To find middle class parents insufferable?

That what happened at DC secondary.

Poor inspection - they has issue with lowest pupils not improving exam results fast enough - gave them a year next time they said same HT left, several governors left - staff started leaving - pastural care was stripped out - they had real issure recruiting another head - had to re-open process twice - they struggled to find governors local councillor stepped in in end. Results tanked, behavior derterioated - lots of supply - senior experinces staff feeling pushed out and leaving.

A decade of hard work by staff turning the school round getting really high results even turning round some very tricky pupils and bam it was all so quickly lost.

It stablised in youngest last years but she was very unhappy there - but the exam results are still really dire still as is staff retention and behavior of pupils and general view from pupils and wider local population.

The bullying at my really good state compehsive best in area - was fucking dire there was an attitude there it wasn't happening and if it did it was your own fault. I was phsiclaly assulted in a lessons - it was pretty awful place but had a solid reputation so my parents insisted I stay on for sixth form - was miserable then as well. DH say his bad school had less bullying because older family members got involved and often shut it down and school didn't deny it was an issue.

🥱 Feel free to educate yourself https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/journal-of-child-language/article/how-strong-is-the-relationship-between-caregiver-speech-and-language-development-a-metaanalysis/7D4F5197915114C0E2EF9E164FC71531

It's not WC v MC, more people who have the same family ethos. dd's bestie is working class, they chose to live in a Naice part of SW london in a flat instead of a house a couple of miles away, their kids go to "hard working kid" schools. Our family is more MC but we are still the same type of family -

Racist ? Who is racist ?

@Meadowfinch is right. Let’s say she did send her DS to a shitty comp with chair throwing kids and huge disruption. What is the more likely scenario?
a) he does exactly the same as he has done at his better school or
b) he doesn’t do as well because the school is worse and if so, what benefit is there to society?

Sadly a lot of it is about home life not school influence. It wouldn’t be the case that his decent upbringing would rub off on the other kids, but their disruption would affect him.

Depends on your definition of good, if so many people are slating it then it can’t be that good.
Im not ashamed to admit I sent my kids to the best school in town.
Plus the people who walk around calling themselves working class have no issues banging on about how they hate middle class people but cry and moan about any microaggressions coming their way. Some of these people actually have more money than me and there’s been times where I’ve been completely broke and my kids were still clean and taught to behave.

The comment about nursery and speech impediment is not a "horrible comment about disabled people". As nursery children are in the sensitive period of developing speech, it is essential for their caregivers with whom they spend hours every day to have clear articulation. That patent you found insufferable was displaying basic common sense and care about their DC's development.

And before you start on how horrible I am - I have a disabled DC with a speech impairment so I know what I'm talking about.

Your virtue signalling is just laughable.

DD went a primary in a deprived area, vast majority of parents did not work. They were extremely snobby about middle class people and people with jobs. So it works both ways.

we were on holiday in Cornwall and DD was playing with another little girl. We were chatting to the parents all fine. We both have professional jobs, so did they. They then asked where we were from (NE town) they recoiled! They then made their excuses and left like they would catch something from us.

@Meadowfinch is right. Let’s say she did send her DS to a shitty comp with chair throwing kids and huge disruption. What is the more likely scenario?
a) he does exactly the same as he has done at his better school or
b) he doesn’t do as well because the school is worse and if so, what benefit is there to society?

Sadly a lot of it is about home life not school influence. It wouldn’t be the case that his decent upbringing would rub off on the other kids, but their disruption would affect him.

When did I say that? Why are you quoting my posts and lecturing me about what other people have said?

So is that not the job of governers/MPs or whoever else to resolve? It’s not down to other parents or kids who behave. Especially ones who have never even attended that school and go straight to another one.

Maybe, but I won't sacrifice my ds' education to fix the world's problems.

Better to ensure ds has a great education, studies engineering at a great university and is then able to earn a lot, pay higher rate of tax and contribute to society that way.

I was a studious child and succeeded in a high earning career. I'm absolutely certain that my 35 years of higher rate tax paid (£500,000ish), has done more good for education in general than me sitting beside a troublemaker in school, to help to moderate his behaviour.

My point is that the whole thing can start with a bad Ofsted rating or a bad hire and spiral from there, until there are issues with bullying violence etc. A situation in which teachers work their fingers to the bone but the school is still considered a 'shithole' is soul destroying.

Well yeah you must do, other wise you wouldn’t be berating people for trying to avoid that happening by sending their kids to better schools. The whole point of this thread is we’re apparently insufferable for wanting our kids to go to good schools and minimise shit like bullying, drugs and yes head lice.

I don’t think they’re all insufferable but as I have moved up in the world I have found it harder and harder to make friends. I just have nothing in common with a lot of them. I like the occasional can of coke and fag, and I am still a bit rough, that’s just who I am. Most of the time I don’t care, I worked to be here so I’m going to be here, but sometimes it’s hard. My DD once hopped in the back of the car after schools and asked me what a chav was. I asked here where she had heard that and apparently a girl’s mummy said it and then the girl repeated it to DD. Kids lie and misinterpret things, but I’m pretty sure it’s true. I told her it’s a nasty word for working class people and to take no notice, but still it’s not nice. Be snooty all you want but don’t bring kids into it.

I have made some really good “posher” friends. The people I’ve met who I like, I really really like and enjoy spending time with. They don’t like all the things I like, but they’re open minded. I took one lady I met through work to my dad’s local pub for darts night and we had a blast. She told me she had never been to a flat roofed pub before so I absolutely had to do a bit of cultural exchange and show her the joys of the dive bar 😭.

Not you, other posters.

But you did seem incredulous that I didn’t want my kid to go somewhere they’d catch lice constantly. Do you find it fun spending hours combing lice out of hair?
Anyway I didn’t say they were poor, just trashy. I was poor when I had my first kid literally in a homeless shelter and only 16 and my kids have always been clean. You can’t buy class

My kids did go to what turned into a very bad school. Assults on pupils and teahcers weren't unknown but no-one was stabbed and while countlines was a school concern no obvious drug selling was going on according to pupils I know there.

However staff retention was dire post first head leaving- subject teachers indeed entire departments lacked permanat staff - low level disruption even in higher sets was every lesson - attendance levels were low and low expecations were shoveled at the kids and resulting in extremely low exam results and very poor career guidance.

The "dire" primary we got places at prior to secondary which looked good at that point - was actaully better then pervious good school. Smaller classes - less expatation parents like us would fill in gaps - much less busy homework - it was actaully better for them.

So I get why you skeptical about less good schools as it depends on what is meant what metric is being used to measure. However I think secondary there is a much bigger difference in state sector - just oppounties at different state school vary so much - but I'd look at staff rentetion figures, attendance levels and exams results and if they look good - I'd go round and get a feel for the place.

TBH using any cash to get into a great state catchment rather than pay for private is what a lot of better off parents do these days - they then also have an asset ie the house that tends to hold it's value rather than just paying school fees.

Oh so you're not? Strange... I thought you said this: It wasn't all great but it was a realistic cross section of society and arguably gives you good expectations of the real world.

Getting beaten and threatened is real world but now you're not going to give your DC good expectations of it? 🤔

Where were you hypocritical?

You’ve just reminded me of the teacher who admitted they sit the quiet kids next to the naughty out of control kids in an attempt to calm them down.
Literally used as collateral damage