I had no idea that my friend is a multi millionaire!!

Wealthy people are just people, which means that they act in all the various ways that people tend to do. Some are ‘flashy’ and extravagant, others are more low key, others can be both depending on their mood and/or environment. Historically though, old money was incredibly, and competitively, extravagant. Until they started losing their money.

I’m ’new money’, and went to school with, and both personally and professionally socialize with, new and old money. Ime old money, of the type often admired on MN, are no more or less likely to spend on first class flights and Louis Vuitton than new money. That’s if they have liquid wealth, anyway. The only ones I’ve encountered that vaguely met the ‘dog eared cashmere’ stereotype do so not because they want to, but because they have to. The family money is not personally theirs, but exists as an entity in its own right, in the form of trust funds that can only be accessed for very specific things (for education or housing, for example). It is not something they have free access to.

Historically, old money was incredibly, and competitively, extravagant. Until they started losing their money. The ‘old money are better’ trope is a result of old money feeling threatened by the new money upstarts upending the established order and overtaking them. It was a way to assert themselves as still having the superior status because despite financial difficulties. Mind you, this was the same old money that made an industry out going to the USA in search of new money cash injections in exchange for titles. See ‘the dollar princesses’. Go figure.

We all feel flashes of envy, yes. But to regard paying off your mortgage as "meh" needs a bit of reality check, sorry.

Thats pretty ungrateful and miserable considering the state of the UK right now and how many people are financially struggling so yes, sometimes it is important to compare yourself with those who have nothing rather than people turning over 100 million pounds. If I spent my life comparing it to those earning millions or billions of pounds I would be miserable from the moment I woke up until I went to bed.

Feeling an emotion isnt the issue- marinating in it, is.

Some of the wealthiest people I have met have been the least extravagant and very down to earth. In fact, it’s only casually that I conclude they must be millionaires by piecing things together.

They have always been generous in my experience (in a very non showy way) but maybe I’m just fortunate.

She isn't doing that because she's just a normal human being.
We all tend to compare & envy upwards rather than thinking how lucky we might be, it's just part of the human condition & we all do it.
I would be shocked if I discovered a friend who seemed the same as me was actually rolling in it. Yes, yes, turnover isn't profit etc etc but with the turnover the business has they are hardly going to be pulling in pennies are they?
The OP has been given a hard time on here but I think she's just reacted as most people would.

She's NOT enjoying what she has though -thats the entire bloody point!

OP was perfectly happy with her lot according to her OP and was even looking forward to paying off her mortgage UNTIL she started snooping on her friend's company and it was only then she started to feel dissatisfied and meh about everything.

This is exactly why people are saying to stop focusing on it and stop comparing her life. Jealousy and bitterness wont make you happy and they are the fastest route I know to misery. Lots of people would love to be able to pay their mortgage off so you could equally argue why isnt OP comparing herself to people who cant even afford to buy a house of their own?

No. For me and a rich friend it wasnt buying him a drink I had a problem with, it was that he never bought a drink back if he could possibly avoid it. Would happily take from others but never reciprocate. If its equal all round then fine, but someone pleading poverty when they have the same, or maybe more, than you so you subsidise them is not ok.

That you are keen to discuss their position here speaks volumes about the kind of person you are.

I wouldn’t like to have a friend who would do this.

So because people are rich you should never buy them a drink? Wow, some toxic attitudes on here.

Turnover means nothing in this context .
They could make a relatively small profit and not pay themselves a lot

Of course not! Are you wealthy like this couple ? Why do you even care that other people finding it shocking as its such a small proportion of society?

Jealousy seems to be on the op mind. They do not have to divulge any information to you about their business, why do you think you have the right to know? It is very hard going making a business successful and they will have worked hard for every penny. A true friend would be thrilled for them, not jealous

I have a couple of friends who buy holiday homes and a yatch as birthday gifts and I’m talking 7 million worth massive houses . I have several that live in housing association houses and have to curb their spending . Point is someone is always better and someone is always worse than you and you cannot live thinking about what others have that’s awful

You know there might be NO profit right? Unless we know the company and look it up on companies house, there's no way to say that company doesn't have a lot of debt for example...

I've been in businesses doing far more than £100M turnover where we weren't making much profit and certainly none of us were rich. Don't mistake turnover and profit! Your friends are most likely living to the edge of their wealth, like many of us.

do you begrudge wealth?

OP I'm with you. People on here are batshit and if they are that rich and they feel offended you looked and are shocked it just shows how out of touch they are. Take no fucking notice! Regardless of how you work out their wealth a business that turns over 100 million is hardly going to be earning in the 100ks per year... it doesn't matter if you are off . They are bloody minted and if they cash it all in tomorrow will be beykng 99% of the population wealth. I'd feel exactly like you. But enjoy what you have as you're clearly also successful xm

May be not Donsyb but it’s warning to the OP not to gossip publicly about other people’s financial affairs particularly when the information is probably wrong

The OP hasn’t said anything here to identify who the friends are or what their business is, so there are no Data Protection issues.

My dad used to say "You don't get rich by spending money"...

Why should they?

Companies House reports has a disclaimer that they do not guarantee the information is correct.

It would seem OP also doesn’t appreciate the current difficult trading conditions.

OP should look up the number of companies going into administration.

The annual returns at Companies House are probably for year end December 2025, before the Iranian blockade of Straits of Hormuz.

OP should look to her own life - unless she works for HMRC. OP should also be aware of Data Protection Act

It's called being careful with money NOT stingy! Usually the most generous people are those who have the least!

You're in a great position financially to be paying off your mortgage. I don't know if I'll ever own a house. What would be the point in having millions of pounds ? There's a limit to how much money would make a difference in our lives

No wonder they haven’t told you, look at your reaction.

You're right that comparison is the thief of joy. Stay in your own lane to avoid that compare and despair loop OR compare yourself to the majority of people in the UK who are worse off.

It's a bit shit that they're stingy/tight despite being super wealthy though!