I go back and forth between thinking im being crazy and then thinking im being unnecessarily insecure.
I met this guy at a gig last year and we were initially just friends. But we started spending more one on one time together doing things.. we went out for dinner, to see a play, on a few long distance hikes, to see a film, to a couple of other gigs.
I find him very attractive and I started to think maybe he found me attractive too.
Just lots of eye contact and things like that.
He had mentioned he had a female best friend hes known since they were children and I have met her briefly a couple of times. She seems like a sweet person.
He confided in me that the year previous he had developed feelings for her whilst they were travelling together and eventually built up the courage to tell her.
She reacted quite vaguely apparently saying 'she wasn't ready for any relationship' and he said it turned out she was seeing someone and it was more serious than he'd realised.
However on another occasion he told me they had since broken up and she had rang him crying about it.
But when asked 'how's that developing' he always said that it wasn't and he did not think she liked him like that.
Well fast forward to the last time I hung out with him and it was just a really lovely time. We spent the whole day together and after dinner ended up going for a few drinks.
I went to the station with him, he ended up getting the last train home after missing a couple! We hugged and it went on a touch longer than usual.
Off the back of this i messaged him to say that perhaps we should consider actually dating in a romantic sense.
He replied immediately to say he would like that. Then replied again in the morning even though I hadn't replied to him, to reiterate the same thing.
Hes been away with work fir a few days and we were in contact most days.. but hes now going away for a week with his female best friend I was talking about earlier. This was obviously arranged pre us deciding to go on a date but its making me feel quite unsettled.
Of course I dont want to say anything to him about that as we haven't even been on a date yet so its none of my business.
But at the back of my mind im thinking 'am I wasting my time here? Am I just setting myself up to be hurt?'
Another factor is that ive recently come out of a long term relationship. I wasn't looking to meet anyone and I wouldn't have gone for this its just I really like him.
In a way that puts more at stake for me
He is a few years younger than me (hes 24 and i am 29) and this is another issue. He has never been in a relationship before at all, of any type.
That would put me off on paper but in person he seems emotionally mature, sweet and intelligent.
He said it just never happened for him that he connected with anyone, and he didn't want to hook up with just anybody for the sake of it.
Am I being completely delusional for continuing to invest in this situation emotionally?
I want to be relaxed about it but I feel like I like him a bit too much iyswim