To book a Gp appointment to discuss dd contraception options.

You can force her to attend a GP appointment. You can force her to take the pill or use a contraceptive. You can't stop her having sex. She will do it if she wants. Banning her seeing her boyfriend isn't going to help.

I'd sit and talk to her about consent. I'd discuss sexually transmitted disease and different types on contraceptive. Pregnancy isn't the only thing that needs preventing. I'd talk about intimate photo / video sharing which is a huge problem in her age bracket. I think thd sexual health clinic is a more appropriate place than the GP for her age but you can't drag her there. I'd leave condom in a visible and accessible place. If you have friends with your children I'd ask them to get her to baby sit for them.

You remove the opportunity for anyone to use her body until she is old enough to consent.

YEAR 9 or 10

'Pumping full of hormones' is such a melodramatic, hyperbolic and ridiculous way of describing perfectly safe and very sensible medical intervention to prevent pregnancy which would be far worse for a 16 year old than the minuscule levels of hormones introduced by an implant.

If this is how scared you are of contraception, the risks of pregnancy are going to blow your mind.

When I was around 15 and wanted to lose my virginity to my boyfriend I was very grateful to be able to ask my mum to make a GP appointment so I could get the pill. She didn’t judge me or say she was disappointed - she didn’t “facilitate” us having sex but we would have found ways anyway- I will be forever grateful she wanted to keep me safe more than she wanted to lecture me!

My concern is a 14 year old girl might feel pressured to have sex by her boyfriend or peers and by you taking her to the Dr it could actually pile the pressure on. Hormonal contraception has side effects too and she's still going through puberty.
I think at 14 I'd have a conversation about condoms instead and lots of conversations about consent and STI/pregnancy risks.
She is your daughter though.

Its not sad it's responsible. The GP agreed with me that it was the best course of action. She is absolutely fine with it in no side effects. I had my son at 16 and my daughter is nearly 16 and has told me when she's 16 she is going to progress the relationship so I am doing all I can to prevent pregnancy. Call it what you want but I am only preventing pregnancy.

9 or 10? Seriously?

This is really sad. Her developing body is being pumped full of hormones to inhibit its natural cycles, and she isn’t even sexually active. Poor girls - of course, no parent will be pumping their son full of hormones when he isn’t even having sex yet.

My DD is 15 and is in her first 'real' relationship. I booked a doctors appointment for her and told them I wanted the bar put in her arm. Two weeks later we went back and she had the bar put in. She is not sexually active yet but I was at 16 so I am taking no chances. She quite happily went along with it and now I don't have to worry about pregnancy for three years. She said she will get it put in again in three years when you have to change it. Our GP seen us both together and didn't ask me to leave the room at all although I would have been happy to do so.

Those remarks that 14 yos will have sex if they want to are so laissez faire.

Yes they may do if it's normalised by their peers and family but there are so many things parents can do to put them off - stop alone time, talk to them about risk, help them fill their free time with healthier activities, keep an eye on friendship groups and dynamics.

The age of consent exists for a fucking reason. It's to protect young people aren't ready for the pressure and risks of sex.

OP, none of the above is judgement on you, it's clear you're trying to support her but I think you need to stop them being alone together rather than pushing for her to go on the pill.

Same here - had cool groovy parents who let me have ‘sleepovers’ with my boyfriend when I was 13 onwards. Had the contraceptive ‘chat’, I went on the pill, but guess what? It turns out young teens aren’t very good at remembering to take it and I got pregnant anyway. I wish they’d just said no bloody sleepovers. I should never have been allowed the freedom that I was, I had no excuse to say no as I was constantly bed sharing with him and ‘we’ve done it before’

Well they don't have the right to force them into taking medication they don't want to, is that what you mean?

Well worth taking her. Although many mnetters will say this is dreadful, if there's a thread on when ppl first had sex there's many that have started in early teens.

At my school this was the case, also many teen pregnancies.

have you considered that we don’t post from naivety or prudishness but from our own experiences with very underage sex?

OP, I’d move mountains so that she doesn’t get opportunities. 14 is far too young and I wish my mum would have looked out for me.

If that fails and the horse has bolted then yes I’d make sure it’s safe etc but I wouldn’t enable it

THIS!! This should be the first discussion. Sounds like you are almost encouraging her.

if her boyfriend suggests it she may feel that she “should” be having sex / it’s totally normal given that you are encouraging it so much.

you shouldn’t be putting a 14 year old on long term contraception early “just in case” when she isn’t having sex.

what a bizarre world we live in.

It also reduces the risk of ovarian, endometrial, and colorectal cancers.

So what responsibility over their 14 year olds do parents have?

My son was with a girlfriend at school for two years (age 15-17) without having sex, she didn't want to. Maybe your daughter genuinely doesn't want to?

OP I think you're getting an unfair rap here, not sure why. PPs don't seem to realise that if a 14 year old wants sex they will find a way!
You've rightly emphasised consent. Can you now sit her down again and say you want to plan ahead so she's ready for when the time comes. If she agrees you can then take her to the doctor but don't go in with her. The doctor will call you in if appropriate.
The important thing is not to push her away and to do everything you can to keep lines of communication open.
Obviously you'd far far prefer her not to be sexually active but you do need to cover all bases, just in case.

Your kids aren't 'allowed' to have a boyfriend or girlfriend until university? Have any of them actually reached teenage years yet??

I wouldn't force medication, that increases the chance of developing breast and cervical cancer, on someone so young if they don't need it.

Why can't you trust what your daughter is telling you?

That will be for the GP or sexual health professional tp asess, contary to what others have said- they do have extensive training and experience in this !

But that's my point - IS DD consenting?