but they are all aged 15+ so perfectly capable of deciding what they want to eat. One child opened one during the day and offered it around. They’ve been sharing them with friends and will eat them so they won’t go to waste.

As my relatives were leaving, they said they would take some of the eggs and donate them to a food bank and started putting some in a bag. I told her to stop as kids would eat them. They continued choosing which ones to take so I again told them no.

One of my children came downstairs to tell them to leave them alone as well and asked them to put them back. Relative told my child (teen) that she should think of others and not be so selfish. I told her not to call my child selfish for not wanting to give away eggs that are theirs.

Relatives husband said I was being unreasonable and selfish, like my child. My husband then came home which stopped the conversation. They left soon after, without the eggs, but clearly weren’t happy.

They have sent me a text this morning to say they were disappointed in what I said and for siding with my child and that they would like an apology as they were ‘told off’ and were ‘made to feel embarrassed.’

Would you even bother to respond? It’s completely pathetic but I don’t feel like I have anything to apologise for.

Are you sure they weren't trying to take them for themselves? It seems odd to do this after easter and they could just donate chocolate to the food banks instead!

Blisteringlycold · 19/04/2026 15:11

CautiousLurker2 · 19/04/2026 14:34

I’D reply that “a) THEY were utterly selfish to expect to confiscate the property of your children when DC were perfectly free to decide whether they would like to donate them or not and b) no respectable food bank would take unwanted easter eggs/sweets to distribute to families [especially so far after Easter], anyway. They want healthy food and staples. And c) there are pre Easter charity drives where your family are welcome to buy and donate an egg at that stage next year, should they wish to, but they are out of order to behave the way they have.”

b) no respectable food bank would take unwanted easter eggs/sweets to distribute to families [especially so far after Easter], anyway. They want healthy food and staples.

How wrong can you be!

Jamesblonde2 · 19/04/2026 15:07

The cheeky sods. Your child’s Easter eggs are not for them to give away. If they’re so bothered they can buy chocolate and take it to the food bank.

Why do they see fit to enforce their views on you. Tell them to bog off.

Ansjovis · 19/04/2026 15:07

I wonder if your parents haven't quite come to terms with the fact that you're an adult in charge of your home yet. My family do this to me, they come over and start turning switches off and trying to throw away things they think are broken or past their useful life (and almost invariably are not either of those things!). I think it's because they don't really see me as an adult. 100% no apology from you, if they feel embarrassed then that's good!

rookiemere · 19/04/2026 15:03

If you don’t want to start a huge row the either ignore as you plan to do or something like “We’ll have to agree to disagree on that one. They are DCs eggs and it’s up to them what to do with them.” FWIW having a take it or leave it attitude to sweets is likely to result in adults with a healthy attitude to diet.
My DPs gave away most of my Easter Eggs to Banardos one year when I was young. They were/are sanctimonious twats around food as well and I ended up becoming a fat teen as I gorged on junk food as soon as I had the opportunity to do so.