I had no idea that my friend is a multi millionaire!!

Bit oc a sweeping statement. You know stingy wealthy people. I know generous wealthy people. And most people are wealthy through hard work. Nkt stinginess. Bizarre comment!
Unless they won the lottery or inherited money.

Retired teacher, married, mother of three, multi-millionaire. Retired at 69, a career helping others for 47 years, and still doing charity stuff. Now mid-ish 70s. Nice home, not flash, just well-designed for a comfortable retirement. I wear clothes 10+ years old, because they were good quality classics. Big garden which I manage alone, and which provides produce, fruit and veggies, free-range eggs, for scores of people. We have many friends, ranging from our cleaner who has become our closest, to people much richer than us. We travel long-haul from time to time, economy, to conserve our assets for the DC, while we live off our pensions and the proceeds of investments. It was jam today or jam tomorrow for them, and they chose the latter. I see it as my moral and social duty to share my good fortune (inheritance) unobtrusively with friends and family. I would be horrified to discover any friends investigating my financial situation. Money is simply not discussed.

You found out by doing some online detective work so you have no idea what they plan to do with their money. For all you know they are so appalled at the amount they make they have decided to create charitable trusts. I know people who have done this. So stop your green eyed envy and take them on the front they show you. You were happy with your lot until you started comparing your life. No good will come from that.

Amen. The friend could have £1billion. But then passing on 2nd hand gifts they were going to bin, when the friend spends hard earned cash DOES MATTER.

It’s about respect, tight-fisted behaviour, selfishness. Ripping a friend off, etc.

Hi shockedpuppy. Wow I'd be shocked too! That's a huge turnover even if it's only a tiny bit of profit. I don't think your reaction is unusual at all. I think that would be my reaction too. There was something somewhere written that the people who are the most happy are those who are a little bit more wealthy than their friends. It makes sense therefore that those friends with less wealth will therefore be a bit unhappier! It's normal and natural to compare (I think it's part of being human) and also to have anxieties of how our children will do comparatively. It is a bit puzzling that they don't show much generosity and are actually bit miserly. It would definitely reframe how I saw my friendship. It would also make me wonder about how open they are about themselves.
The only advice I think applies in the words of my 93 year mother is ' Life isn't fair'.
In my 60s Im also starting to realise that health is more important than wealth ( but of course being able to afford private health care can even help a bit with that too!) Hoping your shock subsides soon and that we both win the lottery!

No, it's not necessarily jealousy. I've explained the reason for me above.

Yes, you nailed it.

It's jealousy that often turns into spite/resentment.

People saying they feel "betrayed" because their friends havent showed them their bloody bank balance- how ridiculous and intrusive and entitled.

They dont feel "betrayed" because the friends have done nothing wrong, they feel jealous and they are irritated as hell that their friends havent given them a good old chunk of their money. Thats what they are really pissed about. It's not that they didnt know about it, it's that they want a piece of it and they are angry they havent got it.

No, you don’t. Because if you know ANYTHING about business or how company accounts are made public record? You know what op has said is rubbish. Personally, I don’t believe everything I read.

I wouldn’t dream of looking up a friends financial position whether it is public record or not it wouldn’t matter to me, I just couldn’t do it if they are truly a friend

You can now see those who have control, usually due to ownership.

E.g. see image.

How many shareholders are there? Who are they would you even know as it usually only shows directors. So it’s hard to know where the wealth lies . Also does it include a value for good will that is speculative. There might be overvalues.

I finished with a “friend” for this reason alone. He was solid working class & a chav, married a gold digging chav. They got rich when their grandparents died who owned some council houses sold them on. He was left £1m and he owns a £1.3m home no mortgage he’s 50.

He had multiple foreign holidays with wife & 2 kids and they had the latest gear & want for nothing.

How I knew him originally was through work, he was thick as mince, but always fighting for work like his life depended on it. Literally elbowing people in the face for work.

Then the jigsaw pieces fell into place & in fact he was sheer & utter greed with his money-grabbing wife keeping up with the Joneses.

Having conversations with him complaining about his lot 24/7 for at least a year was the final nail in the coffin.

He would go cap in hand to his parents for handouts & they would cheesed off but caved in as the whole family was desperately keeping up appearances, his wife was the breadwinner & wanted him to be a stay-at-home dad, which he couldn’t face as he was desperate to create the right image. The wife I have a feeling was going to dump him as a useless, selfish, lazy lump now the kids were older and didn’t need babysitting.

Just things that came out in conversations were just eye popping: whereas I was going in the reduced aisle for food, couldn’t afford holidays for decades, clothes falling apart, no heating on. This chump was like money no object, and a carefree life.

His only beef was his own pettiness and jealousy over not be able to play golf during the day as much as he wanted to.

His endless tightfisted attitude & aggressive complaining about how hard done he was, deeply repellent man meant one day I told him to FO and blocked him & that was that.

I gather he & his wife have no other friends & selfish scumbag families, so maybe there are lots like him out there - chavs with money.

If they were to dissolve the company to access the wealth for starters there would be a large CGT liability ( 18 or 28% depending) and the Gov are taking away each year any tax advantage of being an officer in a company. By the time they sell out it will be even greater.

i would dispel it from your head if you want to be friends.

In terms of value, and value to them, I'd probably go and find the "persons with significant control" tab within "people" on companies house. See what the ownership actually looks like.

Then I'd find the last few years profit after tax and see what that would deliver income wise and use that as my basis for how I thought about things. If they're in a £20 mil net asset position that's great but it doesn't necessarily mean it's realisable, as we see when companies go insolvent.

That goes for every post in every thread. We have to go on the info we have.

Well, she doesn’t. And neither do you.

Because people quite often buy things for friends, subsidise them, etc. I would be annoyed if someone I thought was struggling was actually rich and let me buy all the drinks.

She said she knows it so I'm going by what she said.

plenty of people wealthy on paper have got there by being frugal.
Recycled gifts as long as appropriate are not only low cost but also good for the environment - the cost of a gift shouldn’t matter, it’s the thought that counts!
I am nowhere even close to those figures by a long shot, but I’ve been a single parent with surviving on £30 a week to feed my family - now I earn much much more and I’m comfortable, I still shop similarly as I did back then, why not? We’re all fed well and healthy so why would I spend more when it’s not necessary?!
seems like your just jealous and a bit put out

Comparison is the theft of joy.
Does this new knowledge change anything, and if it does, then ask yourself why.

I have an aunt that came into some serious money many years ago. All of a sudden, a lot of people she knew suddenly had financial crisis's and came asking for help.

I don't care what money the people in my life have (or don't). It is none of my business.

She’s looked at Companies House. That does not show net worth. Op knows nothing of the sort.

I think you should tell the whole friendship group so everyone stops subsidising their drinks.

If they start to pay their own way that's another thing.

your businesses why?

Yes, some companies have a much larger turnover than profit e.g. agencies. I get that. But OP also knows they have a 20 million net worth. Even if some of that is fixed assets, I'm guessing they're rich!