AIBU to be angry he locked us in while ill?

My house is 15 years old. If it's locked from the outside, you need to use a key to unlock the multipoint system, then push the handle up, then return it to centre, then push the handle down before the door will open. Obviously, this is brilliant for keeping burglars out, but somewhat less so if in a situation where some drunken twat has deliberately locked it from the outside and taken the only key with them - and worse still in the event of a fire.

That changes nothing in the moment that this man chose to lock his wife, his daughter and someone else's son into a building and take the key.

Im finding more and more that men only seem to think about things when it directly affects them… (sorry one of those days)

Most houses have the locks that the occupier is happy with, not what the builder chose for them 🤷🏻‍♀️

And no doubt we’d have a thread Dh left the door open all night we could of been stabbed in our sleep

no one died get more keys

Most older houses don't have a lock mechanism that can be twisted open, they have a regular lock, especially owner occupied houses.

This.

I can't believe people are saying that being locked in the house with no way to get put is something the OP should be fine with! If there'd been a fire she couldn't have got out - hopefully her daughter and daughter's boyfriend could have used the door the op's mobility issues stop her being able to get to, but if that's not normally used and they went to bed with no way of knowing the usual door was locked from outside they could also have lost too much time to get out in a fire - it's clear from the post that the locked door couldn't be opened from inside.

The door was presumably left unlocked for him because he got in without keys and then locked his wife in and took the key away.

No, not if she was locked in. It means she doesn't have those type of locks. I also don't have those type of locks and without the key, I cannot open my front door from the inside. You can change them out and you should, but getting a locksmith out can be costly if you don't know how to change them out yourself.

How did he get into the house? Surely if he had a key he should have used that when he left.
Otherwise this just sounds like you've had enough in general.

So interior they will have a turning lock mechanism that can be twisted open

You mean like the inside of the OP's front door.
Or the inside of any front door.
Simply turn the the lock and open the door and walk out.

Oh stop your nonsense. There’s a front door.

The building regulations for fire safety in flats requires that they allow escape without a key. So interior they will have a turning lock mechanism that can be twisted open or a push pad style - so you cannot be locked in, but your door is locked from the exterior.

If you live in an older building with the original door it doesn't require it to be changed out unless they change the door. It's very risky though.

@BeDandyFawn
OP
Please post a photo of your front steps so that we can settle this dispute.

So are you saying that everyone who lives in buildings with only 1 entrance/exit door (I think there are about 5.4 million people living in flats in the UK, many of whom won't have a back door) are all likely to die in fires at home?

If the OP really truly couldn't leave her house to do errands/leave for a date to meet someone by exiting her front door, then all
all the OP needed to do was get her daughter to go out the front door, round to the annexe, get the back door key off her dad, and unlock the back door!
But hang on - are we saying the OP is able bodied enough to run errands and go out for planned dates to meet someone, and can go up and down her internal staircase, but isn't able bodied enough to get down the steps outside her front door? Hmmm.
Well regardless, luckily we have a young daughter involved in this scenario who can easily retrieve the back door key off her dad and open the back door from the outside so OP can exit the building without having to navigate the front steps. And failing the daughter helping with this, we have a back up plan, which is to ask the daughter's boyfriend, who I presume is equally capable of being able to walk out of a front door, round to the annexe, grab the back door key off the dad, and open the back door for OP.
There you go.
Sorted.

You are overreacting to something your DH did when he was ill and presumably not thinking straight. Has this happened before? Wouldn’t it be better to put it down to experience and get yourself another set of keys for the back door.
(PS this wouldn’t be a problem in my house as, due to fire regs, my new build had to have a door that can be opened without a key. Might be worth considering this type of lock if being without keys is a persistent problem)

No you won’t!

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. I’ll be sure to let my firefighter husband know he can stop breaking into burning houses to drag people out, because apparently the experts on Mumsnet have decided that anyone with ‘full cognitive capacity’ can just calmly navigate a smoke‑filled building on their own. Fantastic news. I’ll also let him know that the annual training where they fill a building with smoke and make firefighters carry casualties out in full breathing gear is clearly unnecessary — because, again, Mumsnet has spoken. What a revelation. All these years of risking his life, and the answer was sitting right there in a forum thread. Incredible insight. Truly.

How did he get in?

.

No absolutely unacceptable- what if you had a house fire? You all burn to death because your DH might need access ?(which he wouldn't).
That takes selfishness to a whole other level- you are supposed to remain a human being (not become a selfish dickhead) even when you have a bug.
You need to call him out, and keep on about it until he sees how unacceptable this is.

😂 what?! Of course they can! Probably not 'designed ' that way, more cobbled together over the life of the property.
We have difficult steps outside, some are really deep, some normal, all different widths. People with poor mobility tend to really struggle.

Anyway I think this thread has gone a bit weird. OP didn't say she thought he was abusive, or wanted her to die in a fire- she said it was inconsiderate and putting himself first with no thought for her needs. The sort of thing you might well feel if you had a date to meet someone in the morning, or an appointment, or errands to run and you couldn't (or were late) because some fuckwit had locked your only reasonable means of egress and taken the key.

Yes, in a life or death emergency she might be able to use the front door. But maybe the cost to her physically wouldn't make that reasonable in any but the most extreme scenario. Like, if she recently had a hip replaced and needs to keep a stable pelvis and hip position when walking, so she really shouldn't fuck her hip up by going down the front steps and won't take that risk for a dentist appointment, breakfast with friend or posting something urgent, but obviously would if it was that or death. That's the sort of time you might well feel really pissed off with your husband because they've ruined your morning.

It's very different getting down internal stairs, which tend to have bannister rails, are frequently carpeted (or are at least dry), are a standard height and width and can pretty easily be got down by shuffling from a seated position than it is trying to get down external concrete or metal steps, which can be wet, worn, wobbly and don't always have rails on both sides that can be reached to steady yourself with two hands, never mind if you need to use a walking aid or crutches.

When I was moving (following dislocating my shoulder and ankle from slipping on external stairs), I viewed lots of properties and the external steps made them entirely unsuitable - some were set into bare soil and sunk at different angles, some were far steeper than any internal stairs I'd ever seen short of a spiral staircase, some were cracked and separating, some had external lifts fitted - I finally moved into a house with a block paved ramp/path - and then realised once the build was completed that whilst they'd made a path at the front, the step down from the back door was 3 foot.

So three adults. One set of keys????

The OP took herself upstairs to bed, and then went back downstairs again. She states this in her post.
I don't believe that her steps leading up to the front door of her house are more steep than the steps on her staircase.
No house would be designed to have steps leading up to the front door that are even more steep than walking up a staircase.