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Original poster

Incident at school - come and give me your thoughts.

369 replies

Newnamez · 14/04/2026 08:43

DD is 12 and in yr7 (first yr of secondary).
On the last day of term before Easter she came home and told us that during the first lesson that day 2 'older girls' (she thinks yr9) came to the class (which had a stand in teacher that day) and asked for her by name and said she was needed at the school office by the Head teacher. She went with them. The girls walked ahead of her whispering.
By chance a TA that DD likes and chats to came out of a room and saw the three of them and asked the girls where they were taking DD. The older girls said 'the office' and the TA said i'll take over and they ran away. The TA shared with DD that one of the girls is her (TAs) cousin and said she was a ''little shit'' !! TA took DD to the office and no one had sent for her. TA took DD back to class. That's the bare bones of it. That is literally all i know.

Now, i hear about this at 6 that evening from DD and get more horrified the more i think about it. I emailed a head of year level teacher that evening. I heard nothing all easter holiday which is fine, but i heard nothing from anyone last night either. (yesterday 1st day back)

Ive told DD not to leave class unless an adult has come for her from now on.

Im going to ring the school this morning to ask to speak to someone in person about this.

Am i wrong or is this quite worrying?! How did the girls know my DD s name and where she'd be? Where were they taking her? Why were they wandering round the school? How are they going to stop this happening again?

What would you do/say?

TIA

OP posts:
Sidebeforeself · 14/04/2026 16:48

The only thing that puzzles me about HOY response is her commitment to personally escorting your daughter if she is needed. How long is that going to be practical for? Seems a bit OTT .

OriginalSkang · 14/04/2026 16:48

I wonder where the prank would have ended? It doesn't entirely add up. Where they going to run away when she knocked on the office door?

ProfessorBinturong · 14/04/2026 16:47

That seems a good response. No minimising, and a clear plan to prevent repetition.

ConfusedSoShutUp · 14/04/2026 16:46

dapsnotplimsolls · 14/04/2026 16:45

That's a very positive update.

I agree - I would feel reassured by this. The only issue is the length of time they got back to you - but explained by the fact the HOY was ill (teachers are human too).

BillieWiper · 14/04/2026 16:46

So presumably it was a prank. Unless this is a really rough school and you thought they might beat up/mug your daughter? I'd hope it wouldn't be that?

I feel bad for the substitute teacher. They should've phoned the office before letting her go.

But surely it's not usual for older children to be pulled out of lessons and told by the head to summon younger ones into the office for meetings?

If this is protocol in school then it shouldn't be. Only staff would or should ever be taking or telling kids to go to the office or anywhere in the school.

ThisAutumnTown · 14/04/2026 16:46

ThisAutumnTown · 14/04/2026 16:44

I’d be v worried if this happened to one of my daughters. Call the school and ask for a meeting with the head. God knows what they were planning!

Sorry I hadnt rtft. I’ve just seen the update and I’m glad the school are taking it seriously! That’s really reassuring.
I hope you and your DD are ok and will be able to relax a bit now xx

dapsnotplimsolls · 14/04/2026 16:45

That's a very positive update.

ThisAutumnTown · 14/04/2026 16:44

I’d be v worried if this happened to one of my daughters. Call the school and ask for a meeting with the head. God knows what they were planning!

Sidebeforeself · 14/04/2026 16:42

I think OP is being very calm and level headed in the circumstances.

Original poster
Newnamez · 14/04/2026 16:42

Update.
Have had a phone call from teaching lead (HOY) We talked for quite a while. These are the main points:

She is very sorry she did not respond earlier. She returned back to school today after illness over Easter.

The 'school' is very sorry and she personally is shocked by it and has not come across this happening before. She is very sorry too.

She would feel the same if was her child - she said a child has a right to be safe in school.

The TA reported the incident at the time it happened and the girls were rounded up immediately.

The parents of both girls were informed Going forward the main girl is going to be escorted from class to class within school.

The ringleader of the two girls has said she has no particular interest in my daughter, she set out to do this as a prank and spotted DD, open plan class room set up for that lesson (i didn't know this) sees supply teacher and knows DDs name. Gives it a go.

There is no policy where students are allowed to collect other students from classes. It should always be an adult.

Going forward if my daughter is needed it will be she herself who comes for her.

She is going to talk to DD tomorrow and reassure her and explain the point above.

She is going to ensure that all supply staff are aware that students do not collect other students from class.

She has said she is happy to meet me and DH. I've said i'll have a think and chat to DH (and MN) and let her know. She has said that's fine take my time

......

OP posts:
pinkdelight · 14/04/2026 16:39

FunMustard · 14/04/2026 16:21

This is bizarre behaviour from those girls, but I honestly find some bizarre responses here as well. James Bulger? OP's daughter isn't a toddler, and I don't think that she could be lured off the school premises by two other students, especially when they said she was needed in the office?

Take a deep breath and deal with the teachers. But you need to calm down. You're getting yourself whipped into a froth.

But you need to calm down. You're getting yourself whipped into a froth.

OP seems calm to me, not frothing at all, and you're being way too literal about the JB responses. There can be overtones without it needing to be the same.

FunMustard · 14/04/2026 16:21

This is bizarre behaviour from those girls, but I honestly find some bizarre responses here as well. James Bulger? OP's daughter isn't a toddler, and I don't think that she could be lured off the school premises by two other students, especially when they said she was needed in the office?

