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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I being greedy?

35 replies

whatintheworld11 · 18/04/2026 18:35

So last year, my SIL borrowed our lawnmower and then just kept it. When I finally asked DH to ask his sister to give it back (she kept ignoring me) as we needed to mow the garden she told him it had actually broken. I was understanding as lawnmowers can break so we left it.

Fast forward to this year, same SIL is asking to borrow the lawnmower again. I’ve absolutely refused politely saying “Didn’t you break the last one we lent you? To be honest I don’t want to give it as I really need to keep the garden tidy for the kids and I can’t keep buying lawnmowers”

I’ve now been accused of being “so greedy, what the hell is wrong with me” that it’s not even my lawnmower because her brother has paid for it (I’m on maternity leave and not working at the minute so DH covering most finances)

I mean DH has even said why have I made such a big deal and let them borrow it?

AIBU to not let them and think they should bloody well buy their own or should I do the neighbourly thing?

OP posts:
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Onelittledog · 18/04/2026 20:15

HideousKinky · 18/04/2026 19:46

Did you start a thread about this neighbour? The garden table & chairs being moved into neighbour's garden sounds familiar....

No, there must be more of them out there

JHound · 18/04/2026 19:47

Nesbi · 18/04/2026 18:37

Lend her a pair of scissors.

Ha ha ha! I love this and would do the same.

HideousKinky · 18/04/2026 19:46

Onelittledog · 18/04/2026 19:12

Puts me in mind of a neighbour I used to have who never bought anything. She borrowed my mop and bucket almost daily, I always had to go and ask for it back. It became "the mop", inferring joint ownership. I got so fed up I bought another. Me, my mop and bucket had several blissful weeks together before a request to borrow my mop came because "her bucket" had broken. I said no. Same neighbour once asked to borrow my dining room table and on another occasion I came home to find my garden table and chairs in her garden because they were having a bloody barbecue!!
Then there was the nightly treks down the road with various casseroles, lasagne etc that needed heated in my microwave because here had broken.
Oh! And regularly looking out of the window to see her hanging washing out on my line because hers was full.
I moved house in the course of time and the relief was immense.

Did you start a thread about this neighbour? The garden table & chairs being moved into neighbour's garden sounds familiar....

TheDenimPoet · 18/04/2026 19:39

How long does it reasonably take to mow a lawn? Send DH round with the mower, he can have a brew while they mow, and then bring it straight back with him. There's no reason for them to keep it for an extended period.

DreamyJade · 18/04/2026 19:37

Tell her to get the broken one fixed and she can use that one.

Scout2016 · 18/04/2026 19:36

Where's the broken one?

I can't believe she didn't replace the one she broke. Even worse she wants to borrow your new one. Then slagged you for not handing it over. Bloody hell, the nerve of some people.

Spotteddaisy · 18/04/2026 19:34

Petty but...If its an electric one take the fuse out of the plug, then lend it to her. Then after a week or so ask for it back and if she says it's not working tell her she owes you a new one as that's two she's now broken... 😆

nzborn · 18/04/2026 19:31

Id be tempted to lend them the broken one

Thefingerofblame · 18/04/2026 19:28

@whatintheworld11 does she have a birthday coming up? You could buy her one. I’d hate to get a lawnmower for my birthday but I would certainly understand why I did!

daisychain01 · 18/04/2026 19:28

why doesn't she buy a lawn mower on Amazon, crikey they're hardly a small fortune! Do you guys only cut your grass twice a year or something.

Firefly100 · 18/04/2026 19:28

My response would be ‘If I am the greedy one, how come it is you expecting to help yourself to my lawnmowers?

TheUsualChaos · 18/04/2026 19:26

Just tell them your current lawn mower is now broken and you need a new one.

Why on earth don't they just get their own? What a faff borrowing a lawn mower FFS.

PeopleLikeColdplayYouCantTrustPeopleJez · 18/04/2026 19:26

You’re “greedy” for not lending her your lawn mower after she broke the previous one? She sounds stupid. And like someone who needs to buy her own lawnmower.