Take a deep breath and deal with the teachers. But you need to calm down. You're getting yourself whipped into a froth.

FunCrab · 14/04/2026 16:18

Has this been logged as a near miss at the school??

MyDeftDuck · 14/04/2026 16:17

I would want this thoroughly investigated……..and why were the other two girls randomly wandering about the school??

Hereforthecommentz · 14/04/2026 16:17

In my kids school they do have children that help out student services and collect children from classes for appointments, pass msgs to teachers ect. It's done on a rota so each child will get to do it. But this is weird as they clearly didn't actually need your daughter did they otherwise why would they run off when asked where they were going?! Does your dd know them, is there some back story as why would they ask for her specifically. It's is odd I hope you get to the bottom of it.

FunCrab · 14/04/2026 15:57

This is concerning.
what training had the supply teacher had as they could have said no or been more curious.
what were the two other students intention?
Have they done this before?
what systems are been put in place to ensure this does not happen again?
what training is been given to supply teachers re these incidences?
what is the process for taking a student out of class to go to the office?
has this been escalated as potential safeguarding?
have you had a written response with plan of action from the school.
Have the school formally met with you and DD?
please keep a clear log of every step of this, it does not smell right at all.

Original poster
Newnamez · 14/04/2026 15:38

Kepler22B · 14/04/2026 15:20

Not all schools use CPOMS, it is probably the most used safeguarding software but isn’t universal. But the school should have logged it somewhere.

You mentioned saying what you want when making a complain. What is that in this case? An apology, an assurance it had been investigated, improvement in process so students can’t all for others to leave the class…

Yes an assurance that it can't happen again and reasons to back this up.

I don't just want platitudes. I mean a sorry is always nice - but it's not what i'm looking for.

OP posts:
Original poster
Newnamez · 14/04/2026 15:31

diddl · 14/04/2026 14:37

she said she was mainly relieved that it wasn't true that the head teacher wanted her

She probably hasn't thought about any sinister motives that the girls might have had.

Yes, part of me feels happy that she still has enough innocence to be oblivious to how this could have gone, and part of me feels she's unprepared for secondary school.

She (and 95% of the other kids in her primary) joined a big secondary after being in a fairly small village school. We knew all the teachers and saw many of them often at out of school events like the village fete ect. I have 3 older girls who all walked the same path. Our problems back then were small fry to the things i hear about going on at that school now. I'm glad this is my last one!

OP posts:
WarmHare · 14/04/2026 15:30

Newnamez · 14/04/2026 08:43

DD is 12 and in yr7 (first yr of secondary).
On the last day of term before Easter she came home and told us that during the first lesson that day 2 'older girls' (she thinks yr9) came to the class (which had a stand in teacher that day) and asked for her by name and said she was needed at the school office by the Head teacher. She went with them. The girls walked ahead of her whispering.
By chance a TA that DD likes and chats to came out of a room and saw the three of them and asked the girls where they were taking DD. The older girls said 'the office' and the TA said i'll take over and they ran away. The TA shared with DD that one of the girls is her (TAs) cousin and said she was a ''little shit'' !! TA took DD to the office and no one had sent for her. TA took DD back to class. That's the bare bones of it. That is literally all i know.

Now, i hear about this at 6 that evening from DD and get more horrified the more i think about it. I emailed a head of year level teacher that evening. I heard nothing all easter holiday which is fine, but i heard nothing from anyone last night either. (yesterday 1st day back)

Ive told DD not to leave class unless an adult has come for her from now on.

Im going to ring the school this morning to ask to speak to someone in person about this.

Am i wrong or is this quite worrying?! How did the girls know my DD s name and where she'd be? Where were they taking her? Why were they wandering round the school? How are they going to stop this happening again?

What would you do/say?

TIA

I can’t explain it, but God this made me think of James Bulger.

HTruffle · 14/04/2026 15:22

What I wonder is why the teacher in charge of your DDs class didn’t question this? Especially if one of the older girls in question is a known troublemaker (which makes it highly unlikely she’s trusted to be a runner).

Kepler22B · 14/04/2026 15:20

Not all schools use CPOMS, it is probably the most used safeguarding software but isn’t universal. But the school should have logged it somewhere.

You mentioned saying what you want when making a complain. What is that in this case? An apology, an assurance it had been investigated, improvement in process so students can’t all for others to leave the class…

HelloCheekyCat · 14/04/2026 15:20

They have student helpers at DD's school (as in the present day) who deliver.messages, return PE kit left in a classroom etc, so there could have been a legitimate reason why they were out of class.
Obviously the rest of it is definitely not ok

Ukefluke · 14/04/2026 15:18

Very scary and premiditated. Not just just what they did, but the brazen lack of fear of authority to carry it through.

Tekknonan · 14/04/2026 15:13

This is very worrying and the school need to take it seriously and be seen to take it seriously. There are so many questions - where to start? You are absolutley right to take it up with the school, and don't let them waffle their way out of it.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 14/04/2026 14:42

Newnamez · 14/04/2026 13:35

OK.
Will they try and say i can't ? Is it common to ask to see it?

Show quote history

You can’t see CPOMs as a parent fully-it’s a safeguarding platform. The school can print you a redacted version without the names of other children (including those involved) as that breaches GDPR if you put in an FOI. This clouds the issue though.

your queries are how did this happen, why did they do this and what is happening next to keep your daughter safe.