Thefingerofblame · 18/04/2026 19:25

For me it would come down to who does the mowing in my house. My DH does, so if he wanted to lend it, I’d let him get on with it. I know it would annoy him to not get it back so he’d soon stop lending. If it was me, it would be a stern no if I hadn’t got the previous one back, even IF broken!

whatintheworld11 · 18/04/2026 19:24

Onelittledog · 18/04/2026 19:12

Puts me in mind of a neighbour I used to have who never bought anything. She borrowed my mop and bucket almost daily, I always had to go and ask for it back. It became "the mop", inferring joint ownership. I got so fed up I bought another. Me, my mop and bucket had several blissful weeks together before a request to borrow my mop came because "her bucket" had broken. I said no. Same neighbour once asked to borrow my dining room table and on another occasion I came home to find my garden table and chairs in her garden because they were having a bloody barbecue!!
Then there was the nightly treks down the road with various casseroles, lasagne etc that needed heated in my microwave because here had broken.
Oh! And regularly looking out of the window to see her hanging washing out on my line because hers was full.
I moved house in the course of time and the relief was immense.

Oh my goodness! Well I suppose I’m lucky she’s not this bad!

OP posts:
sesquipedalian · 18/04/2026 19:23

@ Onelittledog -
After the request to borrow the dining table, I would have tried to keep out of her way; I would have lost it over the garden furniture. As for her washing on my line - I don’t know how you put up with it. I might actually have unpegged it and retuned it wet, leaving her in no doubts as to what I thought.

Auroraloves · 18/04/2026 19:17

send her a link to one of those push along non electric mowers

Onelittledog · 18/04/2026 19:12

Puts me in mind of a neighbour I used to have who never bought anything. She borrowed my mop and bucket almost daily, I always had to go and ask for it back. It became "the mop", inferring joint ownership. I got so fed up I bought another. Me, my mop and bucket had several blissful weeks together before a request to borrow my mop came because "her bucket" had broken. I said no. Same neighbour once asked to borrow my dining room table and on another occasion I came home to find my garden table and chairs in her garden because they were having a bloody barbecue!!
Then there was the nightly treks down the road with various casseroles, lasagne etc that needed heated in my microwave because here had broken.
Oh! And regularly looking out of the window to see her hanging washing out on my line because hers was full.
I moved house in the course of time and the relief was immense.

Fantomfartflinger · 18/04/2026 19:09

The fact she ignored you and made you have to repeatedly ask for your own stuff back would infuriate me.

I would tell her to eat her grass like a cow.

ThatGladTiger · 18/04/2026 19:07

What is she going to do? Borrow it every 2-3 weeks when the grass needs cutting?!

Say no.

Fleurdalys · 18/04/2026 19:05

“ Fuck Off “ would suffice

whatintheworld11 · 18/04/2026 19:03

Thank you all! I will stand my ground! She’s been on 2 short breaks since Christmas so I’m sure they can afford one themselves 🙄. Might just say that if this saga bloody continues.

OP posts:
Hankunamatata · 18/04/2026 19:02

She should have replaced the last one!!!

WilfredsPies · 18/04/2026 19:00

Your DH needs to slap down the suggestion that you don’t have any say in it because he paid for it. And he needs to do that very quickly and very firmly. That would be a non negotiable for me, and if he didn’t, then I’d want a full explanation why. You’re his wife, there is no ‘his’ money and ‘your’ money.

I think I would have struggled to have kept my temper after she made comments like that. I’d be inclined to tell her that I initially hadn’t wanted to lend it to her because I didn’t trust her not to break it, lie about it and do fuck all to replace it, but after those little digs, she’d have more chance of me turning up on her doorstep with Alan Titchmarsh than she would of me lending her anything more than a bowl of sugar or the odd loo roll.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 18/04/2026 18:47

YA absolutely NBU!

No way should you lend it to her again when she broke it and didn’t even mention the face until asked, and didn’t offer to replace.

Your DH should have your back on this!